RKMBs
Posted By: Glacier16 Gold digging fail - 2009-07-14 6:05 PM
[url=http://www.startupconversations.com/2007/10/best-craigslist.html ]http://www.startupconversations.com/2007/10/best-craigslist.html[/url]

 Quote:

An economic analysis of "gold digging" in NYC and enjoyable nonetheless.
The posting is interesting, but the response is the best.

THIS APPEARED ON CRAIG'S LIST RECENTLY.

What am I doing wrong?

Okay, I'm tired of beating around the bush. I'm a beautiful (spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I'm articulate and classy. I'm not from New York . I'm looking to get married to a guy who makes at least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don't think I'm overreaching at all.

Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around 200 - 250. But that's where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won't get me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she's not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I get to her level?

Here are my questions specifically:

- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars,restaurants, gyms

- What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won't hurt my feelings

- Is there an age range I should be targeting (I'm 25)?

- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east side so plain? I've seen really 'plain jane' boring types who have nothing to offer marri ed to incredibly wealthy guys. I've seen drop dead gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What's the story there?

- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?

- How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for MARRIAGE ONLY

Please hold your insults - I'm putting myself out there in an honest way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I'm being up front about it. I wouldn't be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn't able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a nice home and hearth.

* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 432279810

THE ANSWER
Dear Pers-431649184:
I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament. Firstly, I'm not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here's how I see it.

Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a cr@ppy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity...in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won't be getting any more beautiful!

So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. The n the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn't make good business sense to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease. In case you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It's as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.

Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So, I wonder why a girl as "articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful" as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K hasn't found you, if not only for a tryout.

By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation. With all that said, I must say you're going about it the right way. Classic "pump and dump."

I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of lease, let me know.


\:lol\:\:lol\:
Read this at another site, thought I'd share.
Posted By: Joe Mama Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-14 6:21 PM
The only problem I have this post is that Harley lied about her age.

\:lol\:

(I keed, of course!)
Posted By: Prometheus Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-14 9:05 PM
That was awesome.
Posted By: MisterJLA Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-14 9:52 PM
Yeah...
Posted By: MisterJLA Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-14 9:53 PM
Watch the clip, and then read some of the comments posted by the fellas...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NiHyVQod4HU
Posted By: thedoctor Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-14 10:31 PM
 Quote:
The fact is that Patti and her entire show are nothing more than a cheap jew scam. She finds people off of craigslist; both the supposed "millionaires" and the trashy slutty morons she puts out on the dates. Several of her "millionaires" were not millionaires at all and were, in fact, flat broke fuckers. She's a jew out to scam money through having a silly TV show that's about it.


We found Balloonknot.
Posted By: rex Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-14 10:32 PM
 Originally Posted By: Glacier16


THE ANSWER
Dear Pers-431649184:
I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament. Firstly, I'm not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here's how I see it.

Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a cr@ppy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity...in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won't be getting any more beautiful!

So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. The n the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn't make good business sense to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease. In case you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It's as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.

Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So, I wonder why a girl as "articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful" as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K hasn't found you, if not only for a tryout.

By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation. With all that said, I must say you're going about it the right way. Classic "pump and dump."

I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of lease, let me know.


I approve of this guys bitterness.
Posted By: thedoctor Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-14 10:34 PM
What bitterness?
Posted By: Prometheus Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-14 11:29 PM
Yeah, that dude wasn't bitter. That's a smart businessman. His response was flawless. He doesn't misstep...
Posted By: King Snarf Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-14 11:31 PM
At worst, it's cynicism, not bitterness.
Posted By: Nöwheremän Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 12:03 AM
At worst you are a twat, at best, a twat.
Posted By: rex Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 2:43 AM
He sounded bitter to me.
Posted By: Prometheus Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 2:52 AM
 Originally Posted By: rex
bitter.
Posted By: rex Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 2:53 AM
yes
Posted By: thedoctor Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 2:58 AM
 Originally Posted By: rex
He sounded bitter to me.


You don't know what words mean, do you?
Posted By: Prometheus Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 2:58 AM
You mom doesn't know what words mean...
Posted By: Prometheus Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 2:59 AM
That was so rex couldn't use it...
Posted By: Ultimate Jaburg53 Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 3:08 AM
 Originally Posted By: rex
He sounded bitter to me.


You never spent time with a woman whose vagina didn't spawn you.
Posted By: Ultimate Jaburg53 Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 3:08 AM
Vagina.
Posted By: Prometheus Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 3:12 AM
 Originally Posted By: Lucius Prometheus Vorenus
 Originally Posted By: rex
bitter.
Posted By: Lothar of The Hill People Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 4:49 AM
 Originally Posted By: Joe Mama
The only problem I have this post is that Harley lied about her age.

\:lol\:

(I keed, of course!)

Don't worry about it 'Joe. We all know you don't care about a girls age. However I do feel you should stay away from any female who has to wear a diaper.
Posted By: Joe Mama Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 6:17 AM
 Originally Posted By: Lothar of The Hill People
 Originally Posted By: Joe Mama
The only problem I have this post is that Harley lied about her age.

\:lol\:

(I keed, of course!)

Don't worry about it 'Joe. We all know you don't care about a girls age. However I do feel you should stay away from any female who has to wear a diaper.


Clearly you have me confused with Tommy. For that, I demand an apology.

I likes 'em ELDERLY!!!

(Which I guess means I like a certain segment of diaper-wearing female society...still, I know what you meant by your little crack, Lothar, and I still want an apology!)
Posted By: King Snarf Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 6:26 AM
Joe Mama- GILF hunter. Nothing wrong with that. There's quite a few old broads I'd sack if given half a chance....
Posted By: Rob Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 6:28 AM
you wouldn't even get three quarters of a chance!
Posted By: Ultimate Jaburg53 Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 6:28 AM
Even old ladies won't bang you.
Posted By: thedoctor Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 6:28 AM
So even the feeble minded elderly won't have anything to do with you, eh?
Posted By: Rob Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 6:29 AM
also funny here would have been:

"no!"
"you're bald"
something about karaoke*
"i hate you and wish you were dead!"



*something well crafted about you singing and singing being bad, and maybe about some sorta funny shirt you wore while singing. and baldness. maybe a picture nowie made of your head being kicked off by someone.
Posted By: thedoctor Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 6:29 AM
All together now!
Posted By: Ultimate Jaburg53 Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 6:30 AM
You should pick up a pack of dollar store teabiscuts and head to the nearest raisin ranch to tear yourself off a piece.
Posted By: King Snarf Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 7:00 AM
... What?
Posted By: Lothar of The Hill People Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 7:54 AM
Looks like Burg has been hitting the diet Pepsi Little hard tonight.
Posted By: MisterJLA Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 6:28 PM
 Originally Posted By: King Snarf
... What?


He meant "You are a douche. Fuck off, idiot".
Posted By: Prometheus Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-15 6:43 PM
\:whoa\: \:lol\:
Posted By: Joe Millionaire Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-20 2:02 AM
She reminds me why I eliminated Heidi.

Either her or Katie.

Either them or Sara.
Posted By: Lothar of The Hill People Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-22 8:52 AM
 Originally Posted By: Joe Mama
 Originally Posted By: Lothar of The Hill People
 Originally Posted By: Joe Mama
The only problem I have this post is that Harley lied about her age.

\:lol\:

(I keed, of course!)

Don't worry about it 'Joe. We all know you don't care about a girls age. However I do feel you should stay away from any female who has to wear a diaper.


Clearly you have me confused with Tommy. For that, I demand an apology.

I likes 'em ELDERLY!!!

(Which I guess means I like a certain segment of diaper-wearing female society...still, I know what you meant by your little crack, Lothar, and I still want an apology!)

Apology accepted.
Posted By: Joe Mama Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-22 7:11 PM
 Originally Posted By: Lothar of The Hill People
 Originally Posted By: Joe Mama
 Originally Posted By: Lothar of The Hill People
 Originally Posted By: Joe Mama
The only problem I have this post is that Harley lied about her age.

\:lol\:

(I keed, of course!)

Don't worry about it 'Joe. We all know you don't care about a girls age. However I do feel you should stay away from any female who has to wear a diaper.


Clearly you have me confused with Tommy. For that, I demand an apology.

I likes 'em ELDERLY!!!

(Which I guess means I like a certain segment of diaper-wearing female society...still, I know what you meant by your little crack, Lothar, and I still want an apology!)

Apology given, you sweet thing.


And accepted.
Posted By: Lothar of The Hill People Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-23 2:35 AM


Apology accepted,captain.
Posted By: Joe Mama Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-23 4:19 AM
 Originally Posted By: Lothar of The Hill People
 Originally Posted By: Joe Vader



Apology accepted,captain.


Argle gargle burgle gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!
Posted By: Ultimate Jaburg53 Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-23 7:09 AM
NERDS!
Posted By: King Snarf Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-23 10:29 AM
Those are delicious. Much better than Gobstoppers or other Wonka candies....
Posted By: PCG342 Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-23 11:21 AM
You really ARE a lame son of a bitch....
Posted By: rex Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-23 11:26 AM
He was really lame that one time he fake killed himself online.
Posted By: Joe Mama Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-23 7:04 PM
Could you three take your love fest to an IM chatroom, please?
Posted By: Lothar of The Hill People Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-25 2:55 AM
And I want to watch.
Posted By: Sparky the Wonder Kryptonian Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-25 2:58 AM
 Originally Posted By: Lothar of The Hill People
We just had our garage broken into. Two bikes were stolen. I've had it. From now on, anytime I see a hippie or hobo riding a bike that is too expensive for them to buy, I'm confronting them. If I see someone walking two bikes, (which I see almost daily) I'm going to confront them.
Posted By: Sparky the Wonder Kryptonian Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-25 2:58 AM
Damnit! I think I missed.
Posted By: Glacier16 Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-25 3:39 AM
*sigh* damnit Snarf.
Posted By: Nöwheremän Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-25 3:43 AM
 Originally Posted By: King Snarf
Those are delicious. Much better than Gobstoppers or other Wonka candies....

But you would give all of them up for a cock in your mouth wouldnt you, you fag cunt!
Posted By: King Snarf Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-25 3:50 AM
 Originally Posted By: Glacier16
*sigh* damnit Snarf.


It's not me.
Posted By: Nöwheremän Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-25 3:54 AM
It never is.
Story of your life!
Posted By: Irwin Schwab Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-25 4:26 AM
he didnt deny the cock in his mouth!
Posted By: Nöwheremän Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-25 4:26 AM
Yup!
Posted By: the G-man Re: Gold digging fail - 2009-07-25 6:55 PM
That'll learn im.
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