The gospel of Robert Kamphausen - 2010-06-22 2:44 AM
And lo did Robert look down upon his boards, and he was unhappy.
For four score and twenty minutes he had been trying to stop sheading a tear, and had not been most successful, for his board had become stricken with a pox.
That pox was King Snarf, a mewling weakling of a man, who like a cancer, had infected the very core of his once mighty message board, making it look weak to outsiders who didst turn their back on their children on weekends.
Twas not good that King Snarf made Robert look masculine, or that he made Rex look rational and not at all pathetic, so Robert didst formulate a plan to return things to their rightful status.
And thus did Robert call upon his hand of righteous justice, the Nowhereman, and task him to strike down furious vengeance upon the virginal weakling.
Nowhereman didst smite his most despised foe in but a blink of an eye, and there was much rejoicing.
Not since the mighty beast known as Uschi destroyed Beardgay, the prince off lies, was there this much rejoicing.
The rejoicing even outshone the rejoicing that was the visitation of PCGays bro imparting the tale of his siblings demise.
Amongst the rejoicing G-Methuselah didst have a rectal prolapse, as he was so overjoiced.
Sikkbones didst write a poem that spake of these times, but nobody couldst make head nor tail of it, as the patrons didst not speak retard.
And lo did Robert look down on his boards, and he was happy.
For four score and twenty minutes he had been trying to stop sheading a tear, and had not been most successful, for his board had become stricken with a pox.
That pox was King Snarf, a mewling weakling of a man, who like a cancer, had infected the very core of his once mighty message board, making it look weak to outsiders who didst turn their back on their children on weekends.
Twas not good that King Snarf made Robert look masculine, or that he made Rex look rational and not at all pathetic, so Robert didst formulate a plan to return things to their rightful status.
And thus did Robert call upon his hand of righteous justice, the Nowhereman, and task him to strike down furious vengeance upon the virginal weakling.
Nowhereman didst smite his most despised foe in but a blink of an eye, and there was much rejoicing.
Not since the mighty beast known as Uschi destroyed Beardgay, the prince off lies, was there this much rejoicing.
The rejoicing even outshone the rejoicing that was the visitation of PCGays bro imparting the tale of his siblings demise.
Amongst the rejoicing G-Methuselah didst have a rectal prolapse, as he was so overjoiced.
Sikkbones didst write a poem that spake of these times, but nobody couldst make head nor tail of it, as the patrons didst not speak retard.
And lo did Robert look down on his boards, and he was happy.
