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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153
Funny eyes 100+ posts
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OP
Funny eyes 100+ posts
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153 |
I got my Muslim friend really stoned last night.
In hindsight, I shouldn't really have told her husband about our affair.
Lets dance!
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153
Funny eyes 100+ posts
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OP
Funny eyes 100+ posts
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153 |
This woman knocked at the door this morning collecting for charity.
"It's for homeless dwarfs," she explained, rattling her bucket, "we're building them a shelter in the town".
So I gave her some Lego.
Lets dance!
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153
Funny eyes 100+ posts
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OP
Funny eyes 100+ posts
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153 |
A girl in a bar said to me, "I wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire."
I replied, "Would you do it if I wasn’t on fire?"
Lets dance!
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153
Funny eyes 100+ posts
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OP
Funny eyes 100+ posts
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153 |
Iman is such a hypocrite. She constantly complains that my dick is "too small", but suddenly it's "too big" as soon as I mention anal.
Lets dance!
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153
Funny eyes 100+ posts
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OP
Funny eyes 100+ posts
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153 |
I was shocked when I discovered the word breast actually meant boobs, and didn't mean penis.
I thought it was weird considering my Dad breast fed me until I was 6.
Lets dance!
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153
Funny eyes 100+ posts
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OP
Funny eyes 100+ posts
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153 |
I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny? Yeah, well I couldn't believe it.... He was a DWARF!!! He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, "I AM NOT HAPPY!!!"
So, I looked down at him and said, "Well, then which one are you?"
Lets dance!
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153
Funny eyes 100+ posts
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OP
Funny eyes 100+ posts
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153 |
I'm superstitious when it comes to Black people.
Whenever I see one I run.
Lets dance!
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 32,001 Likes: 1
We already are 15000+ posts
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We already are 15000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 32,001 Likes: 1 |
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153
Funny eyes 100+ posts
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OP
Funny eyes 100+ posts
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153 |
In basketball, taking the ball from your opponent is called a "steal".
No wonder why the sport is dominated by black men.
Lets dance!
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153
Funny eyes 100+ posts
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OP
Funny eyes 100+ posts
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153 |
Never work with children or animals.
They both tend to bite down.
Lets dance!
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153
Funny eyes 100+ posts
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OP
Funny eyes 100+ posts
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153 |
A woman with a clipboard just knocked at our door.
She asked me if we would have an Ethiopian child for Christmas.
We normally have a turkey but I'll try anything once.
Lets dance!
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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 19,436 Likes: 8
brother from another mother 15000+ posts
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brother from another mother 15000+ posts
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 19,436 Likes: 8 |
"My friends have always been the best of me." -Doctor Who
"Well,whenever I'm confused,I just check my underwear. It holds most answers to life's questions." Abe Simpson
I can tell by the position of the sun in the sky, that is time for us to go. Until next time, I am Lothar of the Hill People!
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 43,951 Likes: 6
Officially "too old for this shit" 15000+ posts
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Officially "too old for this shit" 15000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 43,951 Likes: 6 |
A woman with a clipboard just knocked at our door.
She asked me if we would have an Ethiopian child for Christmas.
We normally have a turkey but I'll try anything once. Isn't his wife Ethiopian?
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Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 23,089
The Once, and Future Cunt 15000+ posts
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The Once, and Future Cunt 15000+ posts
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 23,089 |
A woman with a clipboard just knocked at our door.
She asked me if we would have an Ethiopian child for Christmas.
We normally have a turkey but I'll try anything once. Isn't his wife Ethiopian? Somali
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 43,951 Likes: 6
Officially "too old for this shit" 15000+ posts
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Officially "too old for this shit" 15000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 43,951 Likes: 6 |
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 43,951 Likes: 6
Officially "too old for this shit" 15000+ posts
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Officially "too old for this shit" 15000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 43,951 Likes: 6 |
that reminds me of a joke.
What do Yoko Ono and an Ethiopian have in common?
Both are living off dead beetles
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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 19,436 Likes: 8
brother from another mother 15000+ posts
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brother from another mother 15000+ posts
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 19,436 Likes: 8 |
"My friends have always been the best of me." -Doctor Who
"Well,whenever I'm confused,I just check my underwear. It holds most answers to life's questions." Abe Simpson
I can tell by the position of the sun in the sky, that is time for us to go. Until next time, I am Lothar of the Hill People!
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153
Funny eyes 100+ posts
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OP
Funny eyes 100+ posts
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 153 |
I spent all day yesterday on the couch, masturbating.
The psychiatrist seemed to be taking a lot of notes.
Lets dance!
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Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 24,106
faggot 15000+ posts
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faggot 15000+ posts
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 24,106 |
my my mister brown. i seem to think you just showed your hand.
Old men, fear me! You will shatter under my ruthless apathetic assault!
Uschi - 2
Old Men - 0
"I am convinced that this world is of no importance, and that the only people who care about dates are imbeciles and Spanish teachers." -- Jean Arp, 1921
"If Jesus came back and saw what people are doing in his name, he would never never stop throwing up." - Max von Sydow, "Hannah and Her Sisters"
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Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 1,237
"Youtubie" 1000+ posts
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"Youtubie" 1000+ posts
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 1,237 |
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 2,089 Likes: 2
希望の戦士 2000+ posts
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希望の戦士 2000+ posts
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 2,089 Likes: 2 |
I don't know about you guys, but I'm never eating turkey again.
There is no version of this where you come out on top. Maybe your army comes, and maybe it’s too much for us, but it’s all on you. Because if we can’t protect the Earth, you can be damn well sure we’ll avenge it.
Hello?
Put Natasha on the phone.
Who is this?
This is her fucking son's father. Who is this?
This is her fucking son.
..........oh.......
Call back in 20 minutes. *click*
Boy, you could get lost in a sky like that. I wish I had those balloons again.
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 46,308
Who will I break next? 15000+ posts
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Who will I break next? 15000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 46,308 |
Look everyone! Its that guy that sang that crappy song to sammitch's ex girl friend!
November 6th, 2012: Americas new Independence Day.
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Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 47,810 Likes: 2
Hip To Be Square 15000+ posts
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Hip To Be Square 15000+ posts
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 47,810 Likes: 2 |
my my mister brown. i seem to think you just showed your hand. I liked the joke, and copied it to my facebook, so sue me!
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Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 24,106
faggot 15000+ posts
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faggot 15000+ posts
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 24,106 |
Old men, fear me! You will shatter under my ruthless apathetic assault!
Uschi - 2
Old Men - 0
"I am convinced that this world is of no importance, and that the only people who care about dates are imbeciles and Spanish teachers." -- Jean Arp, 1921
"If Jesus came back and saw what people are doing in his name, he would never never stop throwing up." - Max von Sydow, "Hannah and Her Sisters"
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Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 47,810 Likes: 2
Hip To Be Square 15000+ posts
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Hip To Be Square 15000+ posts
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 47,810 Likes: 2 |
I had to change a word though.
I am not posh enough to use the word masturbating
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Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 24,106
faggot 15000+ posts
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faggot 15000+ posts
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 24,106 |
Old men, fear me! You will shatter under my ruthless apathetic assault!
Uschi - 2
Old Men - 0
"I am convinced that this world is of no importance, and that the only people who care about dates are imbeciles and Spanish teachers." -- Jean Arp, 1921
"If Jesus came back and saw what people are doing in his name, he would never never stop throwing up." - Max von Sydow, "Hannah and Her Sisters"
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