RKMBs Forums .::Important::. off topic and offensive posts The Revenge of Frank Burns.

The 1981 Academy Award-winning film 'Chariots of Fire' was based on the stories of Harold Abrahams and Eric Liddell, two British Olympic competitors who beat the odds to become gold medallists at the 1924 Paris Games. Liddell won the 400 metres event while Abrahams won the 100 metre sprint. The theme music was composed by Greek Olympic enthusiast Evangelos Odysseas Papathanassiou (Vangelis) and is considered by many to be the best sports soundtrack of all time.

Only one Olympic medallist has also won the Nobel Peace Prize and that was Englishman (Baron) Philip Noel-Baker who won the silver medal for the 1500 metre race at the 1920 Antwerp Games. He won the Nobel prize in 1959 for his commitment to the reconciliation of nations and the prevention of war.

The 27th July 2012 is the opening day of the London 2012 Olympic Games but exactly 100 years earlier it was the last day of the Stockholm Olympics in 1912. It is precisely 2 days earlier than it was the last time it was held in London in 1948.

The first official supporting event of the London 2012 is the London Parade which will take place on the 1st of January 2012.

It has been announced that there will be serious fines of up to £20,000 for anyone 'streaking' at the London 2012 Olympic Games if they are using their nudity or partial nudity to advertise any product or brand that is not already associate with or a sponsor of the Games. It is uncertain what will happen to people who just get naked for fun

The Olympic flame will not pass through Norwich..

They don't want to risk the Torch Bearer being tried for Witchcraft.

Rain. Official weather supplier to the London 2012 Olympic Games.



Just got my tickets to the Olympic women's beach volleyball final!
Unfortunately, it's Iran versus Saudi Arabia.

Many Londoners aren't looking forward to the olympics due to the increase
of traffic, influx of foreigners and opportunist thieves. They have a point, I for
one can't imagine what a busy, crime riddled London full of foreigners would
be like.

An old man approached the White House from a cross Pennsylvania Avenue, where he'd been sitting on a park bench. He spoke to the U.S. Marine standing guard and said, "I would like to go in and meet with President Bush."

The Marine looked at the man and said, "Sir, Mr. Bush is no longer president and no longer resides here."

The old man said, "Okay", and walked away.

The following day, the same man approached the White House and said to the same Marine, "I would like to go in and meet with President Bush."

The Marine again told the man, "Sir, as I said yesterday, Mr. Bush is no longer president and no longer resides here."

The man thanked him and, again, just walked away.

The third day, the same man approached the White House and spoke to the very same U.S. Marine, saying "I would like to go in and meet with President Bush."

The Marine, understandably agitated at this point, looked at the man and said, "Sir, this is the third day in a row you have been here asking to speak to Mr. Bush. I've told you already that Mr. Bush is no longer the president and no longer resides here. Don't you understand?"

The old man looked at the Marine and said, "Oh, I understand. I just love hearing it."

The Marine snapped to attention, saluted, and said, "See you tomorrow, Sir."

President Clinton is invited by George Steinbrenner to opening day at Yankee Stadium. Mr. Steinbrenner asks the President, "Mr. President... Bill... since you are my special guest, and today is opening day, we'd like for you to throw out the first pitch."

President Clinton say excitedly, "SURE, I'D LOVE TOO... SOUUUIIEEEE!"

So before the game begins, the President is introduced to the crowd and the crowd applauds.

Bill does the Presidential wave thing...and then, he picks up Hillary, raises her above his head, and gives her the good heave ho straight across home plate. "SOUUUUIIEEEE". The crowd goes WILD!

George Steinbrenner puts his hand on Clinton shoulder and says, "That was just FANTASTIC...but I said 'throw out the first PITCH!'"

Q. Why won’t Obama laugh at himself?
A. Because it would be racist.

Q. How can you tell when Obama has been smoking dope?
A. He answers the door when the phone rings.

Q. Why did Obama change his name from Barry to Barack?
A. He thought Barry sounded too American.

Q: What do you get when you cross a crooked politician with a crooked lawyer?
A: Barack Obama.

Q. Why doesn’t Barack drink Pepsi?
A. He thinks that things go better with coke.

Q. Why wouldn’t Barack salute the American flag?
A. It was ours.

Anagrams
President Barack Obama = Arab base, pink Democrat
President Barack Hussein Obama = A Democrat speaks inane rubbish

Q. What do Obama and Osama have in common?
A. They both have friends who bombed the Pentagon.

Harry Truman said, “The buck stops here!”
Barack Obama says, “Leave the bucks here!”

Q. What’s the difference between Ross Perot and Barack Obama?
A. Ross Perot is crackpot with big ears; Barack Obama is a pothead with big ears.

Bill Clinton said, “I didn’t inhale.”
Barack Obama says, “I didn’t inject.”

Richard Nixon said “I am not a crook!”
Barack Obama says “I am not on crack!”

Q. Why did Obama think that he had campaigned in 57 states?
A. His heavy pot use has left him a brownie short of a full pan.

Like any experienced Chicago politician, Obama would go the cemetary to register voters. One night he came across a grave so old and worn that he couldn't make out the name on the tombstone. The staffer holding the flashlight got impatient and suggested they just move on to the next plot. Obama angrily exclaimed, "This person has a much right to vote as anyone else here!"

"According to a new book coming out by a Pulitzer Prize-winning author, apparently when he was in high school, President Obama smoked large amounts of marijuana. You know what that means? He could be our first green president." –Jay Leno

"It's a great day for our president, Barack Obama, who got to meet the Queen of England today. She very regally gave him a photograph of her, and he gave her an iPod! That's quite an unusual gift from the President. Usually he gives out about $150 million." --Craig Ferguson

"Barack Obama's daughters are very smart. They told him they will take the same responsibility for the dog that he is taking for the economy. That way, if the dog leaves a mess in the White House, it'll be cleaned up by future generations." --Jay Leno

"President Barack Obama told his Cabinet yesterday to insure that every taxpayer dollar is spent wisely. But there was one embarrassing moment when he had to explain to the Cabinet what a taxpayer was." --Jay Leno



"President Obama should get a big refund this year because he has a lot of dependents. AIG, Citibank, Morgan Stanley -- all dependents." --Jay Leno

"That's pretty amazing, Obama winning the Nobel Peace Prize. Ironically, his biggest accomplishment as president so far: winning the Nobel Peace Prize." --Jay Leno


"The Nobel committee said he won for creating a new climate for international politics. which sounds so much nicer than 'In your face George Bush you cowboy a**hole.'" --Bill Maher

Q: What does Obama call illegal aliens?
A: Undocumented democrats.

Q: Barack Obama is on a sinking ship, who gets saved?
A: The Country!

Q: How did Barack Obama propose to Michelle Robinson?
A: He got down on one knee and said "I don't wanna be Obama self.

Q: What's the first thing Barack and Michelle will ask their new pastor in Washington, D.C.?
A: 'Have you ever been videotaped screaming 'God damn America!'?



Q: How is Barack Obama going to get Republicans to cross party lines and support health care reform?
A: By giving their mistresses free breast implants!

G. W. Bush and Bill Clinton somehow ended up at the same barbershop. As they sat there, each being worked on by a different barber, not a word was spoken.

The barbers were both afraid to start a conversation, for fear it would turn to politics. As the barbers finished their shaves, the one who had Clinton in his chair reached for the after shave.

Clinton was quick to stop him saying, "No thanks, my wife Hillary will smell that and think I've been in a whorehouse."

The second barber turned to Bush and said, "How about you?"

Bush replied, "Go ahead, my wife doesn't know what the inside of a whorehouse smells like."

Four United States Presidents got caught up in a tornado and off they whirled to the land of OZ.

They finally made it to the Emerald City and went to find the Great Wizard...

"What brings the four of you before the great Wizard of Oz?"

Jimmy Carter stepped forward timidly: "I've come for some courage."

"No Problem," said the Wizard. "Who's next?"

Richard Nixon stepped forward, and said: "Well, I think I need a heart."

"Done," says the Wizard. "Who comes next before the Great and Powerful Oz?"

Up stepped Bush and said: "The American people say that I need a brain."

"No problem," said the Wizard. "Consider it done."

Then there is a great silence in the hall. Bill Clinton is just standing there, looking around,
But he doesn't say a word. Irritated, the Wizard finally asks, "Well, what do you want?"

"Is Dorothy Here?"

''I want to say one thing to the American people. I want you to listen to me. I'm going to say this again: I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Miss Lewinsky. I never told anybody to lie, not a single time; never. These allegations are false. And I need to go back to work for the American people. ''

—Bill Clinton, Jan. 26, 1998

If you can run and play any sport while wearing chanclas, Mexican Status

If your tio left you a van and you turned it into a taco vending business, yes you're a mexican

If you ever hurt yourself and your mama rubbed the area while chanting, " Sana Sana Colita de rana.." Your mexican. BIG TIME!!

If you have your last name in old english lettering anywhere on your car or truck or tattooed on your back. Yes, you are a Mexican (proud one too)

If you refer to your wife as your ruca, your hina, your wifey, or your vieja.. guess what? your Mexican

If you throw a "grito" everytime you hear Vicente Fernandez. Then not only are you Mexican your a drunk Mexican.

If you have ever been pinched in church and have been told "pobrecito de ti si lloras" or " Vas a ver orita que salgamos." Yes, you're definatly a mexican.

If you grew up scared of someone called the llorona and fear the dark because of El Cucuy. Yes!! Mexican!!

Si te percinas with a lotto ticket in your hand before every drawing.
you're in the Mexican zone.

If you ask for something by " dame esa chingadera" instead of calling it by its name. Yup. Mexican.

If you constantly refer to cereal as " con fleys" or cake as " kay ke" you're mexican.

If you use manteca instead of vegetable oil and can't figure out why your butt is getting bigger... you might be mexican.

If you have some tias that dress up in their prom dress to go to a birthday party at "el Parque" you are mexican.

If your tias and abuela dress up in their Sunday best with heels and all go to the pulga. Then yes you are a mexican.

If most of your houses on your block are bright pink, mint green, and purple...mexican

If you use the bushes in front of your house, the fence, or the top of an old car to dry laundry. Yes, you are a mexican.