"Americans love Chilean miners. I haven't seen so much hoopla about an endless procession emerging from a scary hole since the Octomom." —Bill Maher


"One guy had four women waiting for him. There was the wife he never divorced, then there was the woman he lives with, then there was his current girlfriend and then the baby mama. He is now known as the Tiger Woods of mining." —Bill Maher, on one of the Chilean miners