The young virgin farm boy drives to the big city in search of a prostitute. He finds one, and explains he has never had sex before. The hooker says, " No problem, honey." She undresses the boy, then herself, and lies down on the bed. He crawls on top of her. "Okay, stick it in honey...all the way in...now pull it out... now put it back in...now pull it out..." "For goodness sake," says the boy, "will you make up your fucking mind?".
The new hooker just finished her first trick and when she came back down to the street, the seasoned veterans all gathered around to hear the details. She said "well, he was a big muscular and handsome marine". "Well, what did he want to do?" they all asked. She said " I told him that a straight lay was $100, but he said he didn't have that much". "So I told him a blow job would be $75, but he didn't have that much either". "Finally I said, well, how much do you have"? The marine said that he only had $25. The new hooker said "well, for $25 all I can give you is a hand job" He agreed and after getting the finances straight, she said " he pulled it out and I put one hand on it, and then the second hand above the first and then the first hand above the second hand....." "Oh my god" they all exclaimed, "it must have been huge"! " then what did you do?" "I loaned him $75!" she said.
