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There comes a time in everyone’s life when there’s no more room to run. . .

*Shot of Chris Oakley in the ring with a microphone. “There is a traitor in the Bastardo Family! And that traitor is. . .King Snarf!”

A time when lines are drawn. . .
*Shot of Louie Bastardo in the ring, ranting.
“Are you the Bastardo Family? Or are you a bunch of jobbers?”

A time when decisions are made. . .
*Shot of Oakley crawling towards the ropes during the Fenway Park match. Scene cuts into slow motion as Louie Bastardo slowly brings the giant trophy down on Oakley’s
head.
“What has Louie Bastardo done to his wrestler???”

and a time when alliances are shattered.
*Shot of Joe Mama and Louie in the ring, Louie speaking.
“Chris, James, and anyone who wants to side with them in all of this. . .YOU’RE FIRED!!!”

For warriors such as this. . .
*Shot of PenWing holding the Crotch up against the wall, as Meeko looks on.
“You sick bastard! What do you think you’re doing?!”

in times like these. . .
*Shot of Grace standing over Nuriko, screaming into a microphone.
“Did you think you could get away with trashing me, bitch??!”

There is a time to stand up. . .
*Shot of Grimm confronting Balls Nasty on the rampway.
“You’re living in the past! You’re living in 1992!”

and a time to fight.
*Shot of the last ten men brawling in the Rumble.
“It’s chaos! It’s a car wreck with human bodies!”

When your back is against the wall. . .
*Shot of Howler in the ring with the rest of the Company:
“Losing to two-bit jobbers should not happen to men of our stature!”

When ghosts from the past return to haunt us. . .
*Shot of Balls Nasty, walking back up the ramp after eliminating himself from the Rumble.

“I told you, Grimmonowski, it’s gonna be on my terms!”

When evil hounds our every move. . .
*Scene of Johnny Evil on the Cheese-O-Tron screaming.
“$10,000 to the man who eliminates Notwedge from the Rumble!”

When there is nowhere left to run. . .
*Shot of Nuriko slashing her samurai sword and screaming:
“I’M GOING TO KILL YOUR LYING, BACKSTABBING ASS, YOU BITCH!!!”

When there is no way to escape. . .
*Shot of King Snarf in the locker room yelling:
“HE HIT ME WITH A FRIGGIN’CAR!!!”

When there is. . .

NO WAY OUT OF THE CLOSET!!!!

*Shot of King Snarf looking at Joe Mama: "And if you think I'm giving you a Valentine's Day cookie bouquet like I am Louie and Grace, then you've got another thing coming!"

RDCW presents No Way Out of the Closet Feb. 27th, 2005 on pay per view!


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The Bastardo Elimination Chamber

Chris Oakley vs. The Bastardo Family!

The BattleWar!
Donkey Lovin Tag Champs Princes of the Universe vs. the winners of the Mini Rumble!

Hardcore Porn Champ PenWing defends against former champ Wednesday in a bout to be named!

Lightweight Faggot Champ Son of Mxy defends against the winner of the #1 contenders match!

EuroTrash Champ Captain Sammitch defends against the winner of the four man elimination match!

Lipstick Lesbian Tag Champs Mid-West Hotties defend against The Divas!


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What about the titles held by the Bastardo's? Surely they should be called upon to defend their titles?

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Well, we would, but unfortunately there are no challengers of quality at the moment.


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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Is that an offer?


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Silly Sammitch. I said quality!


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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Quote:

James_Fantastic said:
What about the titles held by the Bastardo's? Surely they should be called upon to defend their titles?




Ridiculous! There's not a one of you that's worthy enough to face my champions in the ring! You've been jealous of King Snarf's title since you arrived in RDCW! You thought you could fool me? Hah! I was watching you the whole time! I watched you stirring up Oakley and the rest against us!

Well, I'll tell you what, Mr. Jimmy Faboo, you want a match against the Bastardos so bad? You want them to be "called upon" to defend their belts? Well then, you need to earn that right! If you can last fifteen minutes in the ring with King Snarf on Havoc, he will see fit to grant you a title shot! I don't think you can do it! You don't have the sac!


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The Bastardo Elimination Chamber

Chris Oakley vs. The Bastardo Family!

The BattleWar!
Donkey Lovin Tag Champs Princes of the Universe vs. the winners of the Mini Rumble!

Hardcore Porn Champ PenWing defends against former champ Wednesday in a bout to be named!

Lightweight Faggot Champ Son of Mxy defends against the winner of the #1 contenders match!

EuroTrash Champ Captain Sammitch defends against the winner of the four man elimination match!

Lipstick Lesbian Tag Champs Mid-West Hotties defend against The Divas!

Flag Match!
Rue de Nocturne vs. Typhoid Dave!


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Quote:

Louie Bastardo said:
Ridiculous! There's not a one of you that's worthy enough to face my champions in the ring! You've been jealous of King Snarf's title since you arrived in RDCW! You thought you could fool me? Hah! I was watching you the whole time! I watched you stirring up Oakley and the rest against us!

Well, I'll tell you what, Mr. Jimmy Faboo, you want a match against the Bastardos so bad? You want them to be "called upon" to defend their belts? Well then, you need to earn that right! If you can last fifteen minutes in the ring with King Snarf on Havoc, he will see fit to grant you a title shot! I don't think you can do it! You don't have the sac!




It's a deal! And what's more, If I last, I want our match to be an Asylum Rules match!

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Quote:

Louie Bastardo said:
Quote:

James_Fantastic said:
What about the titles held by the Bastardo's? Surely they should be called upon to defend their titles?




Ridiculous! There's not a one of you that's worthy enough to face my champions in the ring! You've been jealous of King Snarf's title since you arrived in RDCW! You thought you could fool me? Hah! I was watching you the whole time! I watched you stirring up Oakley and the rest against us!

Well, I'll tell you what, Mr. Jimmy Faboo, you want a match against the Bastardos so bad? You want them to be "called upon" to defend their belts? Well then, you need to earn that right! If you can last fifteen minutes in the ring with King Snarf on Havoc, he will see fit to grant you a title shot! I don't think you can do it! You don't have the sac!




I think I want a piece of that action myself...I'm just itching to get my IC belt back from JOKE Mama.

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Well, Mr. Oakley, you have to wait until the outcome of the Bastardo Elimination match! If you don't win, you're still not allowed to compete for a title for a whole year! And when you don't win, the whole Bastardo Family will be laughing at you! I'll see you at Havoc, loser!


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Quote:

James_Fantastic said:
Quote:

Louie Bastardo said:
Ridiculous! There's not a one of you that's worthy enough to face my champions in the ring! You've been jealous of King Snarf's title since you arrived in RDCW! You thought you could fool me? Hah! I was watching you the whole time! I watched you stirring up Oakley and the rest against us!

Well, I'll tell you what, Mr. Jimmy Faboo, you want a match against the Bastardos so bad? You want them to be "called upon" to defend their belts? Well then, you need to earn that right! If you can last fifteen minutes in the ring with King Snarf on Havoc, he will see fit to grant you a title shot! I don't think you can do it! You don't have the sac!




It's a deal! And what's more, If I last, I want our match to be an Asylum Rules match!




You got it, punk! Prepare to be humiliated by the greatest World Champion ever! Snarf's gonna end your miserable little career before it's begun!


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Quote:

King Snarf said:
Silly Sammitch. I said quality!




Well, then, since I'm such a pushover, it would be an easy title defense for you, wouldn't it? I see how it is. I won't push the issue if you're scared.


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Quote:

Chris Oakley said:
...I'm just itching to get my IC belt back from JOKE Mama.




Well, well, well...if it isn't the broken record himself. Don't you understand, Chris? You had your shot at greatness! With Louie Bastardo as your manager, and me working behind the scenes, you had your chance to the one of the greatest wrestlers in the RDCW! But you were too gullible and stupid to accept the gifts given to you. You chose that over-rated jobber James Fantastic over the Family, and you lost everything. You lost your shot at MY title for one year and yet you STILL don't get that fact!!! Why the Doctor saw fit to make a title shot against me part of the Bastardo Elimination Chamber stipulations, if he even did that, is beyond me. But rest assured of one thing: At NWOOTC you will be forced to face the simple, inevitable fact that your greatness is long gone. The Family will destroy you one final time, and then wash its hands of you completely.

And as for you, James, it strikes me as bad comedy the comments that come out of your mouth. The Family is "dead"? King Snarf and I "aren't that great"? How many titles have YOU won? How much gold have you, and do you, wear around your waist? For someone who has barely been a blip on the Championship radar screen, you do talk a good game! Too bad you don't have the ability to back up your words. Or was that someone else swimming in a tub of MisterJLA's seed? Why don't you put a string of victories together and then MAYBE we'll consider giving you a title shot at us! But, until then, at least you'll have younger, healthier skin!


Uschi said:
I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry.

MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost!

"I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock

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Quote:

Captain Sammitch said:
Quote:

King Snarf said:
Silly Sammitch. I said quality!




Well, then, since I'm such a pushover, it would be an easy title defense for you, wouldn't it? I see how it is. I won't push the issue if you're scared.




Yes, I'm scared. But not of you. I'm scared of how the Doctor will react once I've retired yet another Superstar!


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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You won't find it so funny when you're sharing the retirement home with BSAMS, Kristogar Velo, and TK-069!


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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Have you figured out yet that nobody's scared of you?


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I think he knows that women are afraid of him.


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Quote:

Captain Sammitch said:
Have you figured out yet that nobody's scared of you?




Oh, really? Then why hasn't TK-069 shown up for a rematch? 'Cause he's scared! Why doesn't ROY BATTY post here? 'Cause he's scared! Why hasn't Nowhereman asked for a World Title shot? 'Cause he's scared! Fear me, for I am King Snarf! Retirer..er of Superstars! Mass Debater extraordinaire! Connosuier of Hickory Farms Gift Baskets! And arguably the GREATEST World Champion the RDCW has EVER SEEN!


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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You're just making your own downfall that much more inevitable. It may not be me who takes you down, but I guarantee that somebody will. I personally think it should be someone deserving, like PenWing. But you're afraid to give him a title shot.


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What afraid? He HAS a title shot! He won the Rumble! Though, knowing him, he'll probably have you wrestle for him, thus causing him to lose the title match. After all, that's how he lost the Hardcore Porno belt!


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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ROY BATTY has been posting almost everyday.
Nowhereman probably doesn't want you touching him with your gayness.
TK is taking a break from the boards.


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Quote:

rex said:
ROY BATTY has been posting almost everyday.




Not in this forum he doesn't!

Quote:

TK is taking a break from the boards.




And this break conveniently started right around the time I beat him for the title.


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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Fantasy land is fun, isn't it?


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Quite! But I'm also having fun here in the real world.


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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You think this is the real world?


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Well, sort of.


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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Thats pretty sad.


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But I'm still champ! And the guy who beat you in the mass debating competition! You are a second-rate mass debater!


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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I dont wanna challenge for any title at the moment Snarf!
The heavyweight title is no longer of interest to anyone cause if you can win it,then it has no value anymore!
I'd rather fight for the womens belt,at least that still has some credibility!

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Yeah plus he's not even the real Snarf!


Fucking Pretender!


Snarf Snarf.....All Hail The Real King Snarf!
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Quote:

King Snarf said:
What afraid? He HAS a title shot! He won the Rumble! Though, knowing him, he'll probably have you wrestle for him, thus causing him to lose the title match. After all, that's how he lost the Hardcore Porno belt!




What? Through the overt cheating of your "Family"? Because I've beaten half of them (though your Stalinesque 'purge' booted most of them out since then) in straight-up matches. some more than once. You don't think I could beat you? I happen to think what Joe did was self-seeking, dirty, and low. But I at least have respect for his abilities in the ring. You have yet to show me anything that might evoke a similar respect. Why should I be afraid of you?


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We should probably be saving this for in-rings.


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Sammich might be gay,but he'd bring more credibility to the belt than Queenie does at the moment!

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The Bastardo Elimination Chamber

Chris Oakley vs. The Bastardo Family!

The BattleWar!
Donkey Lovin Tag Champs Princes of the Universe vs. King Snarf and Joe Mama!

Hardcore Porn Champ PenWing defends against former champ Wednesday in a bout to be named!

Lightweight Faggot Champ Son of Mxy defends against James Fantastic!

EuroTrash Champ Captain Sammitch defends against Nowhereman!

Lipstick Lesbian Tag Champs Mid-West Hotties defend against The Divas!

Ten Year Grudge Match!
Grimm vs. Balls Nasty

Flag Match!
Loser has to eat poo!
Rue de Nocturne vs. Typhoid Dave!

Howlerama vs. Los Monstrous Azules!

No Holds Barred
Nuriko vs. Grace
Bastardo Family and Tommy banned from ringside!
Special Guest Referee: The Crotch!


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This card is getting better by the minute!

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The Bastardo Elimination Chamber

Chris Oakley vs. The Bastardo Family!

The BattleWar!
Donkey Lovin Tag Champs Princes of the Universe vs. King Snarf and Joe Mama!

Hardcore Porn Champ PenWing defends against former champ Wednesday in a bout to be named!

Lightweight Faggot Champ Son of Mxy defends against James Fantastic!

EuroTrash Champ Captain Sammitch defends against Nowhereman!

Lipstick Lesbian Tag Champs Mid-West Hotties defend against The Divas!

Ten Year Grudge Match!
Grimm vs. Balls Nasty

Flag Match!
Loser has to eat poo!
Rue de Nocturne vs. Typhoid Dave!

Howlerama vs. Los Monstrous Azules!

No Holds Barred
Nuriko vs. Grace
Bastardo Family and Two-Ton Tommy banned from ringside!
Special Guest Referee: The Crotch!

Tommy Savitz vs. Charlie!

RDCW NO WAY OUT OF THE CLOSET! Tonight!


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Quote:

madman marcum said:
The BattleWar!
Donkey Lovin Tag Champs Princes of the Universe vs. King Snarf and Joe Mama!
RDCW NO WAY OUT OF THE CLOSET! Tonight!




Now, hold on just a second. Now, I won't debate that Joey Muumuu and Wiley Kit there have earned a shot at the titles by winning the Mini Rumble, but the Mini rumble was also meant to celebrate my performance at the RDCW Rumble. Therefore, we are also giving a shot to the team who, like me came in fourth place. Sooooo...

The Battlewar will be a three way match between The Princes of the Universe, King Snarf and Joe Mama and Captain Sammitch and Penwing. On top of that, it will be a no dq elimination match. Oh, one more thing...FALLS COUNT ANYWHERE. The ring, the women's shower, a video store on the other side of town. ANYWHERE.

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Quote:

madman marcum said:

Tommy Savitz vs. Charlie!






Not that I'm complaining, but why? I mean, all the other matches here are parts of mighty feuds and grand title matches, and then we have me against a mad dude from the Company. What's the reason? Not that I'm complaining.


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