RKMBs Forums .::Important::. RDCW Havok-The Challenge

*JE and the Otaku are in the ring.*

JE: James fantastic, you are an idiot. Weren't you watching last week? Didn't you see what we did? Do you think we're going to take it easy on you because it's your brother's first match? What is wrong with you? His first match and you're throwing him right into a match with the Otaku? There really are only two possibilities, there's the whole "you're an idiot" thing, or you hate your brother. You've been forced to take him on as a partner, and you're trying to get rid of him by putting him into a match with men who are ready, willing and able to END HIS DAMN CAREER BEFORE IT STARTS! Didn't you see the raw power of Big Fat Elvis? Didn't you witness the unbelievable speed and skill of Hiro? Don't you remember that they are lead by the evilest man ever to step into a wrestling ring?

Maybe we've made it too easy to forget. We were gone for a while and I admit we like to goof around and have a good time, but we also enjoy hurting people. We also enjoy making men who thought they were strong scream for mercy, and then showing none. So, maybe you have forgotten, but I assure you you won't forget after tonight. You won't forget when you visit your brother in a hospital and the best news the doctor can give you is "There's still a chance he could walk again." And, once your brother is being wheeled off to a hospital it'll be three...oh, I'm sorry. I mean two. Of course, it'll be two on one. I wouldn't DREAM of interfering in the match tonight.

There's still time. You can pull out of the match. No one would blame you. It wouldn't be cowardice, it would be the only course of action that isn't suicide. If you enter the ring, you will be crossing that thin line between bravery and stupidity. You can walk away and have me call you an idiot, or you can enter the ring and prove it.

*Their music starts up and they taunt the crowd.*

MarcuM: The Otaku are ready, but I doubt anyone could be ready for the Otaku!

Monroe: We'll be right back after a few words from Six Flags over Roboken. The Big Banana is back! Ride the Big Banana...again!

*We go to the commercial.*

This really doesn't explain what happened to the BattleWars Championship...

you cant talk unless u decide to join in and post something...

LALALALALALALALALALALA

heh...IGNORE ME!!

I think JLA just challenged Johnny Evil to a match next week.

he'll know where the belt is next week!

Only if it is for the BattleWars Championship...

The Battlewar championship can only be defended in matches where magical powers are allowed.

the BattleWar Championship is not recognized by this promotion!

that doesn't mean you're getting out of the match!

If it's for the belt, I'm in!

If it ain't for the belt, I'm afraid I may have to be naughty!

it's not for the belt. deal.

This may not end well for the RDCW board...

the mentor has spoken...

Take me out of the match or...

I'll be a whiny cunt!

JLA vs. Johnny Evil! no title!

'Money for Nothing' plays, and Charlie once again makes his way ou to the ring to the boos of the fans. He's clearly feeling the effects of his match last week, and is walking with a cane

Monroe: Charlie's definitely feeling the after-effects of Stairway to Hell!

Marcum: It's a dishrace! Charlie was screwed out of that title shot!

By this point Charlie is in the ring, but his attempts to speak are downed out by the fans' rapid booing

Charlie: Shut up and listen, you pencil-neck geeks, the big man's talking!

The fans booing finally subsides

Charlie: First thing's first: my match this week. Ghost Hog, I'm, frankly astonished that you can even spell hate, let alone understand the concept. Especially since you appear to have failed basic geography. This may have escaped your attention, but I'm from England, not Canada or the United Fages of America.

The crowd is clearly furious with Charlie and lets him know it as he smirks

Charlie: Well, come on! I mean, what with Killconey and Chewy Walrus single-handedly keeping the makes of KY Jelly in business, is it any wonder that this god-dman country is so fucking gay?

Anyway, Gay Hog, tonight, I'm gonna beat your ass, and not the way you like it. Tonight, you're walking the Pitbull Line, and that's never fun.

Marcum: Boy, is Ghost Hog in trouble!

Charlie: Now, onto some more important details. Last week, I was within inches of grabbing that contract for the title shot at Scammiversary, but know what? I got screwed by those two-bit ham-and-eggers The West Side Rollers. And you knopw what? It was a good thing. You know why? It taught me something.

There are bad men out there. Men who defy gentlemen's agreements and are only interested in personal gain.

Monroe: Some would say Charlie fits rather neatly into that category!

Marcum: Would you shut up?

Charlie: So, I went away, and I thought about it, and I realised what I needed. I needed somebody who could keep an eye on all of my interests, like back when I was being managed by the great Louie Bastardo. Sadly, Louie told me he was in retirement, but he offered me the personal services of someone who was a big help to him. So, back in the RDCW after a long and undesreved absence, Grace!

Grace appears on the ramp. She's dressed in a tight shirt and a miniskirt that shows off a scandlous amount of leg. She comes down to join Charlie in the ring, who openly ogles her

Charlie: Ain't she great?

Now, much as Grace is a girl of great brain- and even greater assets, if ya know what I mean- she ain't packing the kind of muscle I need to make sure my interests are protected. She'll be acting as my ringside advisor, but I need bodyguards. And I figured, what I need for a job like that, is a pair odf Bastards. English Bastards, in fact. So, here to act as my official bodyguards in the RDCW, The English Bastards!

Judas Priest's 'Breaking The Law' plays as The English Bastards make their way out. They're both huge, hulking men, well over 6 foot and built like the proverbial Brick Toilets.

Charlie: as you can see, these are not the kinda guys you wanna fuck with. So, let this serve as a warning to everyone of you back there in the locker-room: Fuck with me in any way, and these boys will put in the fuckin' hospital. No warnings, no second chances, no nothing. Notice has been served. Sammitch, you're top of my list. Ghost Hog, you're in my way. West Side Rollers, consider yourselves under sentence of death. The Pitbull is on the prowl, and there is gonna be a lot of trouble.

'Money for Nothing' plays, and Charlie and his posse head backstage, as we go to commercial.

Waking The Dead screams through the Cheesdome and Ghost Hog walks the ramp as smoke encircles his form almost stomping his way to the ring he enters and grabs the mic...

Marcum : Charlie just got him good. Hah...he's mad...he's a mad piggie.

Ghost Hog: The corn grows Charlie, it grows well from the fertile soil, it grows well from the soil beneath you. The soil I tilled with the sweat of my brow and the wringing of my hands. The corn grows still. Yes, I hate you Charlie, but then again everyone hates you. But I won't need to hate you anymore Charlie, not whne the corn rises from the earth strewn above your casket from the grave I created for you. I will burrry youuuu Charlie.

Marcum: Whatta corny guy. ya, know corn is one of the hog's favorite foods.

Monroe: I did not know that.....ahemmmm.


Ghost Hog: I will husk your little boys Charlie. I will tear them limb from limb, I will grind their bones to powder, and it will make your soil even more nurtured and fertile.After I beat you down the corn will rise and I will shuck it, and each time you rise from defeat I will tear and wrench you and burn you and bury you again. I will put you in a casket and launch it to hell, Charlie, because the corn grows and it grows more sweet with my hatred....

GH slams the mic...

Marcum: What did he say, he made me hungry...???

Video comes across the Cheesedome screens of Ex-Officer Schwarz.
She stands looking at herself in a full length mirror eyeing her fetching wardrobe....tight tight shorts, knotted dress shirt showing her middriff and a visible bra, and she grinds her leather, knee high boots as she smooths her legs, and she gives a smile of approval to the mirror...

Schwarz: I think Tim will like this just fine.....


Monroe: what, Schwarz is what????


Cut............

*Balls Nasty, in street clothes, is caught by Robin Lucious as he enters the Cheesedome.*

RL: Balls Nasty, why did you attack Chewy Walrus on the last Havok?

BN: Are you new? Did you get a job in the RDCW without knowing a damn thing about wrestling? Why did I attack Chewy Walrus? For the simplest, most common reason a wrestler attacks another wrestler. Retribution. Chubby Walrus almost ended my career when he fell on top of me from the Cheesedome balcony. So I'm back now to return the favor.

RL: And how are you preparing for your match tonight with Chewy's tag partner, Killconey?

BN: Preparing? I only prepare for matches against people who have even the slimmest chance of defeating me. This Chili Cheese Coney clown isn't worth the effort. The only reason this loser is even getting in the ring with me tonight is because Chubby's head seems to be as soft as his belly. So, in his absence, I'm going to tear apart his little girlfriend here on national broadcast. I hope that little hospital room you're in has a TV, Walrus, because I want you to see this. I want you to see what awaits you once you waddle your fat ass out of that hospital and back into the Cheesedome.

*Balls Nasty pushes past Robin and into his locker room.*

RL: Back to you Mike and Madman.

Cut back to ringside. Joe Mama is in the ring with a microphone. As "Faded" ends, Joe Mama addresses the crowd...

JM: Before I discuss my match tonight, I want to quickly address the events of last week. First of all, I have to congratulate Captain Sammitch on his victory. The odds were stacked heavily against him, and he was the last person I thought would be able to survive (much less win) that style of match, but he pulled it off. Granted, he seemed to dodge certain competitors, and all he's won is the opportunity to have his career cut brutally short, but those are thoughts for another time. Sooner, rather than later, but still: congratulations Sammitch. You deserve your due.

The crowd cheers...

Marcum: How magnanimous of the Champion to recognize Sammitch's victory in last week's Stairway To Hell Match!

Monroe: Sounded kind of backhanded to me, Marcum...

JM: I also have to give credit where it's due: Krazed, your actions last week impressed me. Sure, your plan to take me out failed miserably. And, sure, you chose to lose a battle over potentially winning a war by throwing away your shot at the Heavyweight Cheese Title in favor of catching a beatdown at my hands. But, in your stupidity, you showed a lot of guts. Granted, it didn't make any difference - I mean, you get no title shot, you got beat by five people in the ring and by me out of the ring. You you can rest comfortably in the moral victory that comes from knowing that I don't think you're COMPLETELY worthless...just mostly worthless. You glorified jobber.

Marcum: That had to sting Krazed a bit...

JM: And from Krazed, we move on to his partner, confidante, and my opponent for tonight - Big Pimp Tim. Now, Timothy, you came just this close to having a title shot. That impresses me even more than your (domestic) partner's actions last week. Instead of running away from an inevitable beating like Krazed did, you chose to fight four other men in hopes of getting a shot at the gold. It's clear who has the brains of your team, and I salute you for that.

Of course, that doesn't change the fact that I tossed your useless ass over the top rope not too long ago. And it doesn't change the fact that you cried like a little bitch a week later. "I don't want the title, I just want my revenge...wah! Waaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!" Pathetic. As a matter of fact, I'm surprised that you actually signed on for this match. I figured you wrestle some midgets, then an old lady or two. You know, build up your pride before you faced off against some real competition. But, once again, you surprised me. So, out of appreciation for the nerve and perseverance you've shown recently, let me tell you what's going to happen in tonight's Over The Top Rope Challenge. First, I'm going to beat the unholy hell out of you. I'll probably get you outside the ring and put you through a table or two. Don't be surprised if I use a mix of East Coast Hammers and Bay State Sledges to...heh...soften you up. And keep an eye out for Loosie to make an appearance. You know, for the true fans. Finally, Timberley, expect me to ONCE AGAIN(!!!) toss your punk ass over the top rope!

The theme to Superman suddenly plays as Joe Mama mimes grabbing someone by the scruff of the neck and belt loop, running across the ring, and "throwing him" over the top rope. He stares off into the distance, shielding his eyes as he "watches something move off into the horizon". The crowd laughs and cheers and the music fades out.

JM: Tonight, the fans will believe a Pimp can fly!!!

"Faded" plays again. Joe Mama plays to the crowd a little, then turns to the camera and soundless says, Tim...tonight I'm taking you out!!! Then he leaves the ring and walks to the back.

backstage, bpt is relaxed, smiling



bpt: i see jm finds this funny. good. i want him relaxed. at ease. doesn't change anything, but he is amusing.


bpt: more importantly, does the assclown do parties? i don't see his career going much farther after tonight. sure, he will be champ, but what good is championships if your lieing broken on the stone cold floor, title tossed on your unconsious body.


bpt: sammitch, you can have it, but your time will come. like all the others.
i am cleaning house, so you and everyuone else can accept it, and get me a soda, or fight it, and just watch jm to see what that'll get you.

watching a replay of jm again, smiling and shaklking his head, fading to black

<The guitar hook from 'Peace Of Mind' plays and the crowd leaps to its feet as Captain Sammitch makes his way to the ring...>

Marcum: Now why is he wasting our time out here? He's not even scheduled to wrestle tonight!

Monroe: I would answer you with the all-powerful eye-rolling graemlin, but it appears Rob neglected to pay the graemlin bill this month!

Captain Sammitch: Good evening, everyone! <Pops from the crowd...> I know I'm not due to wrestle tonight, so I'll keep it brief. You may wonder why Killconey hasn't made an appearance - long story short, I advised him not to.

Marcum: That's a good idea! Killconey wouldn't even last long enough in the ring to talk trash to Balls Nasty!

CS: As much as he would have enjoyed a chance to set things straight with a certain post-retirement 'contender', Killconey's time prior to tonight's match, in my opinion, would be much better spent preparing mentally and physically for the match itself, not to mention spending time with his wife and checking in on Chewy Walrus - who by the way is doing much better. I would like to briefly address the incident which transpired last Havok myself, however. While I generally don't go in for personal attacks, one has to wonder about the intestinal fortitude of a fomer RDCW superstar who is so confident about coming out of retirement that he finds it necessary to show what he's capable of in the form of bush-league cheap shots against victims at unawares.

Monroe: Whoa!

Marcum: Hey! He can't talk about the living legend Balls Nasty like that!

CS: But I digress. While I'm looking forward to Killconey turning in a solid performance in the ring tonight, I'd be lying if I didn't admit I'm already thinking ahead to Scammiversary. Thanks to the support of all of you fantastic fans out there, I will have the opportunity to fight for the one title that's eluded me ever since I came to the RDCW - The Heavyweight Cheese Championship!

<Pops from the crowd, and sporadic chanting of Sammitch's name...>

Marcum: Would someone please tell this clown he doesn't stand a chance?

CS: And as thrilled as I am about having a shot at the title, I couldn't be more satisfied with the choice of opponent. It's no secret that there's quite a bit of history between Joe Mama and myself. We've beaten the hell out of each other more times than I care to count, and although he certainly may have seemed pretty nonchalant about our approaching battle earlier tonight, if the truth were known, you'd see that our friend Joe is more than a little nervous. He never expected me to come out of the Stairway To Hell in one piece, let alone emerge victorious!

Marcum: Neither did we!

CS: And if I'm capable of winning a match against five outstanding competitors - no, I didn't have to individually destroy all five to win the match, but I'm here and they're not - what else might I be capable of? We know what Joe Mama's capable of. You'd have to be a fool not to respect his natural fighting ability and his thirst for violence. But I seem to be full of surprises these days.

Marcum: Full of something, that's for sure!

Monroe:

CS: And while the past might encourage some to put their money on Joe Mama, anyone willing to see should be able to tell that the RDCW, and Joe Mama, and myself, have each turned a corner. The future of the RDCW is now, and I intend, for the sake of each and every fan in here, to make my mark on that future. Stay tuned.

<Huge pops from the crowd as 'Peace Of Mind' plays and Captain Sammitch exits the ring and heads up the ramp and out of the arena...>

Opening Tag Match

The Otaku vs. The Fantastic Brothers

*upcoming*

Grudge Challenge

Balls Nasty vs. Killconey w/Sweet Marlene

"TNT" cues up as Killconey and Sweet Marlene enter the arena. No jokes this week, no funny impersonations. He's all business and out to avenge his friend, Chewy Walrus.

"Bad Company" then begins to play as Balls Nasty enters the arena.

Monroe: It's been almost two years since Balls was injured in a hardcore match, Madman!

MarcuM: I never thought we'd see him in a ring again. What a testiment to his testiculosity!

Monroe: His whut???

The bell rings, and Killconey goes into a flurry of martial arts kicks and strikes. All is going his way until he attempts a flying body tackle off the ropes. Balls Nasty catches him in mid-air with a drop kick that sends Killconey crashing to the mat. Nasty then pulls Killconey up off the mat by the hair and begins to punch the side of his head. The ref warns Nasty about grabbing the hair and closed fist punches. Nasty shrugs him off and moves Killconey over to the ropes to begin choking him.

As Sweet Marlene is yelling at Balls from outside the ring, Nasty curses her out and spits on her face. She gets angry and climbs into the ring. The ref is holding her back. With the ref distracted, Nasty pulls out a set of brass knuckles and smashes it into Killconey's face as he attempted to pull himself up from the mat. Nasty quickly hides the knucks back into his trunks and gets the ref's attention in time to get the three count.

Sweet Marlene rushes into the ring to attend to Killconey. Nasty returns to the ring with two steel chairs. Marlene tries to keep him away from Killconey, but Nasty just pushes her out of the way. He then drags Killconey to the corner and positions a chair sideways in the middle of the turnbuckle. He places Killconey's knee up against the chair and ties his foot in the rope. Then, Nasty takes the other chair and uses the ropes to hold it against the the front of Killconey's knees.

Monroe: What is he doing here?

Marcum: He's sending a message to Killconey. And that message is to stay out of his way.

Nasty goes to the other corner and runs across the ring. As he approaches, he jumps up off the ground and dropkicks the chair straight into Killconey's knees. Killconey cries out in pain.

The referee calls for the bell again and informs Nasty that he's been disqualified, but Balls picks him up and drops him with a Tavernsmasher!

Nasty calls for a mike and gets right up into a camera.

Balls Nasty: See that, Walrus? There's more of that for all your friends here. You want it to stop? Drag your sorry ass out of that hospital bed and to Scammiversary. I'll be waiting for you here, in the ring, surrounded by a steel cage. We'll finish this once and for all.

Captain Sammitch runs down to ringside to check on Killconey as Balls nonchalantly backs away with a smirk on his face, before dropping the mike and exiting the ring.

Falls Count Anywhere

Million $ Pitbull Charlie vs. Ghost Hog

*upcoming*

Over the Top Rope Challenge

Joe Mama vs. Big Pimp Tim

*upcoming*

Opening Tag Match

The Otaku vs. The Fantastic Brothers

*upcoming*


The Otaku took advantage of Ryan Fantastic's inexperience, easily manipulating him into hurting his own team. He kept getting caught trying to enter the ring, trying to break up a double team or protest outside interference and that just allowed Johnny Evil to take a more active hand in the match. With all of the interference and Ryan being effectively kept out of the match, it was practically three on one, and the Otaku celebrated a relatively easy victory by attacking both of the Fantastic brothers after the match.

Falls Count Anywhere

Ghost Hog vs. Charlie

These two brawled throughout the Cheesedome in an exciting match! Several times, Grace instructed the English Bastards to interfere, but Charlie held them back and informed them to watch for outside interference.

Ghost Hog and Charlie fought back to the dressing rooms, and it seemed Charlie had the upper hand, when a door opened and Schwarz peered out, looking at Ghost Hog. Ghost Hog noticed her and gained a surge in energy and caught Charlie with a Schwein Slop Suplex on the floor!

Following this Ghost Hog hit a Pork U through a backstage table for the three count! The English Bastards rushed in to attack, but Ghost Hog lost them in the backstage area!

Over the Top Rope Challenge
Joe Mama vs. Big Pimp Tim


For those of you who are wondering, he beat me clean. I attempted to keep the tempo of the match slow to frustrate BPT and force him to make a mistake. Once it became clear that the strategy wasn't going to work, the match because a pure brawl. There were several near misses as we almost got each other over the top rope. Finally, I had the advantage long enough that it looked like Tim was - once again - going over. But Tim had the good sense to grab a hold of me and we both went over. We each had a hold of the top rope and were struggling to keep our feet of the floor. Tim recovered enough so that his kicks to my ribs and gut were enough to make me let go. As Tim celebrated in the ring, and the commentators wondered what this would mean in my match against Captain Sammitch, and Don West tried to sell Barry Bonds cards to a ten-year-old in the stands, I took a moment to show my respect and then prepared to leave the ring area.

But Krazed and J appeared on the rampway as Krazed, mic in hand, began verbally running down the RDCW Champion. Joe Mama threw the belt down and began tearing into Krazed with closed fist punches to the head! They fought on the rampway as J and Big Pimp Tim joined in the assault on the champion!

MarcuM: WEST SAAAAIIIIIIDEEE!!!!!!!

Monroe: Would you stop?!

The three on one attack continued, until Grimm and Captain Sammitch ran out, chairs in hand and cleared away the attackers! Grimm continued chasing the WSR to the back as Captain Sammitch picked up the discarded belt and prepared to hand it to JM!

JM snatched the belt, but Sammitch held onto it as the two men went nose to nose!

The camera faded out on the scene as Havoc went off the air!