RKMBs Forums .::Important::. off topic and offensive posts An open letter to Mr. JLA

Dear Mr. JLA,

I currently am sitting by the fireplace thinking back down that long road we humans call memory. I wonder what you are up to as you read this. Are you wrist deep in a ten-year old boy whom you convinced to get into your car? Are you enjoying a spoonful of your own shit (piping hot I'd wager) or are you in another one of your masturbatory sessions with your seven cats?

Just the other day I ran into Randal, you do remember Randal? He remembers you, and what you did to his beloved grandmother (I don't think she sat down for a month, but oh well she was willing).
How are Hannah and Maryanne? I hear sheep bite if you're not careful with them so I hope your "genitals" don't fall victim to their maws.

Hope to hear from you soon,
R3x29yz4a

P.S. Comic books are swell (so this is on-topic for the comic forum)

It's true, comic books are swell.

r33ejhx29efkyz4a:

You sir, are a bottom feeding scum sucking lowlife punk motherfucker.

You don't even have a fireplace. You just like to pretend you have one while you huddle before one of those steel garbage cans with a fire burning within it, with your fellow homeless drug addicted male prostitutes.

Next time you ask me for spare change, I will promptly bury my foot in your mouth, knocking out your two remaining teeth. Knowing you, you'll turn being a toothless prick to your advantage, since you'll be able to "gum" your johns while you blow them for food stamps.

And if I catch you stealing my morning newspaper again, I'll call the police, and enjoy watching them club you bloody with their nightsticks. Hopefully next time, they will break out their tasers and mase. God knows you deserve it.

I know you use the paper for a blanket, but too bad. Set aside 35 cents out of your crack budget, and get your own.

I'm glad Mr JLA and r3x29yz4a kept this on-topic and clearly are keen to talk comics. I was personally waiting for this thread to turn to the merits of capes on superheroes in real life battles.

Unfortunately, Mxy has used the word "swell", obviously referring to an erect penis, and so I'm going to have to move this thread to offtopic/offensive.

Mxy, you should be ashamed of yourself for spoiling the fun for everyone. I want you to stand in front of a mirror, drop your pants, lift your foot up over your shoulder and kick yourself in the arse.

I'll give it a few more minutes so everyone can get in some last minute venting before I move it.

I wish you would keep it here, Dave.

After all, this is the forum that rx8073yzaiui or whatever his name is used to moderate.

Not anymore, thanks to me!

SUCK ON THAT RXBITCH!

I just received this private message from Mr JLA:

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rx and I are have a running gag where we pretend to fight and send each other nasty pm's. I thought that was a little obvious.

I actually think he's funny, and like when he messes with me.

We are actually gay lovers.

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You both should know that online homosexual foreplay takles place in the Robblemania forum, not here.

I will move this thread accordingly, unless you both starting talking about your erotic superhero fetishes and how you'd like to have sex with Batman - whereupon this thread will again become ontopic.

too late!

Class: 41 Entertainment; sporting and cultural activities; arranging, conducting, managing, and hosting of conferences, conventions, exhibitions, fairs, concerts, meetings, sporting and cultural activities; providing information in relation to the planning and arranging of conferences, conventions, exhibitions, fairs, concerts, meetings, sporting and cultural activities; rental of concert, convention, exhibition and conference facilities and equipment

Another PM from Mr JLA:

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Thanks for ruining the joke

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Bite me, you pathetic piece of jailbait, and fuck the lame donkey you rode in on with your own flaccid penis - assuming you have one, which is something which not even Stephen Hawkings with a very big calculator could calculate the probability of, and assuming that it works, which is so remote that I would think it is more likely that there is a planet orbiting the star Polaris inhabited by winged clones of Angelina Jolie with tattoos reading "Mr JLA is a Sex God" printed over their inner thighs.

Not very likely in other words.

I never wrote any of that stuff.

I wouldn't send Dave a PM to save his ambulance chasing life.

Honest.

I'm surprised you don't have more typos, or is your butthole so loose that the prison sex doesn't ruin your concentration?

And Captain America sucks. Take that, JLA!

OK, I'm moving this now.

Another PM:

Quote:

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I never send you PM's!

Here's the proof!

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Now you're off topic. Goodbye.

Why you little...!

Exchange fo e-mails with MrJLA:

Mr JLA:

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I don't ever want to be a moderator at Rob's boards again.

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Me:

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Wheeeee!

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Mr JLA:

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Really. I don't know how you do it.





I don't want to be a mod here at Rob's boards.





Ever.

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Me:

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And you were the front runner in the secret discussions for the new moderator on the off topic board....



I'll let the guys know you're not interested.

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Mr JLA:

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You were supposed to cut and paste this in the rx thread, and then I could use reverse psychology... oh forget it.

I'm tired and can't be arsed to play your wicked games!

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I win!

I do in fact own a fireplace.

sure r2d2 sure

Dear Uschi,

You are tired. Go get the hell to bed.

Love always,
Uschi

Dear uschi,

Only psychos talk to themselves.

Sincerely,
Everyone

Dear Rex,

my dog likes to eat my underwear when I don't get it into the laundry hamper.

Love Always,
Uschi

Dear Uschi,

Some people don't want to know that.

Sincerlely
Rex.

get a room

The dog isn't eating it. He's retrieving it for Pariah, he has a large collection now.

Dear Stevie T

Go fuck yourself.

Signed,
Pariah

That's not a denial.

And I know you love me really.

What kind of a lowlife would waste their time sending a private message to Dave?

Those are obvious forgeries, and evidence that Dave wants to be like me so bad, his johnson tingles whenever he thinks of me, which is quite often!

I send private stuff to Davie all the time.

I send "private messages" to "Dave" all the "time".

He is a handsome devil!

HOMO!

"- The one I just hate is when I'm just an actor on a strange television version of my life. Have you ever had that dream?
- Doesn't everyone?"
/Clark Kent to Batman, in The Wake.

Frank Burns REALLY REALLY likes Mr. GayLA.

I'm jealous.

I can't wait for you forever!

And after he gave you his promise-ring, you unfaithful bastard!

Someone delete this thread, I don't want anyone to see it.

Oops.

This thread is off topic for this forum.

Presactly.