Stranger: Jesus?
You: yes?
You: who is it?
Stranger: is it really you?
You: what do you want?
You: yeah
Stranger: its me
You: what do you want?
You: who?
You: look im busy
Stranger: dont you know everything?
Stranger: dont you already know what I want?
You: ugh no
You: that's racist
Stranger: you are everywhere and nowhere
You: just because im jesus i have to know everything?
Stranger: you are was and will be
You: no, that's my dad
You: look no
You: that's
You: ugh
You: that's ignorant
Stranger: you dad and holy spirit are all in one
You: and offensive
Stranger: what the fuck, I've been LIED TO
Stranger: fuck you
You: no edward.
You: you've just missunderstood what they tell you
Stranger: AAAAAAAAH dont call me that!
You: they were perfectly clear
You: look, edward
You: is there anything you want?
You: i'm busy
Stranger: I want to know ...
You: there are about 134 million people trying to talk to me right now
You: so spit it out ok?
Stranger: I'm not sure how to ask
You: just do it
You: for fuck's sake
You: look i can't be here all day
You: if you don't say it I'll go away
Stranger: what have you got to do you are dead anyways
Stranger: I want to know if you like pandas
You: look
You: dead people are people too
You: pandas?
Stranger: yes pandas
You: what the fuck is a panda?
Stranger: a fucking black bear with white spots
Stranger: or a fucking white bear with black spots
Stranger: jesus fucking christ
You: what? it's a sex act with a bear?
You: LOOK!
You: that's not my name!
Stranger: oops that slipepd sorry
Stranger: !
You: my middle name is horatio!
You: not fucking!
You: anyways
Stranger: \:\(
You: to answer your question
Stranger: ok, I really want to know why I have a small penis
You: no, I do not like to fuck bears
You: white or otherwise
You: you have a small penis because you fuck bears
Stranger: I dont fuck bears
You: have you given oral sex to a bear?
You: there you go
Stranger: that was a "breaking the ice" question
You: what?
Stranger: you mean I should?
You: well yeah
Stranger: ho wmany times do I get to talk to god?
You: once
Stranger: you m ean I can just walk in and ask "why do I haev a small penis?"
You: then you're fucked
Stranger: are you insane

You: no, I'm dead
Stranger: touche
You: look is there anything else?
Stranger: so back to the penis
You: ok...
Stranger: I WANT A BLACK COCK GOD DAMN IT
You: ah what the hell
Stranger: actually, make it a horse cock
You: too late
Stranger: snap
You: I already gave you a black cock
Stranger: AH!
You: check your ass
Stranger: it is you!
You: LOL!
You: OMG
Stranger: LOL damn!
Stranger: HAHAHAH
You: LOL!
Stranger: HAHAHAH
You: no really.
Stranger: damn dude I want expecting that
You: check your ass.
Stranger: lol wtf
Stranger: hHAHAHAHAHAH
You: go ahead.
You: you won't be laughing so hard.