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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 4,069
Public Enemy #4 4000+ posts
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Public Enemy #4 4000+ posts
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 4,069 |
Yo mama so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up
Yo mama so fat her nickname is "Lardo"
Yo mama so fat she eats Wheat Thicks.
Yo mama so fat were in her right now
Yo mama so fat people jog around her for exercise
Yo mama so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone
Yo mama so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors
Yo mamma so fat you haveta roll over twice to get off her...
Yo mama so fat she was floating in the ocean and spain claimed her for then new world
Yo mama so fat she lay on the beach and people run around yelling Free Willy
Yo mama so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop!
Yo mama so fat when she has wants someone to shake her hand, she has to give directions!
Yo mama so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"
Yo mama so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said "Taxi!"
Yo mama so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized
Yo mama so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway
Yo mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller
Yo mama so fat she got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets
Yo mama so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave, she landed on 12th
Yo mama so fat when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too
Yo mama so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"
Yo mama so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!
Yo mama so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"
Yo mama so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.
Yo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it.
Yo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.
Yo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says we don't do livestock.
Yo mama so fat her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs!
Yo mama so fat she's got her own area code!
Yo mama so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon!
Yo mama so fat God couldn't light Earth until she moved!
Yo mama so fat NASA has to orbit a satellite around her!
Yo mama so fat whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in!
Yo mama so fat when she plays hopscotch, she goes New York, L.A., Chicago...
Yo mama so fat she's got Amtrak written on her leg.
Yo mama so fat even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction!
Yo mama so fat her legs is like spoiled milk - white & chunky!
Yo mama so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the her good side!
Yo mama so fat she wakes up in sections!
Yo mama so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER!
Yo mama so fat she sat on a quarter and a booger shot out of george washington's nose.
Yo mama so fat she rolled over 4 quarters and it made a dollar!
Yo mama so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun!
Yo mama so fat when she bunje jumps she goes straight to hell!
Yo mama so fat when she jumps up in the air she gets stuck!!!
Yo mama so fat she's got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book!
Yo mama so fat that her senior pictures had to be arial views!
Yo mama so fat she's on both sides of the family!
Yo mama so fat everytime she walks in high heels, she strikes oil!
Yo mama so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon!
Yo mama so fat she sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw her in!
Yo mama so fat even her clothes have stretch marks!
Yo mama so fat she has a wooden leg with a kickstand!
Yo mama so fat she has to use a VCR as a beeper!
Yo mama so fat she broke her leg, and gravy poured out!
Yo mama so fat when she rides in a hot air balloon, it looks like she's wearin tights!
Yo mama so fat she got hit by a parked car!
Yo mama so fat they have to grease the bath tub to get her out!
Yo mama so fat she has a run in her blue-jeans!
Yo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.
Yo mama so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat people say "Taxi!"
Yo mama so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway!
Yo mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller!
Yo mama so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave she landed on 12th
Yo mama so fat when she bungee jumps she pulls down the bridge too
Yo mama so fat she steps on a scale & it goes one at a time please
Yo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it!
Yo mama so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck!
Yo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it.
Yo mama so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.
Yo mama so fat they use the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping
Yo mama so fat when they used her underwear elastic for bungee jumping, they hit the ground.
Yo mama so fat when she back up she beep.
Yo mama so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck.
Yo mama so fat she has to buy two airline tickets.
Yo mama so fat when she fell over she rocked herself asleep trying to get up again.
Yo mama so fat she influences the tides.
Yo mama so fat that when I tried to drive around her I ran out of gas.
Yo mama so fat she broke her leg and gravy fell out.
Yo mama so fat the animals at the zoo feed her.
Yo mama so fat she was baptized at Marine World.
Yo mama so fat she's on both sides of the family!
Yo mama so fat when she dances at a concert the whole band skips.
Yo mama so fat the Aids quilt wouldn't cover her
Yo mama so fat she stands in two time zones.
Yo mama so fat I tried to drive around her and I ran out of gas.
Yo mama so fat she left the house in high heels and when she came back she had on flip flops.
Yo mama so fat shes on both sides of the family
Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through
Yo mama so fat when she goes to an all you can eat buffet, they have to install speed bumps.
Yo mama so fat that she cant tie her own shoes.
Yo mama so fat sets off car alarms when she runs.
Yo mama so fat she cant reach her back pocket.
Yo mama so fat when she wears one of those X jackets, helicopters try to land on her back!
Yo mama so fat her college graduation picture was an airial.
Yo mama so fat she lays on the beach and greenpeace tried to push her back in the water
Yo mama so fat she broke her leg and gravy poured out
Yo mama so fat she uses redwoods to pick her teeth
Yo mama so fat the only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures
Yo mama so fat she jumped in the air and got stuck.
Yo mama so fat she put on some BVD's and by the time they reached her waist they spelled out boulevard.
Yo mama so fat she sat on a dollar and squeezed a booger out George Washington's nose.
Yo mama so fat she stepped on a rainbow and made Skittles.
Yo mama so fat she uses a mattress for a tampon.
Yo mama so fat that when she sits on the beach, Greenpeace shows up and tries to tow her back into the ocean.....
Yo mama so fat that she would have been in E.T., but when she rode the bike across the moon, she caused an eclipse.
Yo mama so fat she hoola-hooped the super bowl.
Yo mama so fat she was baptised in the ocean.
Yo mama so fat she has to iron her clothes in the driveway.
Yo mama so fat they tie a rope around her shoulders and drag her through a tunnel when they want to clean it.
Yo mama so fat when she got hit by a bus, she said, "Who threw that rock?"
Yo mama so fat when she stands in a left-turn lane it gives her the green arrow!
Yo mama so fat that when whe was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks.
Yo mama so fat we went to the drive-in and didn't have to pay because we dressed her as a Chevrolet.
Oderint, dum metuant.
You are a god damned idiot, you know that? You ought to be smacked upside your dumb-fuck head, even after all these years. Shame on you! -USCHI showin' some love
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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 4,069
Public Enemy #4 4000+ posts
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Public Enemy #4 4000+ posts
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 4,069 |
Yo mama so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes
Yo mama so stupid when she saw the NC-17 (under 17 not admitted) sign, she went home and got 16 friends
Yo mama so stupid when your dad said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a spoon
Yo mama so stupid she told everyone that she was "illegitiment" because she couldn't read
Yo mama so stupid that she puts lipstick on her head just to make-up her mind
Yo mama so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl
Yo mama so stupid you have to dig for her IQ!
Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!
Yo mama so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes!
Yo mama so stupid that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order!
Yo mama so stupid she could trip over a cordless phone!
Yo mama so stupid she sold her car for gasoline money!
Yo mama so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight!
Yo mama so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund!
Yo mama so stupid she took a cup to see Juice.
Yo mama so stupid that she sold the car for gas money.
Yo mama so stupid she asked you "What is the number for 911"
Yo mama so stupid she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
Yo mama so stupid when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put "O.K."
Yo mama so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot out.
Yo mama so stupid she stole free bread.
Yo mama so stupid she took a spoon to the superbowl.
Yo mama so stupid she called Dan Quayle for a spell check.
Yo mama so stupid she stepped on a crack and broke her own back.
Yo mama so stupid she makes Beavis and Butt-Head look like Nobel Prize winners.
Yo mama so stupid she thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train.
Yo mama so stupid she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif.
Yo mama so stupid when you stand next to her you hear the ocean!
Yo mama so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl
Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!
Yo mama so stupid she thinks Fleetwood Mac is a new hamburger at McDonalds!
Yo mama so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch!
Yo mama so stupid that she thought Boyz II Men was a day care center.
Yo mama so stupid she bought a videocamera to record cable tv shows at home.
Yo mama so stupid when she went to take the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead.
Yo mama so stupid she jumped out the window and went up.
Yo mama so stupid she thought a quarterback was an income tax refund.
Yo mama so stupid she took a umbrella to see Purple Rain.
Yo mama so stupid that under "Education" on her job apllication, she put "Hooked on Phonics."
Yo mama so stupid she put out the cigarette butt that was heating your house.
Yo mama so stupid she put lipstick on her forehead, talking about she was trying to makeup her mind.
Yo mama so stupid she watches "The Three Stooges" and takes notes.
Oderint, dum metuant.
You are a god damned idiot, you know that? You ought to be smacked upside your dumb-fuck head, even after all these years. Shame on you! -USCHI showin' some love
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Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 17,801
terrible podcaster 15000+ posts
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terrible podcaster 15000+ posts
Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 17,801 |
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Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 24,106 Likes: 1
faggot 15000+ posts
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faggot 15000+ posts
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 24,106 Likes: 1 |
Yo Mama so loose, Paris Hilton calls her a ho!
Old men, fear me! You will shatter under my ruthless apathetic assault!
Uschi - 2
Old Men - 0
"I am convinced that this world is of no importance, and that the only people who care about dates are imbeciles and Spanish teachers." -- Jean Arp, 1921
"If Jesus came back and saw what people are doing in his name, he would never never stop throwing up." - Max von Sydow, "Hannah and Her Sisters"
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Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 10,539
I'm just sayin' 10000+ posts
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I'm just sayin' 10000+ posts
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 10,539 |
It's a dog eat dog world & I'm wearing milkbone underwear.
I can get you a toe.
1,999,999+ points.
Damn you and your lemonade!!
Booooooooooooooobs.
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 46,308
Who will I break next? 15000+ posts
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Who will I break next? 15000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 46,308 |
Yo Mama so fat, sammitch wants to fuck her.
November 6th, 2012: Americas new Independence Day.
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Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 17,801
terrible podcaster 15000+ posts
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terrible podcaster 15000+ posts
Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 17,801 |
 BURN!
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
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The alt 15000+ posts
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Posts: 18,158 |
A recent government survey showed that at least 36 states are anticipating local, regional, or statewide water shortages by 2013. (EPA, 2008)
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
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The alt 15000+ posts
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Posts: 18,158 |
All God's People
Queen
So all you people give freely
Make welcome inside your homes
Thank God you people give freely
Don't turn your back on the lesson of the Lord
All prime ministers (yeah) and majesty around the world
Open your eyes look touch and feel
Rule with your heart (rule with your heart )
Live with your conscience (live with your conscience)
And love love
Love love and be
Love love and be free
We're all God's people (we're all God's people)
Gotta face up
Better grow up
Gotta stand tall and be strong
Gotta face up
Better grow up
Gotta face up
Better grow up
Gotta stand tall and be strong
Gotta face up
Better grow up
We're all God's people
(Gotta face up)
(Better grow up)
(Gotta face up)
(Better grow up)
Yeah
Yeah - yeah - yes there was this magic light
I said to myself
I'd better go to bed and have an early night
Then I then I then I then I went into a dream
Rule with your heart and live with your conscience
We're all God's people give freely (yeah)
Make welcome inside your homes
Let us be thankful, He's so incredible
We're all God's
We're all God's
We're all God's
We're all God's people
We're all God's
We're all God's people
We're all God's people
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
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The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
baseball 20
The turn of the century brought another challenger, the American League, which started play in 1901. They raided most of the National League’s best players. In their attempt to meet the challenge, the National League owners turned on each other. A court injunction impaneled a three-man commission to run the league, and they found a way for the two-leagues to co-exist peacefully. Through the first decade of the twentieth century, baseball remained a game of strategy. The so-called “dead ball” provided few homeruns. The game relied on contact-hitters, bunting, and base-stealing for its offense. The adoption of a ball with a cork center in 1911 change the game dramatically. Forty years of batting records began to fall, and the popularity of the game began to explode.
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
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The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
They asked me why I was wearing heels, and I said, I'm trying to hide my ass. They gave me a prosthetic behind.
Michael Rosenbaum
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
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The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
List of action verbs starting with O
Observe
Obtain
Officiate
Offset
Operate
Orchestrate
Order
Organize
Orient
Orientate
Originate
Outline
Overhaul
Oversaw
Oversee
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
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The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
Beer Myth 2: The darker the beer, the more alcohol it contains
Not even close. Guinness is black, and has 4.2% alcohol. The color of a beer comes from the toasted malts, which has no effect on alcohol content. Ingredients like rice syrup, honey, and corn syrup add alcohol to beer, but do not influence the color.
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
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The alt 15000+ posts
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Posts: 18,158 |
• Strong hurricanes, droughts, heat waves, wildfires, and other natural disasters may become commonplace in many parts of the world. The growth of deserts may also cause food shortages in many places.
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Joined: Aug 2004
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The alt 15000+ posts
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The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
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The alt 15000+ posts
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Posts: 18,158 |
Why don't mexicans cross the border in 3's?
Because it says no trespassing
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
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The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
"Sarah Palin has admitted she tried marijuana several years ago, but she did not like it. She said it distorted her perceptions, impaired her thinking, and she's hoping that the effects will eventually wear off." –Jay Leno
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
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The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
"I was talking to a lady here in the audience, she was from Alaska and we were wondering about this. How does a thing like this work? She steps down and she's no longer the governor of Alaska. And we figured it out: Miss Congeniality steps up and is now the governor of Alaska." --David Letterman
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
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The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
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The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
Don't Move
Non ti muovere
(2004) NR
As Timoteo (Sergio Castellitto, who also directs) waits in agony to hear whether his 15-year-old daughter will live through a surgery, he can't help but recall his past mistakes, including the adulterous affair he had with a young, docile beauty named Italia (Penélope Cruz). Based on Margaret Mazzarini's novel, the drama was nominated for 11 Davids, Italy's film awards, scoring Best Actress and Best Actor honors for Cruz and Castellito.
Genre:Foreign Romance, Italy, Foreign Dramas
Format:DVD
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
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The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
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The alt 15000+ posts
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Posts: 18,158 |
I have never been afraid of making patriots; but I disdain and despise all their efforts.
Robert Walpole
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
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The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
Q: Why did General Motors end their sponsorship deal with Tiger Woods?
A: Tiger Woods is successful, competitive, and popular. And that's not the image GM is trying to portray!
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