The Chanterator: 10,000 Medieval Soldiers, 500 Amazonian Librarians and three Privates charge at The Chanterator.

Private Parts: No they bloody well don't!

The Chanterator: Wha!?! But you have too...

Private Property: Why?

The Chanterator: Because I said.

Private Screening: If you think we're stupid enough to change at someone who make a farmhouse instantly disappear, you've got another thing coming, mate.

Privates Parts and Property, 500 librarians and 10,000 medieval soldiers: Yeah!

The Chanterator: Look, how about I make it fair for you.

The Privates: Oh yeah...?

The Chanterator: The Chanterator produces a piece of parchment and an old-fashioned quill pen. He starts scribbling like mad. After a few minutes he finishes with a flourish and hands the parchment to the three Privates.

The Privates cautiously take the parchment and start to read.

Private Parts: Hmmm....

Private Property: mmmm....

Private Screening: uh huh.

Colon-El of the Chantanian Army: What's it say?

Gladys the Amazonian Librarian: Shhh. Let them finish.

Private Parts: Well it all seems in order...

Private Property: He says he'll give us a couple of posts to battle his robotic mail minions while he deals with the JLR.

Colon-El: Sounds reasonable.

Henrietta another Amazonian Librarian: Can we trust him?

The Chanterator: Cross my fingers and hope you die.

Colon-El: What!?!

The Chanterator: Cross my heart... yes my heart... and hope to die.

Private Screening: One second please...

The Chanterator: Be my guest. The three Privates, 500 Amazonian Librarians and 10,000 Chantanian soldiers form a huddle...

Private Property: OK. You've got a deal.

The Chanterator: Excellent.

Private Parts: But no sneakily banishing us to other websites during the battle, OK?

The Chanterator: The merest possibility of the slightest thought had not even contemplated crossing my mind... much.

Brit: Obviously Narrators can't internally monologue.

The Chanterator: Did I say that out loud?

RM552: Excuse me everyone. We've got a War to finish here.

The Chanterator: 10,503 robotic mail minions charge at the 10,000 Chantanian Soldiers, 500 Amazonian Librarians and three Privates.

Colon-El: That's better.

Private Property: Hmm, I think we may have miscalculated somewhere in our negotiations.

The Chanterator: Charge, my robotic mail minions!

RM552: Attack!!!