Dear Chant.

Yes we have established that you have been around since the DCMB days.

However this does not make Chant (the character) an automatic member of the JLR.

As was the case in the DCMB days, prior to becoming a member, posters were required to undertake a rigorous membership application process. Prior to your arrival on the scene two applicants had been rejected.

One, a certain Any Given Wednesday, who was more successful on his second attempt, and of course Space Tart, who applied for membership twice and was rejected both times (please note that Space Tart did not have an entry on the membership roster).

Shall we see how your good self approached the JLR…

Quote:

Chant
New Member posted December 05, 2002 07:10 AM

I WANNA BE THE VILLAIN!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHA
THE WORLD IS MINE
I AM INVINCIBLE, INVINCIBLE I SAY!!!
"said the mouze to the elephant"
Seriously, all superteams needs a villain, I´m perfect, I have military
training, quite good at tactics and I never agree with anyone but myself.
Chant



Not, I would like to join the JLR. But “I WANNA BE THE VILLAIN!!!”

Now I am prepared to give you the benefit of the doubt, that there may have been the possibility that you were a little confused. You have certainly demonstrated that over the years. However, you quickly followed up your first post with the following:

Quote:

Chant
New Member posted December 05, 2002 07:15 AM

I should be the villain, I am perfect for the job



DJ Miker Dee asked, “Are you my ex-wife?”

midnightspectre ignored you.

nets4life (aka La Machine), suggested, “In the meantime, DAMN YOU CHAAAANT!!!
How's that for my catchphrase against the villain?”

Now here was your opportunity to clear the decks, say “Hey guys, it’s the stock-standard superhero mistaken identity thing, I’m actually a hero and want to join the JLR”. But you did not. Instead you replied with:

Quote:

Chant
New Member posted December 06, 2002 02:53 AM


You will never defeat me!!!
I am invincible!!
Even now in my secret lair at the postoffice I am planning my revenge on
the world....
Crap!!!
I accidently unintentionally completely subconciously gave you the
location of my secret lair....I am Thwarted
"smelling a trap here?"
Chant
I am clumsine....ehhh evil incarnate!!
Chant the bad guy



Well we have to acknowledge your honesty in the last post.

Anyhoo…

super chief expressed his concern with “well if any evildoer try to atack us i hope somebody have the prep time to defeat him”.

This was followed up, by a certain Britannica, a recently appointed member of the JLR. Who said:

Quote:

Britannica
New Member posted December 06, 2002 06:39 AM

Hope you have found your friend, midnight! As nets4life said, I'm sure she
will be OK.
While you take care of the important things, the rest of us, will take
care of the Chant!
Though Chant tried to STAMP his villanous authority upon the world, we
have him LICKED!
We shall DELIVER righteous justice, to the would-be (POST)MASTER of the
Free World.
Though I am a bit confussed as to what Chant's actual plan is?
And why revenge? What deed could have caused such hatred of humanity?
Could it have been due to little Chant not getting that cute puppy he
asked for one Christmas?
I think this requires further investigation. . .
Britannica



And how did you respond to this gesture of friendship, this chance at redemption?

Quote:

Chant
New Member posted December 06, 2002 07:07 AM

HAH!!!
Britannica, You could´nt punch a Mosqitou offcourse....
hahahahahaha
I shall defeat you all with my "SUPER DUPER ULTRA TECHNO BOMB" with no
reset button....
Crap, no I die too.....AARRGGHHHH
"hides behind the sofa hands covering ears"
Next I shall destroy you googytushu band of would-be second hand heroes

"No offense, in case some of you are very easy to offend"
I shall be back....Once I get away from the Psychiatric (is that spelled
correctly?" Ward



That’s right. You tried to blow us up. (and for the record, no offence was taken).

And so forth and so on.

You attacked our Bachelor Pad of Justice on numerous occasions, you kidnapped our only female member, JMAngelo, riffled through her underwear draw and shot her into space, you made midnightspectre grow into a giant, you turned your’s truly temporarily evil and you tied Any Given Wednesday’s shoes together, amoungst other things. And ultimately you were responsible for our first HQ to be destroyed by your Giant Paper Golem.

These are not the actions of a member of the JLR, but those of an arch enemy.

And once more, in our time of crisis, the hand of friendship was offered to you:

Quote:

Batman117 posted December 19, 2002 08:34 PM


Everyone get on as soon as you can.

That includes you Chant!!!



And how did you respond when you got to the new board?

Quote:

Fri Dec 20 2002 05:25AM

It is I, Chant, the Madmailer who has come back to harass your lives you pitiful wouldbe heroes of the JLR-MB..

Ahh, another board another plan.......



Not even a thank you….

And so it went, until the next adventure, JLR: The Convention Adventure, when…

Quote:

Tue Mar 25 2003 02:50 PM

Meanwhile at Chant´s secret lair where the mailmaster of mayhem is working on the Chantmobile!! (a yellow postman bicycle actually)

Chant: I have grown tired of this behind the scene manipulation, I must have action, I must reinvent the papergolem, or perhaps rebuild my army of evil postal worker minions!!!

Narrator: Just then a couple of wires touch eachother and erupts into a huge explosion causing a rent in the time/space Continuum!!
Out of this comes two lightning bolts, one black and one white, the black on strikes the floor turning into an as yet undisclosed form, and the white one strikes Chant in the head......

A couple of seconds later!!

Chant: what was that? I feel like 10 blacksmiths are using my head as an anvil! who am I, what am I, am I a Postman??
No, all this equipment, all these weapons, I must, I must be a SUPERHERO, placed on this world to battle against the evil and wicked and the stupendously stupid people!!

Narrator: The black bolt has turned into an incredible beautiful lady with a wicked look in her eyes

EvilGoddess: I am, in the real world, or as real as it gets!! A new world to wreack havoc upon, I´m free to kill all the little puny humans to do a......

Narrator: At that moment the EvilGoddess is struck behind the head and knocked to the ground by Chant, the Superhero whilst he strikes an impressive (or something akin to it) pose

Chant: Nay I say woman, hey, that rhymes! I Chant fighter for freedom and defender of the righteous shall defe.......

Narrator: Just then the EvilGoddess kicks Chant in the groin who buckles over in pain undescripable!!

EvilGoddess: goodbye little man, we shall not meet again, I shall find enemies of real mettle to test my powers against!!!

Narrator: She leaves, leaving Chant lying on the floor writhing in pain!!

Will Chant ever regain his memory?
Is the EvilGoddess really a goddess?
and why does a realistic way of avoiding taxes not exist?
read more some other time!



And then you didn’t have the decency to join yourself, but through the JLR member AGW (formerly Any Given Wednesday):

Quote:

Thu May 15 2003 10:34 AM

The JLR arm themselves and strike their fighting poses.

Dun-Like-Dinner: Chant, what're you doing here?

Chant: I've come to join the JLR in their never-ending battle against evil and tyranny, of course!

The JLR relax their poses.

Ace: But you're evil and tyranny.

The JLR re-strike their poses.

Chant: What're you talking about? I'm Chant, the Sworn Savior of...

JLR: .

Chant: Stamps.

JLR:

(young) Nightwing [whispering into LM's ear]: J'onn detects no malice or trickery from Chant. The postmaster's intentions seem noble.

LM: J'onn told you?

(young): He's invisible.

LM: Ohhhhh...

Reggie: Umm... is Mr. Chant a member of your team.

LM: Yes, he is.

JLR:

LM: He's a member of the team... for now. Chant's skills may actually prove useful, and besides, I'm still the leader so what I say goes .

Reggie: Well this is all very unorthodox, but I suppose we can allow it since it won't change your roster for the first fight.

JLR: still.

Reggie: You see, the maximum number of participants allowed in any battle is five. Since both teams possess more than five members, the fight rosters have been chosen at random.

Dun-Like-Dinner: Well, who's fighting?

Reggie: Robin, Impulse, Superboy, Empress, and Wondergirl versus Britannica, Harpy, Ace, Any Given Wednesday, and (young) Nightwing.

Dun-Like-Dinner: Well, that not--

Reggie: Oh, and your fight starts in 45 seconds.

JLR: Crap!

DLD: Well, good luck guys. By the way, why ARE you still wearing that tux, AGW?

AGW [shrugs]: Ummmmm, well you see it's very simple--

Somewhere else, both staring through THEIR OWN pairs of binoculars.

Alice: This is not good.

Beatrix: Not good at all.

Narrator:
Even with their newest member, the JLR find their numbers suddenly cut in half. Can these five heroes of the JLR defeat some of Young Justice's most powerful members?
Find out next post!



But none-the-less, you finally became a member of the JLR!

But alas, after a distinguished service of 4 pages, a convention and some training in the Room of Spirit and Time, your time with the JLR was up.

Quote:

Mon Oct 27 2003 04:27 PM
JLR: The Convention Adventure

The Ending

Narrator: The JLR stands victorious, they have won their most difficult battle yet. It was won using subterfuge, cunning and sheer violence.

Wednesday: Well, that was slightly different than usual.

LA Machine: Whatever do you mean?

Wednesday: Well, fighting Thor has really given me a perspective on life that I have not previously thought about.

Britannica: What is that?

Wednesday: No matter how big and strong you are, a good BFAAMS will always get the better of you!

Britannica: Word!

LA Machine: So, we all fought real heroes this time, and we all won, it seems….

Cowgirl Jack: ARGGHH, MY BOOTS, THEY ARE RUNIED!!!

Ace: well, geez, I’m sorry to hear that CJ, ummm, maybe you can get the fixed…or somethin´

Cowgirl Jack: Yes, fixes, yes. RM #552! Can you fix my boots? Oh pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease???

RM #552: I’m sorry CJ, but those boots are just ripped beyond repair, but don’t worry, they come with a warranty!

JLR:

RM #552: Yes, a warranty, what’s so weird about that?

Cowgirl Jack: YES, YES, WHAT`S SO WEIRD ABOUT THAT????

JLR: Ummm….nothin´

Britannica: While we’re at it. LA Machine, you looked a little confused after you fight with Giantman

LA Machine: I was just a little confused because last I notice we were still inside the room, and now we’re here.

Narrator: The rest of the JLR looked at each other, and then shrugged.

Ace: It happens man, don’t worry about it.

Cowgirl Jack: Uh, uh uh uh uh, how about you Chant, how did you defeat all those soldiers, I man, I don’t see any clones around here?

Chant: What makes you think that I’m not a clone?

Cowgirl Jack: well ummm….

Chant: don’t worry, I didn’t clone myself, I used a different method than the cloning thing.

Wednesday: Why?

Chant: I forgot how to clone myself!

LA Machine: That explains everything

Cowgirl Jack: Psst, hey Ace, let’s hope he never remembers

Ace:

Chant:

Britannica: Then how did you do it?

Chant: It’s a simple thing, I stood before all the soldiers, and it was getting rather embarrassing since I told them that they should wait until I had cloned myself.

JLR: yes, yes, go on!

Chant: Anyhoo, it didn’t work, I couldn’t clo….

Narrator: With a loud BANG, Mjolnir, the enchanted hammer of the Thunder God Thor hits Chant in the back of his head. Chant immediately gets up and picks up the hammer and turns around with a:

Chant: WHO DID THAT???

Narrator: Suddenly Chant straightens and gets a confused look in his eyes and smiles

Chant: Look, birdies…..and bells, they go ding dong all day long

Wednesday: ummm, are you alright mon?

Narrator: Suddenly Chant turns around and drops the hammer, he looks at the JLR with surprise.

Chant: THE JLR, Stand back you bloody do-gooders, or I shall have to destroy you!

Ace: Oh boy, here we go again!

Britannica: It seems like he is back to evil again

Cowgirl Jack: Well, it was bound to happen sometime

LA Machine: Ohh well, we better get ready to fight him

Midnight Spectre: He did lift the hammer of Thor, he must be very powerful now!

Narrator: Wednesday used his TK to pull a closet near Chant, Britannica pointed his toe at him, Cowgirl Jack made herself ready to charge, Ace pulled an ace, Midnight Spectre charged up his Golden Fist attack, RM #552 pointed a thingie at him and LA Machine created a vegi bomb to throw at him.

Chant: Hmmm, hey, ain´t that Charlton Heston?

Narrator: All as one the JLR turn their heads in the direction Chant pointed, and the Mailmaster of Mayhem makes his daring escape.

Wednesday: Bloody hell, he escaped, again.

Midnight Spectre: He always do, well, let us collect the prize money

JLR: UH, MONEY!!!



So once more you became our arch-nemesis and gained the power of The Narrator and became The Chanterator.

But that’s a story for another day.

So. There you go Chant. The evidence speaks for itself.

You have certainly been hanging around the JLR since the DCMB days, but you were only a member for four pages in JLR: The Convention Adventure.

I rest my case.

Member of the Justice League Reality