The Ambassador's Private Chambers: The JLR sit on one side of a long table, facing the rest of the room. They're all anxious to see what Big City's heroes have to offer.
Ace sharpens his pencil and looks down at his clipboard, ready to make every note necessary to put together the best anti-Vegi-La team ever assembled.
Ambassador: Are you sure this is safe?
Wednesday: Safe as a rabid koala bear in the vegitable aisle.
Ambassador: What?
Registered Member 552: Bring in the first candidate!
The doors open and a man dressed in a red and yellow foam suit walks in, his cape flapping behind.
Ace: State your name and power.
Candidate 1: My name is The Tube. I can fly and have enough strength in my left arm to punch a hole clear through any wall.
Registered Member 552: That's great! How far can you fly?
The Tube: About five feet!
Registered Member 552: Five feet?
The Tube: Seven on a downhill.
Wednesday: ...Alrighty then. Let's see you punch a hole in that wall.
The Tube: Is it paper?
Cowgirl Jack: No.
The Tube: Thin cardboard?
Cowgirl Jack: No.
The Tube: If it's glass it might cut--
Ace: Next!
A strange looking man in a black trenchcoat with thick glasses walks in. He's kinda sweaty.
Ace: Your name and power, please.
Candidate 2: My name is Virgil, I can turn myself invisible...
Cowgirl Jack: That's interesting.
Virgil: I use it to go into women's locker rooms and take pictures for my private collection. Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhheeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Wednesday: I like him!
Cowgirl Jack: Next!
After several hours of not much better a giant red and blue robot walks in.
Ace: Name and power, please.
Candidate 43: Prime. Optimus Prime. I transform.
Registered Member 552: Sounds interesting. Could you show--
Suddenly, the robot shifts and moves body parts, wheels pop out from nowhere, and he turns into a semi truck. Then, a trailer busts through the wall of the room and connects to the back.
Ambassador: Ah!
Midnight Spectre: Coolest. Hero. Ever!
Ace: Let me be the first to shake your hand and welcome you to the Justice League--
Man: Wait!
A man in a business suit walks in through the hole in the wall carrying a briefcase. He slams the case on the table in front of Ace and opens it. It's filled with papers which the man scurries through.
Man: My name is Mr. Walken and I'm the Chief Attorney for Hasbro Entertainment.
Ace: I'm sorry, Chief Attorney for Hasbro Entertainment, but we were just about to welcome our first new member and you'll have to wait your turn.
Mr. Walken: No, you don't understand. As you can see on his contract right here, it states that Mr. Prime is owned by Hasbro.
Ace: What?!
Mr. Walken: Oh, and you owe us money for this cameo. Sorry.
Ace: But we finally...
Mr. Walken: Come on, Prime. Roll out.
Optimus Prime:
Ace: Name. Power.
Candidate 63 [striking a triumphant pose]: My name is Water Dude.
Cowgirl Jack: Dumb name, but cool pose. And he's all muscley.
Registered Member 552: What do you do, Water Dude?
Water Dude: I can talk to fish.
JLR:
Water Dude: What?
Registered Member 552: That's a stupid super power.
Wednesday: The dumbest.
Cowgirl Jack: I can talk to my rabbit, but you don't see me dressing up in tacky orange and green.
Water Dude: Don't laugh at me! I've got a can of tuna!
JLR:
X 5.
Wednesday: NEXT!
