seriously. I've been taking a shit every hour. You can set your watch by it. The worst part is that its mostly wet, so there's not much to wipe. But all the wiping is chaffing my butt crack. It's red and sore, and I think I saw a little bit of blood on the tissue earlier. I hope my asshole doesn't end up looking like Burt Wards because of it.


Internet Friends:
Nowhereman: Says "cunt" a lot. Is also welsh or something.
Brian Jonopoulos: Greek. Fucks socks. Also jobless and lives at home.
Joe Mamma: Fat
Captain Sammitch: Fucks fat chicks
Stupid Doog: Married to a fat chick