RKMBs Forums .::Important::. RDCW Havoc 11/4/04

Captain Sammitch pulled himself back up the Lightweight ranks with his win over former champ PJP.

Anathema Wednesday saw the crowning of a new princess in the RDCW Women's division when Meeko got herself all dirty with the rest of the Hotties and seductively wrestled her way into champion status as the new Women's Boobie Belt champ.

The Legbreakers for Hire proved once again their competitve desire for the Tag belts as they squashed old rivals The Liberal Conspiracy.

History was made as Joe Mama faced off against Nowhereman. Both competitors' belts on the line. In a bloody and gruesome battle, Joe Mama eeked out a win against first and only holder of the Intercuntinetal title by applying his world famous Joe Mama Lock.

TK defended his Heavyweight Cheese Title against not one but two fierce challengers IN A STEEL CAGE! URG and Drzsmith tried their best to grab the gold, but in the end, it was TK's stamina and quick moves that allowed him to pin both of his opponents and regain his title.

Now, the Doctor has announced that he'll start off the show in a few minutes with a very important announcement.

Lightweight Match single choice

Dave The Wonder Boy (86%, 12 Votes)

MOTA (14%, 2 Votes)

Total Votes: 14 Voting on this poll ends: 2026-05-04 10:31 PM

Eurotrash Division single choice

Zod (14%, 2 Votes)

King Snarf (86%, 12 Votes)

Total Votes: 14 Voting on this poll ends: 2026-05-04 10:31 PM

Intergender Tag Match single choice

Captain of Outer Space/Butterican (36%, 5 Votes)

JQ/Kimi (0%, 0 Votes)

Sammtich/Meeko (64%, 9 Votes)

Total Votes: 14 Voting on this poll ends: 2026-05-04 10:31 PM

Hardcore Porn single choice

Velo (43%, 6 Votes)

Bibbo (57%, 8 Votes)

Total Votes: 14 Voting on this poll ends: 2026-05-04 10:31 PM

Grudge Match: Handicap/Tag Elimination Match single choice

Joe Mama/Son of Mxy (43%, 6 Votes)

Chris Oakley (57%, 8 Votes)

Total Votes: 14 Voting on this poll ends: 2026-05-04 10:31 PM

*The Doctor walks down to the ring. Instead of his usual entrance music of War Pigs playing, it's the Irish durge Oh, Danny Boy. He climbs into the ring and is handed the mic. He stands and waits with his head bowed for the music to stop.*

Ladies and gentlemen, I come out here tonight with sad, sad news. This is a hard business. You get to see wrestlers come and go all the time; but you can never get used to losing them. A hard life makes for a short life; and it seems that another life has been claimed in the name of wrestling. I regret to inform you all of the passing of.... the rWo.

*He walks over and stands in a spot in just out of reach of the ropes.*

In this very spot, you saw the death throws of the rWo as Nowhereman fought to break free of the Joe Mama Lock. Here it was gasping for air and clawing. Then, with the final tap of Nowhereman's hand *Taps the mat three times.* came the final beat of it's black heart.

It took time, but we finally managed to systematically eliminate the rWo from each and every division in the RDCW. They're tricks and underhandedness stole the gold away from the men and women who worked their asses off for a shot at recognition. One by one, that gold was stripped away not by underhanded ploys. Not by cheap tricks. Not by manufactured means. But by hard work and talent. The Tag belts came home. The Women's belt came home. The Eurotrash belt came home, and Grimm was sent into obscurity. The Heavyweight Cheese belt came home. And last week at Anathema Wednesday, Joe Mama pulled Nowhereman out of his gilded palace and snatched away his private little trophy.

I ask you, the remenants of the rWo, where is your leader now? Where is Nowhereman? Well, I think his name answers that question. Nowhere to be found. He's tucked his tail between his legs and fled the Cheesedome. He's headed to HOLLYWOOD! for his big break. And where are you left? Up shit creek without a paddle. You've been broken and abandoned. You don't have anyone to protect you anymore. What do you do now?

I'll tell you what you'll do. You'll find the nicest suit of clothes you can afford, shine up those Sunday church shoes untill your ugly faces are staring back with those blank looks of yours, run a fine comb through your hair, and then come down to my office. With the biggest, friendliest, and kindliest smile on your face...... you'll give me a damned good reason not to fire your ass!

The rWo is nothing but fading memory! Zipped up in a body bag and laying in a shallow grave! The RDCW lives on!

*War Pigs blares through the speakers as pyro explodes.*

As The Doctor makes his way to the back, where he will wait for the former RwO member to come to his office, Joe Mama steps out from the back and starts making his way to the ring. He's wearing the Tag Team belt around his waist, with the Eurotrash belt on his right shoulder and the Inter-Cunt-Inental belt on his left. He stops in from of The Doctor and the two have an exchange. Then they head to the ring. Joe Mama hops up and spreads the ring-ropes to allow The Doctor entrance, then enters the ring himself. The Doctor then hands Joe Mama a mic...

JM: I have an announcement to make, one that I promised to deliver here tonight, and I wanted The Doctor here with me so that you (the fans) and you (the wrestlers in the back) knew that I was dead-serious. Y'see, after I made Nowhereman tap out, thus ending the RwO's reign here in the RDCW, I went to this man's office and we had a long chat about the state of the RDCW now that the RwO is no longer around. We agreed that the destruction of the RwO meant more chances for some guys who deserved chances. We agreed that some veterans, who haven't been seen around since the RwO invaded, would return to active competition. And we agreed on one more thing...

The crowd murmurs in anticipation...

JM: We agreed that my holding the Eurotrash title AND the Inter-Cunt-Inental title is not good for the RDCW.

The crowd is shocked!

JM: Months ago, I said that the RwO's title monopoly was not good for the RDCW. I made it my goal to destroy the RwO and, dammit, I did just that. I delivered the killing blows when I defeated Grimm for this Eurotrash belt...TWICE! And I finished the job by breaking Nowhereman's body and spirit, and I won the Inter-Cunt-Inental belt in the process. But I'll be the last person to say that I did it alone. My match with my friend TK-069, which led to my Eurotrash title match, was a factor. My friendship with Son Of Mxy - a Legend like his parents bfore him - and our Tag Team title victory was a factor. My matches with King Snarf and Rex were factors. The RDCW made me what I am today, and I aim to give back to its wrestlers and fans what they gave me.

Next week, the Doctor has booked some of the RDCW's best wrestlers in a tournament to become the NEW Inter-Cunt-Inental Champion. At the end of that tournament, I will end my IC title reign and hand over the belt to the winner. I'm doing this because no single wrestler should hold this many titles, and I firmly believe that there are more than a few wrestlers in the back who have waited too long for their shot at gold. We all suffered at the hands of the RwO. We all fought to destroy the RwO. And now, we will reap the benefits for our success against the RwO.

The crowd is cheering!

JM: But that's next week. This week, Son Of Mxy and I have some business to finish. Because Chris Oakley - who is a coward; who is a cheap rip-off of your's truly; who decided to blindside us even though we made no attempt to attack him - has decided that he wants to shorten his career. So, tonight, he will face the Tag Team Champions in a handicap match. Chris, if you honestly think you're gonna win, I got one question for ya: "YOU AND HOW MANY FAMILY MEMBERS?!?" Son Of Mxy is the Lightweight Champion! I hold the Eurotrash and (for this week) the Inter-Cunt-Inental titles! WE are the Tag Team Champions! You think YOU can beat us?!? We WILL put a hurt on you! You WILL lose tonight! You should only hope that we don't beat you so bad taht you can't compete for the IC belt, because that'll be the closest you come to taking ANYTHING from me!!!

You're a pale imitation, Chris. Tonight, you get your first lesson in what GREATNESS truly is!!!

No music plays. Joe Mama stares out towards the back for a few moments, then he opens the ring-ropes and he and The Doctor make their way to the back, Doc to his office, and Joe Mama to prepare for his match.

Backstage,Chris watches a replay of JM's speech and silently fumes.By the look on his face,it's obvious he's not happy with JM's comments.

Somebody's going to have set that asshole straight on a few things.

He grabs a wireless mic and bolts out to the ring.

In place of his usual entrance music,"Jump Around",Chris makes his appearance to the ominous strains of the theme from Jaws.He glares at the crowd as they start to boo.

Shut the fuck up!

Dead silence.

I just heard Joe Mama running his mouth off a few minutes ago,and he was right about one thing.We are going to see somebody's career tonight end...HIS!

Crowd boos even louder.

Last week I found somebody who's going to help climb to the top of the RDCW ladder,where I belong.I won't say who he is yet,but trust me you'll all get to see him before the night's over.Oh,and one more thing--I'm going to give Joe Mama and Son of Mxy an ass-kicking that will bring a whole new meaning to the words "handicap match".
The soon-to-be new IC champion has spoken!

Throws the mic down and storms back to the locker room.

*Louie Bastardo stands in the ring, looking very pleased with himself. He holds up a mic and begins to speak.*

"Tonight, begins a new era, in the RDCW, and all of you people. . ."

*points at crowd. crowd booes.

"Will be the first to witness it! The dawning of the Bastardo Family! You see, at Anathema Wednesday, I promised the world that I introduce the first member of the Bastardo Family tonight, and I am! But, in true Bastardo fashion, I have procured the services of not one, but TWO RDCW competitors! These two men will be the foundation, the backbone, of the Bastardo Family as we rise to prominence within the RDCW, and capture the gold that rightfully belongs to us!"


*crowd booes even louder.

"At this moment. . ."

*crowd starts chanting "ASSHOLE! ASSHOLE!"

"You morons shut up!"

*crowd is really starting to get on Bastardo now.

"What you're doing right now, you're sealing some poor schmuck's fate tonight, you know that? You will be the cause of someone in the RDCW getting taken out, Bastardo style!"

"At this moment, I will introduce the first signee to the Bastardo Family, and later tonight, you will witness my second signee, one of the toughest competitors in RDCW, and the Bastardo Family enforcer!"

"Now, I want to introduce the man who will be the crown jewel, the centerpiece of the all new Bastardo Family! A man underlooked and underutilized by the RDCW, a competitor of amazing talents! A truly royal class of athlete, the one, the only. . . KING SNARF!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*Snarf's music hits as the crowd goes silent in awe. However, instead of walking to the ring, he is carried out on a throne by six jobbers.

The RDCW locker room. Sammitch is taping up his wrists and forearms as Penwing talks to him.

PenWing: Here's what I don't get. Why an intergender tag match? And why would they put you and Meeko out there? You both just had matches at Anathema Wednesday! I haven't been in the ring there the last two events!

Sammitch: I don't write the card for every show, PenWing. They schedule matches, I wrestle in said matches, and if I'm lucky, I'm winning when the bell rings. Look at it this way - you get a break for the night, and you just might be thankful for it next event if they give you some kind of nasty handicap match or something.

PW: That's just it. I don't want to rest, man! I want to wrestle! I want to get out there and win matches - and win more belts!

CS: I told you - we're not about belts. At least Meeko and I aren't. There's more to this than that.

PW: <holding up a hand> I know, I know, I know. We have plans and all that good stuff. Well so far, those plans aren't landing me the matches I want. I'm getting tired of this, Sammitch.

CS: Not my call, 'Wing. You don't like it, take it up with Meeko. She's the one that's got your contract. <Puts a hand on PenWing's shoulder.> Me, I'd just tell you to take it easy, man. You'll get your chance. Just keep being a good team player, wrestle the matches that come to you, and sooner or later, things'll work out. Trust me.

<The door opens and Meeko enters.>

CS: Hey! You feelin' okay? <Meeko nods> Awesome. <Turning to PenWing> Tonight, Pennie, is just another match. Don't you worry about us. Meeko here even cleans house in the mud! And I did a decent job of handling PJP. So relax. Next time, you'll get your shot.

PW: I just don't understand how you two can get away with playing fair when everyone else out there is throwing cheap shots and low blows. I know they'll be doing more of the same tonight. Just watch your backs, and if they pull any crazy shit, I'll be right out there.

CS: Appreciated, as always. <Turning to Meeko> Let's get ready to kick some ass out there.

<Sammitch and Meeko walk out of the locker room, leaving a rather frustrated PenWing behind.>

That's right! The era of the Bastardo Family has begun! Not only did his royalness, King Snarf, humiliate and wipe the floor with Zod, but the toughest man in RDCW, the Bastardo Family Enforcer, Chris Oakley destroyed not one, but two men! Your heroes, holding five belts between them, I might add, Joe Mama and Son of Mxy fell before the merciless onslaught of the one, true Oakley!

Thus do we begin the Bastardo dynasty! A new era of greatness for the RDCW!

Lightweight Match
DaveTWB over MOTA. SilverSault (toprope corkscrew moonsault).

EuroTrash Division
King Snarf over Zod. Multiple Bastard Bombs.

Intergender Triple Threat Tag Elimination
Captain Sammitch/Meeko over JQ/Kimi and Captain of Outer Space/Buterrican. Meekolock (Boston Crab) and Sammitch Slam.

Hardcore Porn
Bibbo over Velo. Ace O' Clubs (top rope suplex) to the ringside floor.


Grudge Handicap Match
Chris Oakley over Joe Mama/Son of Mxy. Bastardoference.

After the bout, Louie Bastardo and King Snarf stormed the ring, laying down a savage three on two beatdown. Leaving the fan favorite champions senseless, the Bastardo Family celebrated in the ring!