DAVE
Who he claims to be: Australian Lawyer. Comic book fan
Who he is in real life: German Billionaire - Albrecht Fassbinder. Founder of the Tell me about Comics company. Enjoys dressing up in a tight leather costume, with the intention of battling the forces of crime on the tough, seedy streets of Hamburg. Somehow these vigilante escapades always end up with Albrecht stretched across the knees of some rough sailor type, on the receiving end of a hard spanking for being a bad boy.
JOEY FROM FRIENDS
Who he claims to be: Periodic contributor to the off-topic forum. Man of mystery. Probably not really Joey from Friends.
Who he is in real life: Internet anomaly known as ‘the Joey effect’, common to most well-populated message boards. Phantom poster - a mirage brought into being by high frequency, low content posts by other users.
USCHI
Who she claims to be: Student. Manufacturer of pharmaceutical compounds.
Who she is in real life: Intelligent dolphin trained to communicate via a specially developed keyboard, built into the side of her tank. Long absence from the boards can be explained by the death of Uschi 1 and the training of her successor, also named Uschi.
Thanks to the Florida Institute of Dolphin Cognitive Studies for the info. I owe you a beer Jeff!
