THE TIME TRUST
Who he claims to be: Canadian. Spammer. Sworn guardian of Time.
Who he is in real life: Derrick Scotch. Runs an animal bank in Mexico City.
In 2001, I opened an account at The Scotch Animal Bank, using a handful of ants. My intial investment has since matured into a pair of gold-backed otters and magic fish that can grant simple wishes.
Derrick Scotch AKA The Time Trust has asked me to point that your investment may fall as well as rise in value, depending on market forces. The Scotch Animal Bank regrets that it cannot accept devalued animal currencies such as Mosquitos
