"Heaven is where the innkeepers are Swiss, the cooks are French, the policemen are English, the lovers are Italian, and the mechanics are German. Hell is where the lovers are Swiss, the innkeepers are French, the cooks are English, the mechanics are Italian, and policemen are German."
- Joke told by a Dutch Professor
"You know the world is off tilt when the best rapper is a white guy [Eminem], the best golfer is a black guy [Tiger Woods], the tallest basketball player is Chinese [Yao Ming, 7'6"], and Germany doesn't want to go to war [in Iraq]."
- Charles Barkley, 2003
"I myself drive a Yom Kippur Clipper. That's a Jewish Cadillac -- stops on a dime and picks it up."
- Kinky Friedman, The Great Psychadelic Armadillo Picnic, A "Walk" in Austin, Crown Journeys, 2004, p.27
"The Haoles [1] run the plantations; the Chinese run the businesses; the Japanese run the government; and the Hawaiians run for the hills."
- Hawaiian joke
"Lebanese are the ones who can buy from Greeks and sell to Jews and still make a profit."
- Lebanese saying
"Why do you rarely see a Navajo trading post? Because if their kin are hungry, they'd give the stuff to their kinfolks. I admire that."
- Tony Hillerman, mystery writer & University of New Mexico journalism professor, quoted in the Spring 1996 Mirage, the University of New Mexico Alumni magazine
"They [the Chinese] are quiet, peaceable, tractable, free from drunkenness, and they are as industrious as the day is long. A disorderly Chinaman is rare, and a lazy one does not exist."
- Mark Twain, in Roughing It
"Why do you want to go picketing and boycotting some cracker, begging him for a job?"
- Malcolm X
"All stereotypes are true."
- Bill Maher, "Politically Incorrect"
