"When It All Goes Wrong Again" hits the speakers as King Snarf makes his way to the ring!
KS: Ladies and gentlemen, Robblemania is one week away! Are you all excited? *crowd cheers* Are you ready for Robblemania? *crowd cheers louder* Do you think that Son of Mxy and PenWing fighting me for the World title will be a helluva main event? *crowd cheers really loud* Well, too bad! 'Cause nothing is going to make me happier than retaining my World Title on the grandest stage of them all when I win with a headlock! *Crowd boos*
Now, clearly, PenWing and SoM aren't quite aware of what they're getting themselves into. So I've invited an old acquaintance here to set them straight. Ladies and gentlemen, you know him, you love him, here he is- TK-069!
"Wanksta" by 50 Cent hits the speaker as the crowd goes wild. There cheers quickly turn to boos as it is not TK but an old man dressed in TK's Hammer get-up who makes his way to the ring.
Marcum: Look, TK's back! Man he's let himself go!
Monroe: Oh for the love of... That's not TK-069!
Marcum: King Snarf said it was! The champ wouldn't lie, would he?
The old TK slowly gets in the ring and is handed a microphone by one of the ring crew. Old TK looks befuddled.
KS: TK? It's me, King Snarf!
Old TK: Aaah! Don't retire me again!
KS: No, no, no! I just invited you here because I beat you for the title and you haven't showed up in the Cheesedome since. Now, you used to be quite the regular here. What happened?
Old TK: I stopped taking my Metamucil.
Marcum: Ah-ha-haa! He's not regular!
Monroe: I'm less than amused, and so are these fans.
KS: TK, I gotta say, you've seemed to age a bit. What's the deal?
Old TK: Well, when you beat the holy hell out of me, it took a few years off my life. I had no choice but to retire.
KS: How's that been?
Old TK: Not so good. Stareena left me, and even Llance has stopped making obscene phone calls!
KS: Oh, that's TOO bad... So any plans for Robblemania weekend?
Old TK: Well, I'm gonna wake up a 6 a.m., go to the local mall and walk around for a couple hours, go home and watch Matlock, then some warm broth for dinner before turning down for bed at 6:30 p.m.
KS: WOW. That's the highlife right there. Any words for PenWing or SoM before you go?
Old TK: For Gob's sake, don't show up unless you want to be retired like me! Treasure your youth and don't face King Snarf!
KS: Well, there you have it boys! You've heard what happens to folks who face me in the ring, straight from the horse's mouth! And if that didn't convince you squaring of with me is a bad idea...
King Snarf drops the mic and boots the old man in the stomach, setting him up for a vicious Bastard Bomb! King Snarf raises his arms triumphantly as he leaves the ring, crowd booing fiercely the whole time.
Marcum: Look at that! King Snarf took out the ex-champ in no time! He's gonna make short work of the challengers at Robblemania!
Monroe: That was, without a doubt, one of the most appalling things I have seen in all my years here! I hope that King Snarf gets whats coming to him this Sunday!
Last edited by King Snarf; 2005-03-25 5:32 AM.
