Cut to backstage. King Snarf Rules is in the Bastardo Family locker room, mic in hand. Joe Mama is standing with him.

KSR: Champ, coming into Robblemania XXI, it seems like the Bastardo Family has a ton of enemies looking to destroy everything the Family has built. Your comments?

JM: Who are we talking about? Chris Oakley, with his vague empty threats and consistent failure? The Family has dispatched him enough times that no one fears him. He's a pathetic example of someone who realizes that their glory is gone, even as he desperately tries to cling to it.

SPAMM and the rest of his "Rapidly Deteriorating Jobber League"? He wants a ten-man tag match against the Family for what Johnny Evil did to them? Fine. We have no problem delivering yet ANOTHER beatdown! Of course, I've gotta wonder about that match...isn't it interesting how quickly SPAMM deserted Tommy, even though he was in the most immediate danger? Did the wrong League-member save the lady fair? Following that theme, does King Arthur know what's been going on between his Guenivere and Lancelot? It's like I've said about watching your own back and keeping the personal away from the business...

Nowhereman? Ah, how the mighty have fallen! It must kill him to see his former protegees, me and Sneaky Bunny, surpass him! And knowing that the Legbreakers are no longer available for him to have fight his battles must eat at him as well! Now it seems like he has some sort of deathwish - otherwise, why is he running off at the mouth about the Family? Y'know, I thought I'd seen the last of him when I finished him and the rest of the RwO off months ago. And I thought that we were even when he cost me the Eurotrash Title against Sammitch! Buddy, you want me to send you packing again? Name the time and the place...I'll end your career whenever you want!

KSR: Speaking of Captain Sammitch, you're facing him tonight for the Inter-Cunt-Inental Title. He's made references to a big surprise he has in store for you. Are you worried?

JM: Worried? About Captain Sammitch? Let me tell you something: If Nowhereman hadn't appeared and driven a bat into my skull, there'd be no "former Eurotrash Champion" next to either Sammitch's or my name. Captain Sammitch didn't win that match, Nowhereman did. And Sammitch knows it! So what's his surprise? Lemme guess - either before my match or after I retain my title, he and the man-servant PenWing are gonna jump me, maybe with some other losers they conned into joining their faction. Gee...whatta surprise!!! All that proves is that Sammitch knows he can't beat me one-on-one. I'm amazed he even signed the contract after he heard the stipulations! But the fact remains: Captain Sammitch is a two-faced, lying litle coward and, tonight, I'm going to hurt him in ways he has never imagined! Tonight, Sammitch, look forward to losing a lot of blood! Because I'm not just looking to retain MY Inter-Cunt-Inental Titles! I'm looking to destroy everything that you love, and everything you are!!!

Uschi said:
I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry.

MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost!

"I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock

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