Lightweight Faggot Title: Johnny Evil vs Spandex Monkey Man

Johnny Evil made his way down to the ring first, accompanied by Ariel. SPAMM then hit the ring, driving down in his Monkeymobile before parking it ringside. He then rolled into the ring, but Johnny started attacking him before the bell had even rung, pummeling him with a steel chair before hauling him upright and setting him up for the Making of Flubber.

Marcum: This match is over before it's even begun!

However Spandex Monkey Man reversed this move, grabbing the chair and spinning round before slamming it over Johnny's head. As Johnny went down the bell rang, and the match officially began!

SPAMM initially ignored Evil, instead grabbing Ariel and performing a Super-Slam on her. He then hoisted her onto the turnbuckle and hit a Spandex Monkey Slam off the turnbuckle to the arena floor, with a cry of 'THAT'LL keep you from interfering!'

However, Johnny had managed to get back to his feet, and as SPAMM turned back to his foe Johnny hit him with a vicious series of martial arts moves before whipping him into the ropes and hitting him with a back elbow smash. Johnny then climbed the turnbuckle and hit The Skyway to Tomorrowland, but his subsequent pin only achieved a count of 1 before SPAMM kicked out. SPAMM then climbed the turnbuckle himself and hit a Missile Dropkick, knocking Johnny to the mat. SPAMM then hit a Super-Splash before locking in a Monkey Wrench, but Johnny crawled to the ropes and secured a rope break.

Johnny's superior height and strength then came to the fore, as he proceeded to dominate the match, slamming SPAMM around before setting him up for Mr. Toad's Wild Ride. However SPAMM wriggled free and hit a Spandex Monkey Slam. The superhero then went to perform a Supersault, but Johnny rolled out of the way and SPAMM crashed to the mat.

Johnny lifted him up and set him up for The Making of Flubber, but once again Spandex Monkey Man reversed this into a chair shot to Johnny Evil. However The Legbreakers ran down to distract the ref, enraging SPAMM, who left the ring to deal with the pair. This proved to be a mistake, however, as he found himself on the receiving end of a brutal beat down before he was rolled back into the ring, where the Bastardo's executed the same triple team that put him out of action when the RDJL faced off against The Bastardos. It seemed that the match was all over, but somehow Spandex kicked out of the pin on two!

Marcum: WHAT! How on earth did he do that?!?

SPAMM crawled to the ropes and hauled himself up whilst The Bastardos looked on aghast. The Legbreakers recovered their wits and went for SPAMM, but the superhero hit Stupid Doog with a Spandex Superkick before grabbing Winged Creature and hitting him with The Spandex Monkey Slam. As Johnny Evil looked on Spandex then drew himself up to his full height and let out a cry of SPANDEX MONKEY MAN!!!

Monroe: You all know what's coming next folks!

SPAMM then performed The Might of The Monkey, knocking Johnny to the mat with a mighty thud. SPAMM then locked him in a pin, and the ref counted to the three as SPAMM secured the victory over his long-time nemesis and claimed the Lightweight belt. 'Batman' then kicked in and SPAMM hoisted the belt aloft to the cheers of the crowd.


Triple Threat Eurotrash Title Match: Nowhereman vs Chris Oakley vs El Superbeasto

Del Castillo's "Back From the Grave" cues up as Louie Bastardo leads the Giant Luchador down to ringside for the triple threat/EuroTrash title match. As the Giant and Louie prepare in ring, the music switches to Alice in Chains' "Rooster" as Chris Oakley and Ian Bond make their way to the ring. Smoldering, Oakley glares at his enormous foe, as Ian Bond attempts to regain his charge's attention.

Oakley pushes him aside and pounces on the giant, peppering with lefts and rights. Bond and Bastardo slide out to the ring floor as the match begins early. El Superbeasto shrugs off Oakley's blows and hits him with a Giant Headbutt, knocking him backwards onto the mat.

Metallica's "Creeping Death" begins to play as Nowhereman rides into the CheeseDome arena on his chopper, EuroTrash title draped over the front of the bike. Driving all the way down to ringside, Nowhereman sends both managers scurrying for safety as he nearly runs them over.

Nowhereman slides into the ring under the bottom rope and gets in both challengers faces: "Cunts!" Oakley and El Superbeasto kick him in the midsection,

Fat Retard: "STERNUM! THE STERNUM!"

And Oakley goes for a Lock N Load, but El Superbeasto grabs him by the throat. The Giant Luchador grabs Nowhereman with the other hand, and chokeslams both men at the same time!"

Monroe: "Oh my Gob!"

El Superbeasto taunts his foes while Louie yells for him to "Go for the pin! Go for the pin!" El Superbeasto attempts to pin Nowhereman, who kicks out at two. Picking the EuroTrash Champion up, El Superbeasto goes for a double-underhook suplex, but is halted by Oakley who hits a missile dropkick from the top rope!

Fat Retard: "POWERBOMB!"

Monroe & Marcum:

As Oakley mocks the Luchador (now on the mat), Nowhereman nails him from behind with an inverted DDT! Nowhereman picks Oakley up and whips him into the ropes and nails a Fucking Cuntline. Oakley hits the mat as El Superbeasto drops a Giant Elbow on the Bond Brigadier.

Nowhereman kicks the giant in the face and attempts to lock in the Crippler Cuntface on the giant beast. El Superbeasto fights his way out of it, and grabs Nowhereman, swinging him around and delivering multiple Giant Headbutts! Dazed, Nowhereman falls back into the corner as Oakley pounces on the giant Luchador, attempting to lock in a sleeper hold.

El Superbeasto flips him off onto the mat in the center of the ring and begins preparing for a GiantSault!

Monroe: "If he hits this. . ."

Marcum: "It's over! El Superbeasto's about to bring the EuroTrash title home to the Family!"

El Superbeasto bounces off the ropes, but is halted by Nowhereman who locks in a…

Fat Retard: "DROP TOEHOLD!"

Tripping up the giant and sending him crashing down to the mat on top of Oakley! Nowhereman leaps onto the pile of bodies, and Oakley's shoulders are counted down by the referee. "Creeping Death" cues up again as Nowhereman snatches the belt from the ref and starts up his bike again, riding out of the arena while Louie Bastardo and Ian Bond attempt to collect their charges.


Dark Lords vs The Company

Asylum Rules Matches are always extreme, and this one was no exception, as The Company took on The Dark Lords in a brawl that ranged all over the Cheese-Dome.

The match started deep in the bowels of the Cheese-Dome, as The Dark Lords had ambushed The Company earlier in the night and dragged them there. However The Company came roaring back, as Howlerama downed Darth with a Hostile Takeover whilst Charlie and Grimm battled it out. Charlie's famous toughness was much in evidence as Grimm cut him open with a 138 before smashing his nose in with a Crapping Wizard and still could not slow down the Company Pitbull. Eventually Howler came to his aid, hitting Grimm with a Big Business before Darth grabbed them both and hit them with a double Sabre-Slam.

The action then split. Howler, Charlie and Grimm remained where they were, whilst Highwayman and Darth took their brawl to the car park. There, Darth used his superior size and strength to dominate, slamming Highwayman around before picking him up and Sabre-Slamming him onto the Bastardo Limousine.

Marcum: That's outrageous! Darth just vandalized the Bastardo's car!

Highwayman's recent back injuries were aggravated by Darth's attack, and it looked for a while as if medical help would be required, but Highwayman was able to shake off the pain and hit a Corporate Sponsor on Darth before lifting him up and hitting a Big Business on Darth, slamming him into the concrete floor. A white limousine then drove up, and Bill Williams joined the fray wielding a baseball bat.

Meanwhile, the other three participants in the match had made it out onto the street. Howler chained Grimm to a length of park railing, allowing The Company men to dish out some damage, but Grimm wrenched himself free and dealt out a double Flatliner. He then grabbed a nearby trashcan and split Howler open with it, whilst Charlie was already wearing a crimson mask. However, El Superbeasto appeared and hit Grimm with a Chokeslam to Oblivion, allowing The Company to gather their strength and hit Grimm with a double DDT.

Back in the car park Darth was definitely up against it, as Bill Williams and Highwayman worked him over with a variety of weapons. In an attempt to regain his strength Darth headed for the ring, but Bill and The Highwayman gave chase in their limousine. Arriving in the ring just before Darth, Highwayman attacked him with a steel chair before locking in a Five-Leaf Clover. Darth was able to grab a rope to break the hold, but Highwayman simply pulled him to his feet and set him up for a Stand and Deliver. However, at that moment Grimm arrived in the ring, with Howler and Charlie hot on his heels.

As the Company worked over the Dark Lords in the ring, Ennio Morricone's "Ecstasy of Gold" began to play and the Bastardo Family headed down to ringside and join the Company in beating down the Dark Lords!

They chained up Grimm and Darth and started working them over. Howlerama wrapped a chain around Darth's neck and hanged him over the ropes!

Darth's body was tossed over the ring ropes, as Highwayman hung him with the motorcycle chain, still wrapped around the Dark Lord's neck! Darth struggled to escape as Howler, Charlie, and the Legbreakers pounded on him outside the ring.

Balls Nasty then made his way down the ramp, as back in the ring, the Family and Company members turned their attention towards Grimm. Ariel tossed Johnny Evil a chair and he hit the Making of Flubber on Grimm! Then Superbeasto picked him up and delivered the Chokeslam to Oblivion! Balls Nasty picked him up and delivered a Camero Cut! Charlie hit him with a Tower of London! Stupid Doog and Winged Creature nailed him with Taking Out the Trash! Joe Mama picked him up and planted him with an East Coast Hammer! Following right up, Snarf landed on Grimm with a Wildsault!

Monroe: "My Gob! This is uncalled for! This isn't a match, it's an assault!"

Marcum: "They asked for it by constantly interfering in other people's business!"

Monroe: "How did they ask for this? No one asks for a beating like this!"

It looked like the end for the Dark Lords when Captain Sammitch and PenWing came barreling down the ramp with kendo sticks and Sherwoods at the ready. The rest of SD-6 followed them, and the group immediately made its presence felt, as pieces of wood began flying everywhere. Nowhereman and Captain Howdy joined in the fray as well, before RDCW officials and security guards separated the participants.

General Manager the Doctor conferred with Senior Official Lothar before deciding that the match would be ruled a draw as it became too out of control to continue