Interlude
Monroe: Well, folks, so far it’s been one HELL of a night!
Madman: You said it, Monroe! The Family/Company alliance! Balls Nasty joining the Company! Spandex Monkey Man’s improbably upset over the great Johnny Evil…
Monroe: I don’t think “improbable” is really the word, Marcum…
Madman: Well, call it what you want, Monroe, but I think…
The announcers are interrupted as the Cheese-O-Tron comes to life. The fans see the image of the same familiar-looking office as from a month or so ago. Sitting behind the desk is a familiar-looking man. Behind him is an image of the “RDCW” logo, crossed out. There’s a nameplate that says “RDCW Owner & CEO” on it.
Off-Camera Voice: Okay…you’re on sir!
Billionaire Vince: Ladies and Gentlemen…fans of the RDCW…and I use those titles as mutually exclusive…let me re-introduce myself. I am the richest man in Sports Entertainment. I am the man who owns the biggest “wrasslin’” promotion in the world. And, within one moth’s time, I will be Owner and CEO of the RDCW!!!
The fans are booing.
BV: You see, a few months ago, I came to your owner, Rob Kamphoos…Kamfoh…Kampy…dammit(!!!), I went to ROB(!!!)…and offered him a sizeable amount for this promotion that is infringing on my fans and making me and mine look pretty damn foolish! He refused – rather rudely – and told me that the RDCW wasn’t for sale!!!
The fans are cheering and chanting “BOBO!!!”
BV: But I’m not a man who takes no for an answer. Not from my competitors. Not from my family. And certainly not from that 15-year-old Thai boy with the pretty mouth and nice, tight…
OC: SIR!!!
BV: (regains focus) Uh, sorry. My point is this: Your owner and his wrestlers made me look like a damn idiot a while ago! You made my son-in-law look stupider than he already does! And, at Havoc, one of your jobbers (the fans chant “CHARLIE!!!) made one of my big studs…oh, he’s so big…so, uh…ahem!!!…made one of my Champions look damned stupid! And I won’t have it!!! I’m a Billionaire, dammit!!! A big, gay, genetic jackhammer of a Billionaire!!! And what I want, I get!!! (Looks off-camera) Get me John Semen and Bitch Status…NOW!!! Daddy wants some love!!!
OC: Yes sir…
As the crowd boos, Billionaire Vince regains his composure.
BV: So consider this the official “hostile takeover” announcement. By the end of May, the RDCW WILL be part of my company! And I will do everything in my power to squash all these wrestlers you love so much in favor of my vision of “Sports Entertainment”! And I’ll hold you ALL in my little hands!!!
He holds up a pair of Barbie doll hands. His eyes gleam as he stares down at them.
BV: All mine…you’ll all be mine…Enjoy the month, you idiots because, by the end of May, you all be INVADED(!!!)…by the Worst…Wrasslin’…EVER!!!
The picture cuts out
Monroe: People, we’re sorry about that. Don’t believe everything you hear.
Madman: I’m sure our boss, the Phenomenal Rob Kamphausen, has something planned to combat this potential attack!
Monroe: I’m sure our roster will have something to say about it…
Madman: Uh, Mike? Are we screwed?
Monroe: No…not yet. But Bret and Matt were…
