*"It's time to play the Gay-muh!" starts playing and crowd errupts in booes as Crippled-H and Grand Wizard Dick Hair walk down the ramp. Dick Hair holds the ropes for Crips, who has a mic in his hand.*
Crips: None of you thought I would be here. None of you thought Crippled-H would return after my last visit to this crap-hole. Well here I am! You can't have a real pay-per-view without the Gay-mah! And I am the Gay-muh! I am the greatest wrestler in the history of the WWE! No one has fought harder, bled more, and won more than me! And there is not one person backstage who can beat me one-on-one! You think this nobody PenWing can take me on? You think he has what it takes to beat the Gay-muh? He's got nothing on me!
*The crowd booes as Crips hands the mic over to Grand Wizard Dick Hair.*
Dick: You people, and I use that term loosely, need to shut up! You know nothing! This man standing before you is the Gay-muh! There is no such thing as a title match if he's not in it! That's how good he is! This PenWing doesn't even deserve to be in the same ring with the Gay-muh!
*The crowd continues to boo as Crippled-H takes the mic back.*
Crips: That's right, Dick. That's why I'm not going to wrestle PenWing tonight! It's beneath me to face him!
*Dick Hair nods. The crowd starts chanting for PenWing.*
Crips: That's right! There is no way I'm going to get in this ring with PenWing tonight...unless he first proves his worth and defeats the Grand Wizard Dick Hair!
*Dick Hair is startled by this, and starts talking to Crips as the crowd booes.*
*Suddenly, the stomping beat of "We Will Rock You" blasts over the speakers and the fans roar to their feet and sing along as PenWing and Meeko make their way to the ring. PenWing is wearing the Tag Team Donkey Lovin' Title around his waist, with the Big Cheese Belt draped over his shoulder. Meeko is sporting a lovely referee tank top with black hip-hugging pants, and she is raising PenWing's Sherwood abover her head.*
Buddy you're a boy make a big noise
Playin' in the street gonna be a big man some day
You got mud on yo' face
You big disgrace
Kickin' your can all over the place
Singin'
'We will we will rock you'
'We will we will rock you'
Everybody
'We will we will rock you'
'We will we will rock you'
Alright
*PenWing takes a mic, holds the ropes for Meeko to enter the ring, and then follows suit.*
PenWing: So, you're the Gay-muhtherfucker?
*Pops from the crowd as Crips looks on in anger.*
PenWing: And you say no one has fought harder, bled more, and won more than you?
*The crowd booes.*
PenWing: And you want me to prove myself by beating up your little Dickie here first?
*The crowd begins to chant "Asshole."*
Crips: (as he backs out of the ring) That's right! If you can beat him, you get to face me!
PenWing: It sounds more like no one cries harder, whines louder, and cowers more than you!
*The crowd erupts in cheer as Crips drops to the floor leaving Dick Hair alone in the ring.*
PenWing: I figured you would try and pull something like this.
*PenWing drops the mic and runs at Hair as Meeko signals the bell, but Hair gets in a quick rake to the eye. He then slaps PenWing across the chest. PenWing slaps him back. PenWing then grabs Hair's arm and whips him into the corner, following it up with a spear for a vicious Drag 'n Whip. PenWing goes for the pin but Hair rakes his other eye, and PenWing roles over. Hair tries to get a quick pin, but PenWing kicks out.*
Monroe: This is the most disgusting wrestling I have ever seen!
Marcum: What did you expect? They're from Worst Wrestling Ever!
*Hair tries to lock in a figure four, but PenWing manages to break out and get back to his feet. Hair moves in close and PenWing stuns him with Sudden Death. A three-count later and Meeko declairs PenWing the winner. She hands him the mic.*
PenWing: I'll be seeing you later tonight, Crips, because anytime, anywhere, (the crowd chants) SUDDEN DEATH RULES!
*The crowd roars as "Gonna Fly Now" starts playing and PenWing helps Meeko out of the ring. He raises both titles as they walk back up the ramp. Crips reenters the ring and helps Dick Hair back to his feet. He glares at PenWing and Meeko, but is left speechless, not that anyone would have heard him over the crowd.*
<sub>Will Eisner's last work -
The Plot: The Secret Story of the Protocols of the Elders of ZionRDCW Profile"Well, as it happens, I
wrote the damned SOP," Illescue half snarled, "and as of now, you can bar those jackals from
any part of this facility until Hell's a hockey rink! Is that perfectly clear?!" - Dr. Franz Illescue -
Honor Harrington: At All Costs"I don't know what I'm do, or how I do, I just do." -
Alexander Ovechkin</sub>
