Backstage interviewer Chesty Lerou is seen backstage, getting ready to interview DCMB World Champion MisterJLA. JLA's belt is fastened slightly below his waist...

JLA: You know, Chesty, I'd like to get in a wrestling contest with those great big ol' t....

Cameraman:: And we're on!

Chesty: JLA, in your next match, you will be defending your coveted DCMB World Championship against your #1 contender, Chris Oakley. Some say you've ducking Oakley ever since you signed on with the RDCW. Your comments?

JLA: I couldn't avoid Oakley if I tried. He's always bothering just about everybody backstage, going on and on about how wonderful he and the Bong Brigade are.

Chesty: You mean "The Bond Brigade".

JLA: Whatever. Point is, Oakley's been begging for a shot at my title for quite some time, and now he's going to get what he wanted. Well, not really. He'll get his shot at my belt, but he's also going to get his brains beat in. Bank on it.

Chesty: Aren't you worried about dealing with Oakley's trusted manager, Ian St. John Bond? Then there's the rest of The Bond Brigade...

JLA: My tag partner...check that...my undefeated tag partner, Captain Howdy will be in my corner. The Allied Powers will stand united at this upcoming Havoc.

Chesty: Speaking of the Powers, many are still trying to figure out how you managed to eliminate The Insane Liberal before your last tag match. Both you and Howdy were under constant surveillance. How did you do it, and do you have similar plans for Ian St. John Bond?

JLA: You really expect me to answer that? Let's just say that I always have a Plan B. The Allied Powers are going for the tag gold, and this belt is staying around my waist.

Chesty: Speaking of which, can you take your belt off, so we can get a closer look at it? It looks very beautiful.

JLA: Uh...sorry. No.

Chesty: Oh, come on. Take off your belt, and hold it in front of the camera.

JLA: I don't think that's such a great idea.

JLA tries to cover his midsection with his arms.

Chesty: Don't be so protective of your belt. Let your two fans see it closer.

Chesty tries to take the belt off the Champ's waist, be recoils in horror when she does.

Chesty: Dear God! You pervert! You're...

JLA: Excited to be talking to you, that's correct.

Chesty: Cover yourself up! But I must admit, I'm surprised that your tights haven't ripped because of that thing. So JLA, do you have any final comments about your next opponent?

JLA: Yes, I do. This is the point in the interview, when I'm supposed to make fun of Oakley, and tell everyone that's he beneath me. I already promised that I'll defeat him, but I'm going to do something else: I'm going to give Oakley his due.

Chesty: Really?

JLA: Of course. Oakley has the heart of a champion. He's a former Hardcore Porn and Intercuntinental title holder. His arsenal of moves is quite impressive: whether it's the The Splendid Splinter, The Big Dig, or his painful Logan Express, Oakley is a tough competitor. I can't think of a more worthy opponent that could challenge me for my championship.

Well, except for PJP. And Joe Mama. Can't forget Captain Sammitch. PenWing looks tough, too. Grimm's a bad dude. Then there's Chewy Walrus. And rex. But other than those guys, Oakley has to be the most worthy contender around.

Chesty: This is Chesty Lerou, signing off...

JLA: ....completely forgot about Nowhereman! And Charlie, Winged Creature, and his tag partner, Stupid Dogg! But then there's Johnny Evil. How in the world can I forget El Superbeasto???

Cameraman: And...cut!

JLA: Highwayman probably deserves a match before Oakley, and Darth, too. Then there's...