*The stomping beat of "We Will Rock You" blasts over the speakers and the fans roar to their feet and sing along as PenWing, with the Big Cheese Belt around his waist and his Sherwood in hand makes his way to the ring.*
Buddy you're a boy make a big noise
Playin' in the street gonna be a big man some day
You got mud on yo' face
You big disgrace
Kickin' your can all over the place
Singin'
'We will we will rock you'
'We will we will rock you'
Everybody
'We will we will rock you'
'We will we will rock you'
Alright
PenWing: Now that's an entrance! I never thought I'd be rooting for a Company man, but Darth, if you don't finish Oakley off back there, I will! I'm tired of all of this upstaging shit. Tonight isn't about SD-6. It's not about the Family Business. It's not about the Bond Brigade. Hell, it's not even about the Big Cheese Belt! In fact, the only reason the RDCW is involved in this event, is because so many of our wrestlers started with Evil Cunt Wrestling, and World's Worst Wrestling was too stupid to capitalize on it and bring all of this talent together at once. And the reason we're all here, is for you, the fans!
*Huge pop from the crowd.*
PenWing: I am in awe of what we will be seeing tonight. How long has it been since the Timelords stepped in the ring together? And then there are the Hellions! And that's just to name a few! And me? I get to be a part of this! It's like a dream for a kid like me! In just a few minutes, I'm going to be participating in the Junkyard Invitational. When I signed up for this match, I had no idea what it was. I figured, if I was good enough to be a Hardcore Porn Champion, I could compete in this. Turns out, it's a battle royal, and it's probably going to get very bloody. But don't worry, I've got my trusty Sherwood in hand, and, well, I know where to find more.
*The crowd chuckles at PenWing's comment.*
PenWing: Tonight, this is definately a dream for me. But for you, Chris Oakley, it's going to be a nightmare. You crossed the line, Oakers. You put a member of SD-6 in danger, and you did it to further your own personal war. Let me make this simple. I don't care about XPW. I don't care about Rod Blueballs and his bitch, Lezzie Barwhore. I don't care that you're a face, united with us in a war against the Family Business. Tonight, it's not about...family. Tonight, it's just about business! And believe me, Oakers, this business of ours, it's just getting started! You see, Oakers, you made a big mistake when you came to the RDCW. You didn't read the rules. Oh, sure, you glanced over the contract, but you had no idea what you were signing. So I'm going to spell it out for you. Now pay attention! The rules of the game are simple. And everyone knows them!
*The crowd cheers, expecting PenWing to lead them in the chant, but he pauses.*
PenWing: (almost in a whisper) You want a war, Oakers? All right. I'm going to end this once and for all. Even though you lost your MOD Tournament match, I'm going to give you your dream shot. In two weeks, I'm going to give you...Rage in a Cage II. (raises his voice) You and me, Oakers. One-on-one. And when I'm through with you, and your bloody carcass is lying on the floor of the ring, there won't be an XPW Championship anymore. Because it will be consumed by the Big Cheese Belt! Wiped off the face of the Earth, just like XPW, when Paul Hyman kills it tonight! If it's war you want, Oakers, you better believe you're going to get it! Because, anytime, anywhere, (the crowd chants) SUDDEN DEATH RULES!
*The crowd roars as "Gonna Fly Now" blasts over the speakers and PenWing leaves the ring.*
