*Bad Company plays as Balls Nasty walks down the ramp to the ring. Cradled in his right arm is the DCMB belt covered with a cloth. Ring announcer and interviewer James White is waiting in the center of the ring.*

James: Before we start the interview, I want to thank the RDCW for that vacation they sent me on. And to the Roboken District Courthouse, I'd like to say that I've complied 100% with the terms of my plea bargin.

So, Balls, Mister JLA had some intense remarks for you out here earlier tonight. What do you say to his accusations of cheating and his remarks about your mother?

Nasty: James, if JLA wants to steal his promo material from Oakley, that's fine by me.

As far as his whining about the match and losing his belt, I have two things to say to him. First, this is wrestling. This isn't you playing in your grandma's attic, putting on her old dresses, and pretending to be a fairy princess like you're used to, JLA. Save that for your weekends. This is sport of strength, discipline, and fortitude. When you step into the ring, it's time to put up or shut up. Not acting like some damned circus clown. It's about wrestling. Something you know nothing about. Something that obviously isn't a priority at the DCMB.

I understand what this is really about, JLA. You are a one trick pony. You do your song and dance routine for the audience and then go for your finishing move. I did what any real wrestler would have done. I cut you off from the only weapon in your arsenal. You can't make it on your own without it, so now you feel your own uselessness creeping up on you. Pay attention, JLA. Consider it an omen for the future of your career.

Secondly, of course I cheated, you little shit. Haven't you ever seen one of my matches?

James: I noticed a little reluctance for you to accept your title at the end of your match.

Nasty: James, I went back and listened to what I said prior to that match. How I talked about the DCMB title as nothing but an ad space for the huge conglomerate that does its best to run wrestling into the ground. Since winning it, I've thought long and hard about what I said and what this title means. I've decided to treat it with all the respect it deserves and display it in a fashion befitting its legacy.

*Balls Nasty removes the cloth from the belt. In the center of the belt is a poster that says "EAT AT JOES".*

That's right, ladies and gentlemen. This week's sponsor of the DCMB title is Joe's Chicken and Donut Shack. Roboken's premier stop for fried chicken and donuts. How can one place offer such a great choice between deep fried poultry and the sugary goodness of donuts? It's simple. They cook it all in the same grease. Joe's Chicken and Donut Shack. Just five miles south of the Cheesedome.

James: You're using the belt to sell ad space?

Nasty: I said it on the last Havoc, James. This belt is nothing but a billboard, and I'm going to treat it as such. After all, this belt doesn't mean anything else. I might as well get something for my troubles, having to carry it around in public. I decided that I'd much rather get paid for selling shitty goods than have to bear the humiliation of being the DCMB champion.

Now, I have to go gear up for my MOD match against Pig Iron. Tonight, this little piggy is going to the hospital.