*sigh* today would have been three years for me and my ex. i had a trip planed out for baltimore this week too i was gonna surprise him with. but yea, oh well.
did i tell the story about went i had his stuff delivered on monday? *looking* up, yep i did back on page 5.
so then i get a phone call some hours later, around 7 i think it was anywho doesnt matter, from my ex. he was angry about the note i wrote him. in it i told him i knew he was lying to me and that was unexceptable, that he still has some responsiblities to me and he has to grow up and take care of them. then i said i need the truth. well he got all upset because he claims he hasnt lyed to me. i said well you sugarcoat things and thats the same thing. then he asked me about what i thought he was. well i said about the girl. he said he wasnt dateing her they where just hanging out that i knew of this girl cause its the girl that he worked with from his last job who played D&D with her and he said her name. well i knew OF her i didnt know anything about her other than she PLAYED D&D. i didnt know he was playing with her or her name or anything. i said well how was i sapsoto know you dont tell me anything. he continued to get mad. i was scared hes never taking that tone with me EVER, it hurt. so i didnt use and angry tone or anything cause i didnt want to get into a shouting match which weve NEVER done. he said well how did you find out anyway, i told him i saw them at the mall, he got angry and said when, well i didnt remember, and hes like oh yea we did go to the mall that day didnt we. i didnt know what day he was talking about. so that was pretty much that, i asked him to try not to be angry. he said hed try that hes at his buddys house and he has to go and that hell call me later. he also said that me saying he lyed hurt mor than, and then he mombled something. so that was that.
i cryed, like i said it hurt, hes never talked to me that way before. so then i called my buddy (new guy) and he calmed me down. i got on the internet and talked to meeko and princess and others. cause i didnt want to talk to him so i figuer id flood the phone line. later around midnight i get off cause my new guy was at the door. it was his buddies bday, they where drinking and wanted to know if i wanted to go to eatnpark with them to sobor up. well i said sure. so we hoped in the car that another buddie was driving so the four of us went. later i get home late and find a message from my ex. he sounded really depressed or tired i dunno, and he said he wanted to know if i wanted to talk. i havent called him since.
later that night i got off the net cause my new guy was at the door it was his buddies bday and they where drinking and wanted to know if i wanted to go to eatnpark with them to sobor up. well i said sure. so we hoped in the car that another buddie was driving and the four of us went.
when i got home it was late and there was a message on the machine from my ex. he sounded depressed or tired. wanting to know if i wanted to talk.
*sigh* i dont but i do. because of my week, im not gonna be emotionally stable, so i dont want to get hurt again. as it is all this has tkin a toll on my body.
i dunno if he was angry cause he was tring to justify something hes done, wether it did really hurt because he did or just in gerneral. my feelings tell me that hes has done something but i dunno what. i think hes done something with another girl wether it was the one girl that plays D&D or another one. oh he also said he wasnt even sure he was gonna hang out with her but now he is. i thought he ment cause we broke up but i dunno.
*sigh*
i got some of my stuff back but not all so ill have to get them later. he gave my car blanket back and well.. it was... muddy. like it waqs placed on the ground and then walked on. why would he have used it? and why would he have not washed or something so i wouldnt have known? its not making any sence. i mean i know hes not that smart about covering his tracks but i would think if hes saying hes not lying to me about seeing someone he wouldnt do things to make me think he was. i dunno.
and why would he not want to tell me he has a cell phone? and how the heck did he get one? we couldnt get one before. i mean i couldnt call his moms house to get him cause well they arnt to happy about me. so then i emailed but he said his moms comp is messed up and he coulnt read them. so then i called his buddy but he deosnt asnwer when i call so i leave a voice mail and then my ex calls me. why not save me the trouble and just give me his number. the other night the first time we talked he told me he was on a cordless phone when clearly he was on his cell phone. why not just tell me.. its not like im gonna call everyday or every five minutes and harasse him. oh and he gave his number to my new guy, cause he was deleiveing his stuff, but not me. so duh, yeah im gonna get it off him. i dont know why he didnt think that i wouldnt. thats how i got a hold of him when we talked about the lying thing cause i was well, on the potty and missed his call. i forgot to mention that, well more like trying to make a long story short.
i dunno hes changed and alot of things are just not adding up right.
