*The Cheese-o-tron flashes to life to show Balls Nasty drinking a beer in a Honky Tonk somewhere in the White Trash District of Roboken.*
I'm not at the Cheesdome tonight because I don't have a match this week. But what kind of DCMB champion would I be if I didn't remind all of you people to call your good friends at Dewey, Cheetum, and Howe, Attorney's at Law.
*He raises the DCMB belt into view to show a picture of the three lawyers and their logo strapped to the center of the title.*
If you've been in a car wreck, an on the job accident, or any other mishap through no fault of your own..... Hell, even if it is your own damned fault, call the crack team of Dewey, Cheetum, and Howe. If you're hurt, someone needs to get sued; and these are the guys to do it. With over 40 combined disbarment hearings between them, they've proven just how for they'll go to get you that big fat check that you probably don't deserve. Just listen to this satisfied customer.
*Nasty grabs a guy's arm and pulls him into frame. The guy looks confused as Nasty points just to the side of the camera. The guy leans forward and squints. He then obviously begins reading something in a very slow, monotone voice.*
My life was turned upside down when, through no fault of my own, my pants spon....tan.....e.....ously combusted. I received sever burns all over my body. I could not perform my duties at work or at home. My inability to sexually satisfy my husband almost led to a divorce. Then the offices of Dewey, Cheetum, and Howe stepped in. They proved that the zipper created too much friction and ignited the spark that sent my jeans into a roaring inferno. Now, I've got a huge settlement, corrective surgery, and a husband that loves me.
*The man looks even more confused after reading the cue card. Balls Nasty shoves him out of the frame.*
So remember Dewey, Cheetum, and Howe Attorney's at Law. Because if something happens, no matter what, they'll prove in court that you're not responsible for it.
