MOD Tournament: Joe Mama versus TK-069

These two former friends locked up for the first time since their #1 Contender’s Match for the Eurotrash Title. TK-069 was no match for the more vicious Bastardo Family Enforcer. Joe Mama used his Greco-Roman roots to keep TK-069 off his feet, and his brutal high-impact slams and suplexes to keep the advantage. After executing a textbook Enforcer to drive TK-069 into the mat, Joe Mama hit him with a Flying Tea Bag Slam to get the pin and move on in the tournament.


The Cell From Hell: PenWing versus Chris Oakley

Back from break, the barbed wire steel cage has been lowered around the ring area.

Monroe: Buhgawd! Folks, we are just moments away from witnessing the first ever Cell from Hell!

Marcum: Two men will enter the barbed wire steel cage, and once it's locked, it stays that way until one or both wrestlers stay down for a ten-count!

Monroe: But before PenWing and Chris Oakley make their way to the ring, we await the arrival of the special gatekeeper! Who will The Doctor entrust to prevent any and all interference in this match?!?

James White is standing in the ring, mic in hand.

James White: Ladies and Gentlemen, the following main event, the Cell from Hell, is for the unification of the RDCW Heavyweight Cheese Title and the XPW World Heavyweight Title. This is a hard-core, last man standing match! Introducing first, the special gatekeepers-

Monroe: Keepers?

Just as Monroe stops speaking the lights go out in the CheeseDome. They are replaced by a red glow, and "The Imperial March" blasts over the speakers as the Dark Lords rise from beneath the stage.

James White: Grimm and Darth, the Dark Lords!

Monroe: Buhgawd! The Dark Lords are the special gatekeepers!

Marcum: After what happened earlier tonight, they may be the only one's suited for this job!

Grimm and Darth make their way to the cage door, where Lothar hands them the lock and key. The Dark Lords position themselves on either side of the cage door, facing the ramp, and wait.

James White: Now, introducing the XPW World Heavyweight Champion, Chris Oakley!

"Rooster" blasts over the speakers and Chris Oakley rides up on one of Ian Bond's Triumph motorcycles. The crowd gives him a mixed reaction. He parks the bike on the ramp, and walks up to the cage. After admiring it for a moment, Oakley enters the cage and walks up the steps to the ring. He holds up the XPW title for the crowd.

James White: Now, your Heavyweight Cheese Champion, PenWing!

The stomping beat of "We Will Rock You" blasts over the speakers and the fans roar to their feet and sing along as PenWing, with the Big Cheese Belt around his waist and his Sherwood in hand, makes his way to the ring.

Buddy you're a boy make a big noise
Playin' in the street gonna be a big man some day

You got mud on yo' face
You big disgrace

Kickin' your can all over the place

Singin'
'We will we will rock you'

'We will we will rock you'

Everybody
'We will we will rock you'

'We will we will rock you'

Alright

PenWing walks right past the Dark Lords and enters the ring. He removes the Big Cheese Belt from his waist and holds it up for the crowd. Lothar then takes both belts and hands to James White, who exits the cage. Darth closes the cage door and Grimm locks the chain in place, sealing the only way in or out of the Cell from Hell. Lothar signals for the bell, and Oakley wastes no time charging PenWing. He sends him into the ropes with rights and then grabs his arm to whip him to the other ropes. PenWing reverses the move, and nails Oakley with the Drag 'n’ Whip. PenWing quickly goes to work, punching Oakley repeatedly on the mat.

Monroe: PenWing is continuing right where these two left off in the hall last week!

Marcum: Oakley's gonna have to do something fast before PenWing knocks his lights out!

Oakley manages to get a hold of PenWing's hand and he kicks him off and over him, onto the mat. As Oakley slowly gets back to his feet, PenWing flips up to his own, and quickly hits a Spin-o-Rama, but Oakley catches PenWing's leg, and throws him into the corner ropes. Oakley then runs at PenWing and clotheslines him, sending both of them out of the ring and to the ground. Oakley is first to get back to his feet and he runs at PenWing, picking him up and slamming his back into the barbed wire steel cage, tearing PenWing's jersey.

Marcum: First blood!

Oakley leaves PenWing and walks back to ring. He reaches under and pulls out a couple of trashcans with lids. Oakley walks over to PenWing, who has fallen to his knee, and swings the trash can down on him. PenWing gets his arm up, and amazingly dents the trash can. Oakley tosses it aside, but PenWing grabs Oakley's arm and whips him face first into the cage.

Monroe: Now Oakley's bleeding!

PenWing walks around the ring and reaches under, pulling out a Sherwood. He walks over to Oakley and breaks it on him with a British Columbia Two-Hander. PenWing then walks over to get the other trashcan, but when he turns around, Oakley hits him with one of the lids. As PenWing recovers, Oakley throws the other lid behind him, and hits PenWing with the Full Metal Jacket, right onto the lid. Oakley then throws the unused trashcan into the ring, and rolls in under the ropes. He grabs the trash and climbs the corner turnbuckle. Oakley jumps, holding the trash can in front, but PenWing manages to roll out of the way just as Oakley lands, causing him to miss the WMD.

PenWing slowly gets back to his feet. He walks over to Oakley and grabs his arm. PenWing then pulls and sends Oakley into the ring steps. PenWing then reaches under the ring and pulls out another Sherwood. He swings, breaking it on Oakley's knee. PenWing then helps Oakley back to his feet, and over to the cage. PenWing slams Oakley into the cage, violently. He then uses his foot to hold Oakley's knee against the barbed wire. Oakley tries to fight back, and manages to push PenWing off of him.

Monroe: Oakley finally got out of that hold, but the damage has been done!

Oakley limps over to the ring and reaches under, pulling out a baseball bat. He walks over to PenWing and swings the bat, but again PenWing raises his arm and somehow blocks the bat without hurting himself. PenWing grabs Oakley's arm and sends the bat into the ring. He then whips Oakley into the ring post. After a moment, PenWing helps Oakley slide back into the ring. Oakley crawls for the bat while PenWing reaches under he ring.

Monroe: Oakley has the bat!

PenWing is looking down at something in his hands, just below the ring apron. Oakley approaches him and stands ready with the bat. PenWing yells something at Oakley, causing him to lose composure. He runs at PenWing, who produces a fire extinguisher. PenWing sprays Oakley, slowing him down just enough to be able to enter the ring and dive at his knee with the fire extinguisher.

Marcum: PenWing is destroying Oakley's knee! I've never seen the knucklehead work someone over this vicously before!

PenWing grabs Oakley's legs and locks in the Sharpshooter. Oakley screams in pain. He tries to pull PenWing to the ropes, but PenWing manages to move them to the center of the ring. Just as it looks like Oakley is about to pass out, he looks over and sees the bat lying on the mat. Oakley uses all of his strength to reach for it. He grabs the bat and swings at PenWing's knee, causing him to release the hold. Oakley rolls out of the ring, still holding the bat. He collects himself on the ground. PenWing exits the ring on the other side, and grabs a steel chair from under the ring. He walks around to Oakley, but they both swing at the same time. Oakley grabs PenWing and pulls him against the cage face first, shredding the front of his jersey. He follows it with a splash. Oakley then walks over to the ring and slides out a table. As PenWing recovers, Oakley sets the table up outside the ring. He then walks back to PenWing. PenWing punches him, but Oakley gives it right back. The two continue to trade blows. Oakley finally grabs PenWing's arm and whips him into the ring post. Close enough to the table, Oakley lifts PenWing up and Red Alert's him right through it. Oakley then goes to another side of the ring and pulls out another table.

Marcum: What is Oakley doing? He should be waiting inside the ring for the ten count!

Oakley walks over to PenWing and helps him back to his feet. He sends him face first into the steel cage again, and then hits him with a DDT onto the ground. Oakley half drags, half carries PenWing to the other table, and lays him on top of it. Oakley then pulls out a ladder and sets it up. He climbs up and jumps, but PenWing has had enough time to recover, and he rolls out of the way. Oakley goes through the table, but he misses connecting the Kill 'Em All on PenWing.

Marcum: Oakley just put himself through the table!

With both wrestlers lying on the ground, Lothar begins the count. He gets to seven, and both wrestlers are almost to their feet. PenWing strikes first, spearing Oakley into the ring apron. He then lifts Oakley up and slides him under the ropes. PenWing rolls in right after him. Before Oakley can get fully back to his feet, PenWing takes control with the Spin-o-Rama Lock.

Monroe: PenWing has Oakley in a headlock! How much more can he take?!?

Oakley pulls PenWing forward, flipping him over and onto the mat, and breaking the hold. From here, the match takes an interesting turn, as the two wrestlers begin to work each other over on the mat with textbook technical holds. Knowing there are no pin counts, the two take as many liberties as they can, trying to wear each other down. Finally, Oakley is able to set up the Lock and Load, but PenWing manages to spin Oakley around and hit lock on for a perfect belly to back Meekoplex. PenWing hits a second Meekoplex, and a third.

The crowd counts: Four! Five! Six!

Oakley breaks the hold on the sixth, and manages to get around PenWing to lock in Snuff the Rooster.

Marcum: Oakley is snuffing the life out of the knucklehead!

Monroe: I thought you said you were going to root for PenWing tonight?

Marcum: I'm rooting for a tie! It won't be long before both of these idiots take each other out for the full ten count! Then King Snarf can just win the MOD tournament to reclaim his title!

Monroe: We don't even know if he's in the MOD tournament!

Marcum: Oh, he's in it all right! You'll see!

Monroe: Right now, I see PenWing about to be counted out!

As if on cue, PenWing comes back to life with a double elbow to Oakley's sides. Oakley releases the old for a moment. He then reaches around PenWing again, and turns so that they are both facing the corner turnbuckle. Oakley tries to lift PenWing into a suplex, but PenWing nails Oakley with a Gordie Howe, bloodying his nose. Oakley loosens his hold, and PenWing reaches back for Oakley's head. He holds Oakley's head in a face lock against his shoulder for Sudden Death, but instead of dropping down, he runs towards the corner and runs up the ring ropes with the face lock still applied. PenWing kicks off the top rope and back flips the over Oakley, driving him down onto the back of his head.

Monroe: Buhgawd! PenWing hit the Winged Wheel!

PenWing gets back to his feet and climbs over the ropes and up the ladder, still standing just outside the ring. At the top, PenWing removes his shredded jersey, revealing brass elbow pads.

Monroe: Buhgawd! The package was brass elbow pads! That was PenWing's surprise for Oakley!

Marcum: That's fucked up! That ain't right!

Monroe: But it's legal!

PenWing leaps off the ladder and nails Oakley with the High Holy Howe! Lothar starts counting. PenWing is still down at four.

Marcum: I think PenWing may have taken himself out with that last stunt! We're gonna have a tie!

At seven, PenWing finally gets back to his feet. Oakley stays down.

The crowd helps Lothar complete the count: Nine! Ten!

Lothar signals the bell, and Grimm unlocks the cage. James White enters the ring with the titles as "Gonna Fly Now" blasts over the speakers. SD-6 comes running down the ring to celebrate PenWing's victory as Havoc comes to a close.