*We come back from commercial to a shot of Marcum and Monroe at the announce table*
Marcum: I'm sure a lot of you are wondering where Johnny Evil is tonight.
Monroe: What do you mean? We go weeks at a time without seeign that weirdo.
Marcum: Do you mind? I'm trying to do an intro here.
Monroe: Fine, fine. Don't let me stop you.
Marcum: As I was bout to say, Johnny Evil...
Monroe: I mean, how long has it been since he's actually said anything? He's been in matches, sure. He's won title matches. Doesn't it seem strange that he hasn't even been making a big deal about his title wins?
Marcum: Are you done?
Monroe: Yeah.
Marcum: OK, then...
Monroe: Sure he's supposed to be a little on the crazy side, but not saying anything? At all? It's just very out of character...
Marcum: SHUT UP! Geez! Can we just get to the stinking video? God!
Monroe: I'm sorry, I just think...
Marcum: WE ALL KNOW WHAT YOU THINK! We're never goign to get to the video if you don't shut up! Yes! IT'S STRANGE! OK? COME ON!
Monroe: Well, if you feel that way. I'm sorry. Do your little intro.
Marcum: In celebration of Johnny Evil's latest win, he and Ariel decided to get married! We have a video of the highlights of their lavish Las Vegas ceremony!
Monroe: That non-posting dink...
*Marcum glares at Monroe as we cut to the video.*
Marcum (voice over): Here you can see some of the guests at this special occasion. Including yours truely.
Monroe: I wasn't invited.
Marcum: I wonder why...
*The video shows a large crowd of people gathered, including members of Family Business.*
Monroe: It wasn't just Johnny Evil's business partners, or their familys there. There was also many of the biggest names in Las Vegas!
*The video shows a heavily bandaged, unrecognizable man.*
Looks like he's still recovering from the tiger attack...
*Two Blue Men*
It was a last minute decision, so one of them had a prior engagement...
*A freaky looking French Canadian Mime in a giant wheel, a man dressed up as Bette Middler, an unbelievable tall and fat man dressed up as Elvis, a couple pirates, a Roman Emperor and...*
Monroe: Is that Wayne Newton?
Marcum: Yeah, sadly the Wayne Newton impersonator couldn't make it and they had to settle for him.
*Johnny Evil is then shown standing by the altar with a Klingon.*
Monroe: A Star Trek ceremony, how classy...
Marcum: You're really bitchy today, y'know that?
*Ariel enters, looking great in her dress.*
Monroe (laughing): A white dress! Man, that's good!
Marcum: Quiet, this is the best part...
*Suddenly, Spandex Monkey Man enters!*
Spamm: I cannot let such an evil union take place!
*Spamm charges them but he's hit by a chair! The camera pulls back to show that it was swung by the enormous Elvis!*
Johnny Evil (talkign to Ariel): I was going to tell you later, but our present from Family Business is a bodyguard to watch you during my matches. Ariel, I'd like you to meet Big Fat Elvis
Ariel: Very nice to meet you.
Big Fat Elvis: The pleasure is all mine, mama. Does anyone have a cheeseburger?
Johnny Evil: In a minute. First, take out the trash...
*BFE picks up Spamm and carries him out.*
*We cut back to Monroe and Marcum.*
Marcum: The rest of the ceremony went off without a hitch! Johnny Evil and Ariel are now on an all expences paid trip to Walt Disney World, thanKs to Johnny Evil's good friend Michael Eisner.
Monroe: Friends with Michael Eisner! Are there no evil depths he won't sink to? This whole bodyguard thing is just a sham! as if it isn't distracting enought that he has Ariel at ringside AND he has the unfair advantage of being backed up by Family Business, Johnny Evil is going to have a huge guy in an Elvis costume acting as Ariel's "bodyguard". He's just going to interfere in matches!
Marcum (in a "dumb guy" voice: Huh? Y'think so?
Monroe (angry): We'll be right back...
*cut to commercial*
