Once again Madman Marcum is standing outside the Allied Powers' locker room.

Out walks Intercuntinental title holder MisterJLA, with Captain Howdy.

Marcum: JLA! Congratulations on the Tag Team Title defense! Now's it time for you to defend the Intercuntinental title against the first champion EVAR, Nowhereman!

JLA: Isn't that something? Howdy and I just had to take care of *two* tag teams, now I have to defend the IC Belt? What's next? Does the RDCW want me to bring the DCMB Title out of retirement, and fight Oakers again? Fuck.

Marcum: Tonight we saw the "Justice Lock of America" for the first time. Do you plan on using it against Nowhereman to make him tap?

JLA: Yes. I plan on showing everyone that The Crippler Cuntface is an inferior submission hold. Ha. Cuntface. How appropriate, him being a real cunt and all. And now he wants the Cunt Championship? No way.

I'm the greatest CUNT holder ever!



Intercuntinental title: MisterJLA (Champion) vs. Nowhereman

If you smelllll what The Nock is cooking!


Nowherem...The Nock walks to the ring, looking very similar to another famous wrestler from years past. He rips a mic out James White's hand and begins to speak.

Finally, The Nock comes back to Roboken!

And The Nock says this, JLA, know your....

The Nock is interrupted by Rob's Killer Instinct Theme Music, as MisterJLA and Captain Howdy take the ramp. JLA stops and holds his chest as he approaches the ring.

JLA: FUCK! I'm in pain here, Howdy.

Howdy: Oh come on, his Rock impersonation ain't that bad!

JLA: No you dunce, not that! Although I admit, it's not half bad...I'm talking about our match earlier! I took a Clothesline from Hell, a powerslam, suplexes, Two Ton Tommy threw me like a football, and Nuriko hit me with some sucker punches!

I can't get in there and wrestle him!

Just then, Nowhereman reaches through the ropes, and pulls JLA into the ring! Lothar calls for the bell, and we're off!

Nowhereman gains the early advantage, and batters an already injured MisterJLA. Before long, he locks the champ in a Crippler Cuntface!

Monroe: A CUNTFACE! A CUNTFACE! A CUNTFACE!

Marcum: Don't say that about The Nock!

Monroe: I was talking about his submission hold, The Crippler Cuntface! Pay attention!

After being trapped in the hold for what seemed like ages, JLA manages to reach the ropes. As Lothar forces The Nock to break the hold, JLA catches his opponent with the dreaded "thumb to the eye"!

JLA now lands some glancing punches, chops, and kicks. He then lands a clothesline, which hurts him more than it hurts The Nock.

Monroe: Oh! He bent his arm back on that one!

Not discouraged, JLA completes some suplexes, and a back body drop...that sends Nowhereman into Lothar, knocking him out.

As Nowhereman gets to his feet, JLA delivers "The Final Justice", his swift kick to the balls!



JLA goes for the cover, but Lothar's knocked out.

Monroe: He's out again! There's a surprise!

JLA tries to revive Lothar, allowing The Nock to ambush him from behind!

Monroe: Never turn your back on Nowhereman, or you could wind up in a lot of pain!

Marcum: Many guys will agree with you there!

As JLA and Nowhereman begin to trade punches, Captain Howdy, tag team partner to JLA and long time associate to Nowhereman, stands on the ring apron. He places his boot on the top rope.

Monroe: He wants JLA to run the Nock's head into his boot! That's a tag maneuver they use all the time!

Marcum: Or maybe he wants The Nock to do that to JLA...they've been allies longer!

JLA staggers his enemy with another vicious "thumb to the eye" and Irish whips The Nock toward Howdy's boot...but at the last possible moment, The Nock reverses the Irish whip, and sends the IC Champ head first into the boot! JLA's head hits it at full speed, and the impact launches Howdy off the apron.

As JLA falls backward, The Nock rolls him up.

Lothar suddenly wakes up, and as The Nock places his feet on the second rope for added leverage, he gets the three count.

The winner and new IC Champ: Nowhereman.