*The Crotch is walking backstage when he hears a soft, sweet, sexy voice call out for him. He turns the corner and stops in his tracks as he comes face to face with Lor.*
Crotch: Whoa, Lor, I thought my attorney made it clear that you are not to come within one hundered feet of me, sweety.
Lor: Oh, I know that, darlin. Its just, <sighs> I feel so terrible about the way I've been treating you. I completely understand that your only option was to file a restraining order against me. That, or wearing full body armor, which your to hansome to cover that body up. But who else is there to interview me 'round here?
*Lor looks innocently up at the Crotch with her big green eyes filled with tears as shes about to cry.*
Crotch: I could call King Snarf Rules down here.
Lor: <shakes her head> Something tells me he won't be around anymore.
Crotch: Um, what about Chesty Lerou?
Lor: <sighs> Nope. She's too busy with her hunny.
Crotch: How about Joey Byles?
Lor: Yeeaauuch! You want me to defile myself by standing next to some third-rate company-less loser? Oh Crotch, I thought you liked me, darlin?
Crotch: Of course I like you, sweety, but even I can't do anything about that now. I filed a restraining order.
*Lor whips out a piece of paper.*
Lor: You mean this restraining order?
Crotch: How did you get that?
Lor: Does it matter? If you tear up this restraining order, darlin, then I can be within a hundered feet of you. In fact, I can be a lot closer than that. <wink>
Crotch: I, I can't. I'm really sorry, sweety, but my jaw still stings from that right you gave me a few weeks ago.
Lor: Ooo, are you sure, darlin? And here I was about to give you some...pie.
Crotch: P-pie? W-what kind of pie?
Lor: Oh, you know...my own very special recipe. <grins>
*The Crotch's mouth starts to water as he looks over Lor.*
Crotch: Um, but the thing is, sweety the restrainig order is out of my hands.
*Lor holds out the legal document and ogled him with her big green eyes.*
Lor: If you tear it up, darlin then there won't be any more restraining order.
*The Crotch snatches the paper and rips it to shreads. He then tosses the pieces of paper up in the air.*
Lor: See, that wasn't so...hard, was it?
Crotch: No, not at all. So, uh, I guess I should... interview, yea interveiw you now.
Lor: You could do that...unless you want your pie first?
Crotch: <eyes wide open> Um...s-sure. S-sounds good to me.
*Lor turns around and bends over, reaching towards the ground. The Crotch just stands there, staring with his head cocked.*
Crotch: <gulps> R-right here? N-now?
*Lor picks a small box up off the ground and turns back to face the Crotch, sweetly smiles all the way.*
Lor: Why not, no one will see us! Here you go!
Crotch: <surprised> That's the.... pie?
Lor: It is in deedy. My own special recipe, darlin! Go ahead, open it up and take in that aroma!
*The Crotch opens the lid a crack and takes a few cauious sniffs.*
Crotch: Wow! That does smell good! I had no idea you knew how to bake, Lor, sweety!
Lor: Oh, I'm just full of suprises. Well, darlin, what are you waiting for? Take a lick. <wink>
*The Crotch opens the lid and takes a finger full of pie. He places it in his mouth, and suddenly his expression changes from one of delight to one of utter disgust. He immediately begins to spit it out.*
Crotch: Yuck! What is this?
Lor: <looking all sad> You don't like my pie?
Crotch: Don't like it!? It's terrible! What did you put in it?
Lor: Mud.
Crotch: Mud?
Lor: Mud. As in mud pie. Here, have the rest!
*Lor stuffs the pie onto the Crotch's face. He quickly backs off and starts cleaning the mud off.*
Crotch: You bitch! I can't believe you just did that to me! And here I tore up the restraining or- oh no!
*Lor giggles then swiftly kicks him in the nuts and grabs his head as he leans over, delivering a Punch & Judy. Lor then slips seductively her hand into the Crotch's pocket and pulls out a mic. She turns it on and stand up.*
Lor: Are you paying attention, Sneaky, hun? You think a mud wrestling match is going to slow me down? Hunny, mud pies are my specialty! Say goodbye to the Boobie Belt, hun, because after tonight, you will never see that title again!
*Lor drops the mic, her nails clicking off of it and sexily walks off down the hall sloftly singing...
Lor: these boots where made for walk'n, and baby I'm gonna walk all over you...
*Lor does a little shake and hums the rest of the song down the hall as Havoc goes to break.*
Last edited by Lor; 2005-09-21 4:21 PM.
