Oh Shawn,Shawn!!!
I think I'm cute
I know I'm sexy
I got the moves that drives the girls wild!
James White:"Making his way to the ring......HBK,Shawn Nocheals!"
Marcum:"What the fuck?"
Monroe:"It says on this piece of paper HBK,Horrible Bloody Kunt!"
Marcum:"..."
HBK makes his way to the ring wearing what looks like some kinda gimp suit of armour
NM:"Well,well,well whats the Horrible Bloody Kunt doing out here right now,I hear you say. Shouldnt he be warming up for his number one contenders match tonight?"
NM looks around,basking in the adulation of the fans
NM:"Well Shawn Nochaels has been in this business 275 years,he has held every title in the RDCW,including the womens belt.
HBK has won the RDCW Rumble after entering at number one & personally threw 167 other superstars over the top rope.
This sexy boy broke his back posing for you fans,but after 56 years of rest I made my comeback,just for you guys!"
NM mugs to the crowd for more adulation
NM:"Now its been a longgggggggggggg while since I had a crack at the heavyweight cheese belt,and quite frankly its been painful watching the kind of trash that has held that belt in recent times!"
Crowd chants "Snarf cry baby!"
NM:"Yup,we had what appears to be an overgrown baby in the form of Queen Snafu,what would seem to be some kinda Richard Simmons clone in the form of PenWimp & now Jabba the hutt seems to be wearing the belt in the form of Joan Mammary!"
Crowd chants "Show us your tits Joan!"
NM:"None of those are too impressive to carry the name of this company,but they at least are better than the two guys I am gonna defeat tonight.
What kinda wrestling company would we be if we had pathetic champions like Captain Sumbitch or Sweaty Balls?"
Crowd laughs
NM:"So to save you fans from having to look at those sad excuses,I Shawn Nocheals will become the number one contender tonight,and after that I will take that rather enlarged belt from around the waist of Joan The Hutt!
I thank you!"
Sexy boy starts playing again as NM walks up the ramp way
Marcum:"..."
