There was a bright pink door and the brown lawn of autumn was strewn with sticky My Little Ponies. Uschi picked one up, it was a scratch and sniff. She scratched and sniffed, "this one smells like penis." Uschi shoved the pony down her pants and rubbed it furiously. Removing it from her pants, she smelled it again. "Now it smells like sex!"

Old men, fear me! You will shatter under my ruthless apathetic assault!

Uschi - 2
Old Men - 0

"I am convinced that this world is of no importance, and that the only people who care about dates are imbeciles and Spanish teachers." -- Jean Arp, 1921

"If Jesus came back and saw what people are doing in his name, he would never never stop throwing up." - Max von Sydow, "Hannah and Her Sisters"