The Family Gathering
Charlie, Johnny Evil, Howlerama, and El Superbeasto vs. Dave, LLance, the Liberal Conspiracy, and Jack Mehoff
The Family's opponents awaited them inring, as "Ecstasy of Gold" began to play over the RDCW soundsystem. Louie and Grace headed out onto the rampway first, with big smiles on their faces. They were followed by the Giant Luchadore, El Superbeasto, Howlerama (Howler & Highwayman), Johnny Evil, Ariel, and Big Fat Elvis, and finally, the new Hardcore Porn Champion, The Million Dollar Pitbull, Charlie.
As the Family takes the ring, their opponents attempt to get the upper hand, but are fought off as the Family members each go to work on their opponents. Dave attempts to organize his team members, but their inexperience as a group is no match for a focused and angry Bastardo Family. El Superbeasto works over the rookie Jack Mehoff with several Giant Headbutts, sending him out to the arena floor. He then aids Howlerama in taking down the Conspiracy members, grabbing them by the throat and holding them as Highwayman hits a Stand and Deliver superkick on Jim Jackson and Howler nails a Full Moon on Whomod.
Charlie goes toe to toe with LLance, working him over in the corner. LLance attempts to use his bulk to muscle Charlie in, but the Pitbull slips out and goes for a low blow Million Dollar Pitbull style. LLance drops down and rolls out to the floor where Howlerama and Superbeasto are waiting to inflict further pain on him. Dave tries to lock Johnny Evil into a Typhoid Slam, but Johnny reverses into a WEDWay Peoplemover and hits Mr. Toad's Wild Ride for good measure!
Monroe: Why isn't Lothar sorting this match out? This is chaos!
MarcuM: He knows better than to try and stop a pissed off Family!
A groggy Dave manages to make it to his corner, but the only teammate still standing is the rookie Jack Mehoff. Jack tags in and runs straight into a karate thrust from Johnny Evil. Johnny picks the rookie up and throws him into the ropes where Highwayman hits him with a knee to the back. Jack staggers out as he gets hit with Mr. Toad's Wild Ride! Johnny tags in Charlie who immediately sets up Jack for a Tower of London!
Monroe: They're brutalizing this poor kid!
MarcuM: They're setting an example of what happens when you mess with the Family!
Howler tags in and he and Highwayman pick up Jack and deliver La Cosa Bastardo! Finally El Superbeasto is tagged and he finishes Jack off with a Chokeslam to Oblivion! Superbeasto pins the rookie as the Family prevent any of Jack's teammates from making the save! Lothar counts to three as the Family climbs into the ring to celebrate and "Ecstasy of Gold" begins to play.
Louie's Lounge
Louie Bastardo takes a house mic and climbs into the ring as the Family celebrates their win.
LB: Cut the music! Get this piece of garbage out of our ring! What you've just witnessed is the rebirth of the latest incarnation of greatness! The only symbol of excellence in the RDCW! The Bastardo Family!
And at this moment, I'd like to send out a message to that piece of trailer trash known as Balls Nasty! Balls, how do you like being sent back into the gutter, boy? Oh, it took a little work, more than we initially expected, but the Family's never been afraid of doing hard work! We thrive on it! Can you say the same?
Because what you have to deal with now is a Family united! We've begun the job, and now we're going to step in and finish it! It could be El Superbeasto! He remembers what you did to him. Don't think he hasn't been planning ways to pay you back, son. It could be Howlerama! They'd love to put La Cosa Bastardo on you! It doesn't even have to be in the ring. It could be in a parking lot or an alley somewhere. If I liked you, Balls, I'd tell you to avoid your cheap whores and your crack dealers for the next few months. But I don't like you.
Johnny Evil's also come back like the prodigal son! Did you like his present for you at Halloween Handjobs, Balls?
JE: Trick or treat! Hahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!
LB: And least we forget, the Million $ Pitbull, the brand spankin new Hardcore Porn Champion, Charlie! How did it feel, Balls, to be outdone at your own game by the Family? We're not done with you yet, boy. You see, Conniver Series is coming up and Conniver Series has always been a special time for the Family. A Family tradition you might say. This year will be no different! We're challenging you to a match, boy! Elimination style! Four on four!
Now I know that you'll never be able to get three actual wrestlers to join up with you, so go ahead down to Snake's pool hall and round up your drinkin buddies Ugly Bob and Lazy Eyed Steve and whatever other wino you can grab to make it even! Because at Conniver Series, the Family is gonna carve up the biggest turkey in RDCW! A turkey named Balls Nasty!
Johnny Evil steps up to Louie and screams into the mic: "The Loose Cannon is the Big Gun! Evil is back, baby! Yeah!" Johnny steps away to high five BFE (BFE misses) and hugs Ariel.
El Superbeasto grabs the mic, his hand engulfing Louie's. ES: "I'm back, little chihuahuas. Go and run and hide under your master's beds. The Giant Luchadore has returned and all the Family's enemies will know what "True Lucha Style" means when I am done." Superbeasto releases the mic (and Louie's hand) and high fives Howlerama.
Charlie drapes the Hardcore Porn belt over his shoulder and begins to speak into the mic, but is interrupted as. . .
