<'Let's Get it Started' blares over the speakers and the crowd cheers loudly as Captain Sammitch makes his way to the ring accompanied by Chewy Walrus and Killconey. In place of his usual Colts jersey, Sammitch is wearing a T-shirt with his famous Lego Shark avatar. Killconey is wearing a T-shirt with 
on the front and pwn3d!!1! on the back, and Chewy Walrus is wearing a T-shirt with 
on the front and Oh yeah! on the back. The trio enters the ring and Sammitch is handed a microphone...>
CS: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen!
<Pops from the crowd...> We are
most of the Sudden Death Connection, and we would like to address a few
concerns of ours.
Louie: What's this? Is this Sammitch's open forum all of a sudden?
CS: First of all, it is our distinct pleasure to inform you that
all four of us will be competing in Rob's Randy Rumble!
<The crowd cheers wildly as Chewy takes a bow and Killconey raises the roof from atop a turnbuckle...> You're gonna
thrill to the high-flying heroics of Killconey, the
Man Without Fear! <More pops from the crowd as Killconey backflips off the turnbuckle...> Jaws will drop at the overwhelming power of
the mighty Chewy Walrus!! <More cheers as Chewy strikes a dramatic pose...> Everyone will be on the edge of their seat to cheer for the once and future champion,
Penwing!!! <The crowd begins chanting Penwing's name...> And by the way... yeah. I'm kind of in it too.
<The crowd is on their feet, chanting SDC! SDC! SDC!>
CS: Also at the Randy Rumble, Killconey here has stated that he'd be
more than happy to step into Spandex Monkey Man's Clockwork Banana House of Fun!
<The cheering continues...>
Monroe: Wow!
Louie: Hey, it'll be
his funeral!
CS: And last but not least, I will be taking on Doc Mid-Nite in a
Running Man Match for the Inter-Cunt-inental Title!
<The crowd goes ballistic...>
Louie: The hell's a
Running Man Match?!? 
CS: For those of you who don't know what the
Running Man Match is, it is a supreme contest of endurance and will designed by RDCW creative consultant Phil Smith. The Running Man Match begins not in the ring, but
half a mile from it. However, falls will
only count
in the ring. Outside the ring - no falls, no counts,
no disqualifications.
Monroe: What the hell?
CS: But it gets better. Between the starting line and the ring, there will be a number of designated Enforcers, including some of the RDCW's best! Their job is to do
whatever it takes to slow both competitors down. Why? Because if you can't make it to the ring within
ten minutes of the starting gun, you
forfeit the match.
Louie: He's lost his mind! The brain damage finally got to him!
CS: If you make it to the ring in time, the fun's just beginning. Once you get there, it's a standard-rules RDCW singles match, but you've gotta win not one, but
two out of three falls - pinfalls, count-outs, or tap-outs!
Monroe: That's incredible!
Louie: Nobody can do that!
CS: You may be telling yourselves, and telling each other, that
nobody can do that. But let me reassure you...
I can. And Doc Mid-Nite, if you wanna keep that Inter-Cunt-inental title of yours, you'd better be ready to do it too. I'll be sure to 'protect my neck', since you seem to be saying that a lot. But if you wanna be able to walk out of the Rumble in
any kind of shape, you'd better protect
more than that! At Rob's Randy Rumble, it's
you and me goin' after the IC!
<Huge pops from the crowd...>
CS: And finally, you may notice that Penwing's not here in the ring with us. He's actually not supposed to
be here tonight, though I've been told he's somewhere in the building. See, there's a bit of a
difference of opinion going on here. As much as you're all talking about how Penwing's losing it or going crazy or goingggggg to the daaaaark siiiiiiiiiiiiide... I don't care about any of that.
Louie: You better
start caring pretty soon, or else your boy Penwing is gonna bring that
connection of yours down!
CS: The
point is, we in the SDC have one very important principle that supersedes all the others - we look out for each other. We don't hang each other out to dry. But that's what Penwing did to Killconey last week.
<Murmurs from the crowd...>
Monroe: That's true. Penwing
completely hung Killconey out to dry!
CS: If you're out there, Penwing,
we're still here, regardless of what happened to you. I've been hit with burning chairs on a number of occasions, and I've had just as much shit happen to me. I'm not walking out on any of my teammates. And I can't let you drag us down with you. Just
let us help you, and give up this
path or whatever it is you're following. I helped
make you, Penwing, and so it really hurts me to say this, but if you don't stop this, you're gonna leave me no choice but to save you from yourself.
Monroe and Louie:
CS: But enough of that. We've got
matches tonight. Chewy here's gonna be taking on Doc Mid-Nite, and I can promise you all he's gonna give the good Doctor a run for his money!
<Pops from the crowd as Chewy acknowledges them...>
CS: As for me, I'll be stepping into the ring to square off against James Fantastic. Now, I don't have a
personal problem with James. He and I used to be teammates, and we still have a lot of the same goals and methods. But, nevertheless, the card says I'm gonna fight him, so you'll be seeing a
lot more of me tonight. James, if you're listening to this, you'd better bring your A-game, because you and I are gonna throw down tonight, and if you don't stay sharp, get ready to get pwn3d!!1!
Killconey: pwn3d!!1!
<'Let's Get it Started' hits again amid thunderous cheers from the crowd. Chewy flexes his muscles and Killconey jumps around the ring as Sammitch jumps to the top rope and salutes the crowd. The trio exits the ring and disappears backstage.>
