We go to Fat Retard backstage
FR:"Buhgawb,ah'v just been handed this video tape,and been told to play it!"
After much trouble trying to work out how to use the VCR,Fat Retard puts the tape in & presses play.
The picture appears on the screen & it appears to be a normal suburban street,then a rather battered looking Nowhereman steps into frame
NM:"Now,I bet you are all wondering what this is all about. Well thats what I am here to tell......or rather show you!"
NM starts to walk across the street
NM:"Now as you should all know,there was once a dominant tag team called The Hellions,which yours truly was the star of.
But a tag team isnt a tag team without a partner,and my partner was my pet monkey,Gimmp!"
NM stops at the door of a fairly ordinary looking house
NM:"Now,being that we worked so closely together,I got to know quite a bit about Cromm,and I thought it was time to give you guyz n galz an insight into who he is!"
NM knocks on the door!
NM:"This is where Groo lives,not very scary is it?"
An old lady answers the door,she looks like a stereotypical nice old lady
NM:"I'd like you all to meet Gonks mother!"
Old Lady:"Hello!"
NM:"Now Mrs.Gramps has agreed to let us all see the world her son lives in,when he is not acting all shit your pants scary!"
NM walks into the house,which is full of frilly curtains,china figurines and other homely touches!
NM:"So Mrs.Glomm,can we see where your son stays when he is home?"
OL:"Miss!"
NM:"Pardon?"
OL:"Its Miss.....I have no idea who his father is!"
NM:"Whoops,my bad! Anyway,lets see Grinches room!"
The old lady opens a door that leads to.............the basement!
NM:"Now as we can see,my old friend lives in his mothers basement......I do hope there are no socks laying around!"
As they reach the bottom of the stairs,we get to see "Grimms room"
NM:"Ok,what can we see. Well lets ignore the Justin Timberlake poster on the wall,lets have a look through his CD collection."
NM begins pulling out random CDs
NM:"Backstreet Boys........Vanilla Ice.........Marky Mark & His Funky Bunch......The Spice Girls.....Barry Manilowe Nowhereman looks round & deftly slips the CD into his pocket.........David Hasselhoff.......The Village People!"
NM walks away
NM:"Ok,lets forget about that. Now this looks better,he appears to have some action figures........my mistake,My Little Pony does not count as action figures!"
NM walks over to the PC on the desk in the corner of the room
NM:"Hmmm,looks like the PC is already on,lets check out my old friends internet bookmarks!"
NM begins clicking
NM:"Ok,lets forget about that,this isnt an x-rated show and it certainly isnt the GBW federation!"
NM glances at the bed which has a Strawberry Shortcake duvet cover on it,and shakes his head!
NM:"Ok,I think we have seen enough here. So Gaymm,the Rumble is approaching & you wanna try to put me out of action,but as yet,you have yet to face me one on one! We all know its cause you know you cannot defeat me in a fair fight. Dont get too comfortable wearing that belt,cause its coming home with me,not home to your mummys basement!"
NM walks past the camera,as the cameraman focuses in on a framed picture of Rob Kamphausen on the bedsite locker
