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Timelord. Drunkard. 15000+ posts
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 Apparently, at a press screening of Clerks II, Good Morning America movie critic Joel Siegel walked out of the movie 40 minutes in. Kevin Smith has replied to Siegel's storming out of the screening after reportedly saying "Time to go!" on his blog at SilentBobSpeaks.com. Siegel was quoted by the Post afterwards saying, ""First movie I've walked out of in 30 [expletive] years! It was so foul and mean and repulsive. I finally realized I could not say anything positive. I wasn't ready for this kind of smut...I hope he doesn't make any more movies." Smith's reaction: Quote:
So last night, at a press screening of “Clerks II” in New York City, “Good Morning America” movie critic Joel Siegel decided he’d had enough of my shenanigans, and walked out of the flick at the forty minute mark. You’d imagine this would bother me, and yet, I’m as delighted by this news as I was with the eight minute standing ovation “Clerks II” received in Cannes.
I mean, it’s Joel Siegel, for Christ’s sake. As Paul Thomas Anderson once said of the man, getting a bad review from Siegel is like a badge of honor. This is the guy who stole his mustachioed critic shtick from Gene Shalit years ago, and still refuses to give it back. This is a guy who seemingly prides himself on being “punny” - that is, he likes to add his own nyuk-nyuk wordplay into the reviews he writes/gives.
For “Pirates 2″, he made us all titter with “Yo, Ho, Ho and a Bottle of Fun”.
For Pixar’s lastest, he made us squeal with delight when he wrote “Wheelie Good Time for ‘Cars’”.
Can you believe he somehow not only made us laugh, but also think, when he challenged our perception with “X-Men’ Fails to X-cite”?
I mean, Fozzy fucking Bear laughs at this guy (AT, mind you, not WITH).
So while I feel like my life will be a little bleaker now that I’ll never know what pun Joel would’ve dug deeply into his comedic well to produce for “Clerks II” (”‘Clerks II?’ More like ‘Jerks, Too’!”), I’ve gotta admit that I’m relieved somebody was finally offended by the flick - enough to head for the exit less than an hour in. I was beginning to think I was losing my touch.
I can’t fault Mr. Siegel for feeling “revolted” (his producer’s description of Joel’s reaction) by our flick; in truth, there is a donkey show in it, and I recognize that brand of whimsy might not be for everybody. Film appreciation is very subjective, and maybe Joel just isn’t into ass-to-mouth conversations.
However, I CAN fault him for the manner in which he left the screening.
Apparently, rather than quietly exit, both Joel and his Cum-Catcher (my slang for the fancy kind of mustache he sports) made a big stink about walking out, calling as much attention to himself as possible, and being generally pretty disruptive.
Check this shit out: roughly forty minutes into the flick, when Randal orders up the third act donkey show, Siegel bellowed to his fellow critics “Time to go!'’ and “This is the first movie I’ve walked out of in 30 fucking years!'’
Now, I don’t need Joel Siegel to suck my dick the way he apparently sucks M. Night’s, gushing over his flick before he’s even seen it; but shit, man - how about a little common fucking courtesy?
Never mind the fact that when you’re paid to watch movies for a living and the only tasks required of you are to a) sit through said movies and b) write your thoughts about them before your deadline, walking out before a movie’s over is pretty unprofessional. Never mind the fact that the scene he was offended by (the ordering of the donkey show), with its (misleading) crude references is only the set-up to a third act pay-off that is a true bait-and-switch from where Joel’s imagination went (and if you’ve already seen the flick, you KNOW what I’m talking about). Never mind that this dude is so straight-laced in his tastes and hyperbolic in his praise that when The Onion took a poke at Joel, I was almost unsure whether it was a joke or not…
You never… NEVER disrupt a movie, simply because you don’t like it.
Cardinal rule of movie-going: shut your fucking mouth while the movie’s playing. They even ask you to do so in the pre-show run-up to every flick (”Cell phones and pagers off, no talking during the show”). This guy went beyond talking, even; he was making a spectacle of himself as he left. I’ve now spoken to three folks in attendance last night, and all have said that Siegel WANTED everyone to know how disgusted he was, and that he was leaving. If you want to share your displeasure with everyone, that’s fine, dude; just do it AFTER the movie, not during. Some folks were enjoying themselves. I don’t come down to your job and slap the taste out of your mouth for coming up with a line like “‘Shark Tale’ Is a Halibut Good Time”; so don’t fuck with my stuff WHILE IT’S STILL SCREENING.
Shit, Joel, I know you like being on camera and all, but was it so difficult to not be the center of attention for 40 minutes that you just had to sparkle, Neely, sparkle-it up for your peers instead of showing them a little goddamn courtesy by leaving the theater the way most people do, either during or after the picture: quietly? What are you, a twelve year old boy, cutting loose with your pals at a Friday night screening of “Scary Movie 4″ while your parents are in a theater down the hall watching “The Devil Wears Prada”? Leave the diva-like behavior and drama-queen antics to the movie stars, not the movie reviewer, ya’ rude-ass prick.
It makes me laugh to think that, had Joel stayed ’til the end (like any good critic would for any movie they’re paid to watch), he would’ve seen that we weren’t going where he seemed to think we were going. But apparently, Joel took a cue from his own “Poseiden” review, in which he wrote “Audiences today wouldn’t stand for an hour of exposition before the flood hit. In fact, they wouldn’t stand; they’d walk out.” Well, Magnum (y’know - because of the mustache), I guess you’re a member of that same audience that can’t stand exposition.
Look, I don’t hate the guy. Shit, I’m glad he survived his fairly recent bout with cancer. But his behavior in that screening was unconscionable and professionally unethical, not to mention childishly disruptive. And while I might get laughed at for saying this… well, I just expected more from Joel Siegel.
*sigh*
whomod said: I generally don't like it when people decide to play by the rules against people who don't play by the rules. It tends to put you immediately at a disadvantage and IMO is a sign of true weakness. This is true both in politics and on the internet." Our Friendly Neighborhood Ray-man said: "no, the doctor's right. besides, he has seniority."
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Kevin was on Opie and Anthony yesterday and the buh-buh-buh-boys actually got Siegel on the phone to talk about the incident. While Siegel said he was proud of what he did, he did apologize to Kevin and admitted that he thought Kevin was a gifted filmmaker. There's a link to the audio on that site.
Personally, I agree with Kevin. A film critic has a job. That job is to watch and review movies. If he was offended, or just didn't like it, than he writes a scathingly bad review and that's that. While Kevin absolves him for walking out, I think it was unprofessional and the yelling at...well, whoever Siegel was yelling at...was inexcusable. It pisses me off when average viewers do it. I expect better for a guy who gets paid to watch movies. He should give Gene Shalit his shtick back and just retire...but only after he made sure that I was his successor - I'd love to do that job!
Uschi said:I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry. MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost! "I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock ![[Linked Image from i6.photobucket.com]](http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y203/JoeMama13/RedSoxBanner05.png)
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Very unprofessional behavior.
"I offer you a Vulcan prayer, Mr Suder. May your death bring you the peace you never found in life." - Tuvok. 
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devil-lovin' Bat-Man 15000+ posts
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A true profesional like Joe Quesada would never walk out of a movie just because it involves donkey sex.
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1 Millionth Customer 10000+ posts
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Quote:
Im Not Mister Mxypltk said:
A true profesional like Joe Quesada would never walk out of a movie just because it involves donkey sex.
JQ would be the next pee wee.
Bow ties are coool.
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Quote:
r3x29yz4a said:
Quote:
Im Not Mister Mxypltk said:
A true profesional like Joe Quesada would never walk out of a movie just because it involves donkey sex.
JQ would be the next pee wee.
JQ: C'mon, Brian. Let's get outta here.
Bendis: But boss! Don't you want to see the movie?
JQ: I don't need to see it, Brian. I lived it...
Uschi said:I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry. MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost! "I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock
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Or, if Bendis wrote the script: Quote:
JQ: C'mon, Brian.
Bendis: C'mon?
JQ: Yeah. C'mon.
Bendis: Where're we going?
JQ: We're leaving.
Bendis: We're leaving?
JQ: Yes.
Bendis: Yeah?
JQ: Yup.
Bendis: Leaving?
JQ: We are.
Bendis: But why?
JQ: Why?
Bendis: Why?
JQ: I don't need to see this movie...
Bendis: You don't?
JQ: I don't...
Bendis: Need to see?
JQ: The movie.
Bendis: The movie?
JQ: Right.
Bendis: You don't need to see the movie?
JQ: That's what I said.
Bendis: Yeah. Right. You said that. But why?
JQ: I live it.
Bendis: You lived it???
JQ: No, I LIVE it!
Bendis: You live it?
JQ: Right.
Bendis: Yeah?
JQ: Yeah.
Bendis: Oh. (pause) What does that mean?
JQ: What does what mean?
Bendis: That thing.
JQ: The thing?
Bendis: Yeah, that thing. The thing you said. About not seeing. But living. You live that movie. That's what you said.
JQ: Right. I said that. That's what I said. So what's your question.
Bendis: My question is, "What did you mean by what you said when you said you live that?"
JQ: I mean I fuck donkey.
Bendis: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT???
JQ: I. Fuck. Donkeys. I fuck. Donkeys. I. Fuck donkeys. I fuck donkeys.
Bendis: You fuck donkeys?
JQ: I do. I fuck 'em.
Bendis: You do?
JQ: Yes.
(Pause)
(Longer pause)
(Still longer pause)
Bendis: My comic writing is just an extension of my masturbatory habits. I yank my crank more than MisterJLA. I pound my pud more than Rex. I jack off a LOT!
JQ: Do you fuck donkeys?
Bendis: Do I...?
JQ: ...fuck donkeys.
Bendis: Um...no.
JQ: Well, okay then.
Uschi said:I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry. MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost! "I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock
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The conscience of the rkmbs! 15000+ posts
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Kevin Smithy's whining.....He should stop.
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Quote:
Pariah said:
I'm whining.....I should stop.
Fixed
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The conscience of the rkmbs! 15000+ posts
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Does this mean you're gay for Kevin Smith?
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Pariah, do you actually know what a woman is?
Cause a woman sure as hell cant be "gay" for a man!
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Educator to comprehension impaired (JLA, that is you) 50000+ posts
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Quote:
britneyspearsatemyshorts said:
anti-wickite!
You're entering a world of pain.
Bow ties are coool.
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notnotnotnotnotnotnotwedge 2500+ posts
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Quote:
Son of Mxy said:
Ariel is a woman?
Yes, I've checked thoroughly. But, if it makes you feel better, I'll check again. 
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Sorry, my hands were busy.
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Regenerated 15000+ posts
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Fucking with Kevin Smith is like fucking with Trey Parker & Matt Stone: they will eat you fucking ALIVE with their wit. Siegel is a schmuck. All movie critics are. They have the easiest fucking jobs on the planet.
Pariah doesn't like Smith's rebuttal because he knew everyone agrees with Smith, and is simply trying to start an argument (i.e. trying to get attention).
Ariel is, indeed, a woman. Or, so Notwedge has said.
Nowhereman is, indeed, a cunt. Or, so the world has taught me...
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cookie monster 7500+ posts
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Quote:
Prometheus said:
Fucking with Kevin Smith is like fucking with Trey Parker & Matt Stone: they will eat you fucking ALIVE with their wit. Siegel is a schmuck. All movie critics are. They have the easiest fucking jobs on the planet.
It also helps that Smith happens to right in this matter - what Siegel did was totally rude in this instance.
Quote:
Nowhereman is, indeed, a cunt. Or, so the world has taught me...
Was this point under debate?
 Dear, sweet Harley Kwink...I'm madly in love with you. Marry me! We can go to Canadia. Or Boston or something. It'll be grand...You know the cookies are a given. They are ALWAYS a given. You could dump me tomorrow and you'd still get the cookies. Boston..shit, wherever dyke weddings were legalized. And where better to rub their little piggie noses in how bad they suck than right on their doorstep? What are they gonna do? Be jealous of you? Stare furiously at your tah-tahs? Not willingly give you cookies, but instead begrudgingly give you their cookies? Woman, time to wake up to the powers you wield - Uschi
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Regenerated 15000+ posts
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I tend to look at the big picture, you know...
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cookie monster 7500+ posts
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Dear, sweet Harley Kwink...I'm madly in love with you. Marry me! We can go to Canadia. Or Boston or something. It'll be grand...You know the cookies are a given. They are ALWAYS a given. You could dump me tomorrow and you'd still get the cookies. Boston..shit, wherever dyke weddings were legalized. And where better to rub their little piggie noses in how bad they suck than right on their doorstep? What are they gonna do? Be jealous of you? Stare furiously at your tah-tahs? Not willingly give you cookies, but instead begrudgingly give you their cookies? Woman, time to wake up to the powers you wield - Uschi
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Who will I break next? 15000+ posts
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Kevin Smith told off some old irrelevant film critic witha pedophile moustache. Lets all suck his cock!  x a billion
November 6th, 2012: Americas new Independence Day.
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Quote:
Prometheus said:
Pariah doesn't like Smith's rebuttal because he knew everyone agrees with Smith, and is simply trying to start an argument (i.e. trying to get attention).
What rebuttal? It's just a huge whine-fest that everyone makes a big deal out of because they worship Kevin Smith.
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
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Quote:
rex said:
Kevin Smith told off some old irrelevant film critic witha pedophile moustache. Lets all suck his cock!
x a billion
No, Rex. You'll be participating in a donkey show.
Uschi said:I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry. MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost! "I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock
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Who will I break next? 15000+ posts
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Quote:
Joe Mama said:
Quote:
rex said:
Kevin Smith told off some old irrelevant film critic witha pedophile moustache. Lets all suck his cock!
x a billion
Me first!
November 6th, 2012: Americas new Independence Day.
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
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Quote:
rex said:
Quote:
Joe Mama said:
Quote:
rex said:
Kevin Smith told off some old irrelevant film critic witha pedophile moustache. Lets all suck his cock!
x a billion
No, Rex. You'll be participating in a donkey show.
Oh BOY!!! I'm the luckiest donkey sucker in Eugene Oregon!!!
Merry Christmas, Rex.
Uschi said:I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry. MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost! "I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock
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cookie monster 7500+ posts
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cookie monster 7500+ posts
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Quote:
Joe Mama said:
Quote:
rex said:
Quote:
Joe Mama said:
Quote:
rex said:
Kevin Smith told off some old irrelevant film critic witha pedophile moustache. Lets all suck his cock!
x a billion
No, Rex. You'll be participating in a donkey show.
Oh BOY!!! I'm the luckiest donkey sucker in Eugene Oregon!!!
Merry Christmas, Rex.
Guys, do you really think that Joe Q is gonna share his donkey?
Dear, sweet Harley Kwink...I'm madly in love with you. Marry me! We can go to Canadia. Or Boston or something. It'll be grand...You know the cookies are a given. They are ALWAYS a given. You could dump me tomorrow and you'd still get the cookies. Boston..shit, wherever dyke weddings were legalized. And where better to rub their little piggie noses in how bad they suck than right on their doorstep? What are they gonna do? Be jealous of you? Stare furiously at your tah-tahs? Not willingly give you cookies, but instead begrudgingly give you their cookies? Woman, time to wake up to the powers you wield - Uschi
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No, but I am quite willing to share Pariah with rex.
I like donkey butt.
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
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Uschi said:I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry. MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost! "I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock
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Its my three year anniversary today so I am feeling generous.
I like donkey butt.
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cookie monster 7500+ posts
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Dear, sweet Harley Kwink...I'm madly in love with you. Marry me! We can go to Canadia. Or Boston or something. It'll be grand...You know the cookies are a given. They are ALWAYS a given. You could dump me tomorrow and you'd still get the cookies. Boston..shit, wherever dyke weddings were legalized. And where better to rub their little piggie noses in how bad they suck than right on their doorstep? What are they gonna do? Be jealous of you? Stare furiously at your tah-tahs? Not willingly give you cookies, but instead begrudgingly give you their cookies? Woman, time to wake up to the powers you wield - Uschi
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Joined: Feb 2001
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Regenerated 15000+ posts
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Quote:
rex said:
Kevin Smith told off some old irrelevant film critic witha pedophile moustache. Lets all suck his cock!
x a billion
Wow...someone gets bitter when they don't get their weekend chats.
Or a nap...
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Who will I break next? 15000+ posts
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Are you still butt hurt over the Michelle Rodriguez thing?
November 6th, 2012: Americas new Independence Day.
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 33,385 Likes: 3
Regenerated 15000+ posts
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Regenerated 15000+ posts
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 33,385 Likes: 3 |
Quote:
Pariah said:
Quote:
Prometheus said:
Pariah doesn't like Smith's rebuttal because he knew everyone agrees with Smith, and is simply trying to start an argument (i.e. trying to get attention).
What rebuttal? It's just a huge whine-fest that everyone makes a big deal out of because they worship Kevin Smith.
I think you'll find that the first person to "whine" was Siegel, my dear fruitcake.
BTW....it's been driving me crazy...WHERE is your avatar from? Who is that girl?
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