The fearsome Vertigo Man and Circle Jerk (working name), super-villains in training, are currently standing on the roof of an apartment complex, exposing their bare buttocks to passer-bys. They are not completely drunk yet, but they're sure working on it.
"FEAR MY DEADLY GAS OF INSTANT DEATH, BIATCHES!!!" Vertigo Man yells to an elderly couple down on the street, as he proceeds to fart in their general direction. Even though it's just regular non-deadly body gas and it's coming from the roof of a two-story building, the old couple begins to run away in terror.
Meanwhile, Circle Jerk struts his exposed stuff to the music coming from the party. "Heeeeey..." CJ suddenly stops his arrhythmic white dancing and peeks down to the yard where the celebrations are taking place. "I think I've seen that blonde chick before..."
Vertigo Man pulls up his pants and inmediately pushes his partner in crime down to the floor. "Don't let 'em see us up here, you idiot! Whadda you, you wanna get us kicked out? That what you want? How are we gonna get more beer, then?"
"Don't push me, hypocrite!" the still de-pantsed CJ exclaims. "You let those people in the street take a pretty good look at you just now!"
"Yeah, but they weren't in the party, moron. 'Sides, if a bitch looks familiar to you it's probably because I banged her," VM states with a completely serious expression. "I'm not paying no child support. No way."
CJ rubs his ankle, sore from the fall. "Yeah, yeah, I get it... But you didn't have to push me, dude."
"Stop being a baby and, and act responsibly for once." VM begins removing his pants again, having spotted a group of children coming on the street. "You're an adult, for fuck's sake... *cough*... HEY KIDS!!! FEAR MY--"
"Who the fuck are you two?!" comes a booming voice from the stairs leading to the roof.
Circle Jerk clumsily gets up from the floor and faces the large Samoan in front of him. "We... we were... we're just... we were... I mean... we..." The young villain wannabe looks at his partner for help, only to find him frozen at the sight of the giant man. "We, we live here. Yeah."
"Oh, that so?" The angry Samoan crosses his arms. "Because I live here and I've never seen either of you PUNKS."
"...we're new...?" CJ shrugs.
The man's as of now pissed expression changes to one of pure anger, and his look alone nearly causes the dangerous duo to lose bowel control... which would be unfortunate right now, since they still have no pants on.
Then, he laughs.
"Dude! Guy!" the tall Samoan says to a not-quite-so-tall-but-still-pretty-big round person walking up the stairs. "I just scared these two guys to shit!"
"So... you don't live here?" CJ asks, noticeably calmer. Vertigo Man, on the other hand, looks annoyed instead of relieved.
"NAW! We live in the apartment block near the entrance," the Samoan says, trying to contain his laughter. "We only come here to get shitfaced and throw bottles at the pedestrians, and..." He begins laughing again. "Oh, man! You shoulda seen your faces!"
"What are you, a fucking comedian? Ha. Fucking. Ha." VM defiantly says. CJ covers his face, thinking Oh boy, here we go again...
"Thank you, I thought it was a good one too," the Samoan replies, completely missing the sarcasm. VM, ready to use his powers, is about to continue his provocation... until he notices the Samoan's friend coming up the stairs.
"Anybody wanna give me a hand with all this stuff?" Guy says, carrying several crates of beer. "Jesus, Barry, I don't know how we're gonna drink all this shit..."
"You lazy fat fuck! We drink twice for breakfast. You just want me to carry everything myself like usual..." The Samoan, a.k.a. Barry, turns to look at his two new acquaintances. "Hey, you two not interested in helping an obese man in exchange for some beer, are ya?"
CJ and VM look at each, and grin.
