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#918551 2008-01-29 9:24 PM
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Yes, this is a thread for all the Saturday morning cartoons that've scarred me terribly. Up first, Happy Days!



Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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The Dukes of Hazzard



Bonus points for using the original music, but negative points for the Dukes that are actually in the cartoon (you can't tell, but those are the replacement Dukes, Coy and Vance. Feh!)


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

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Hammerman!



Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

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Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventures!



Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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 Originally Posted By: King Snarf
The Dukes of Hazzard


Kind of ironic, given that "Dukes" was pretty much a cartoon in the first place.

Oh, and even as a kid wouldn't you kind of wonder how inbred redneck mechanic Cooter suddenly had the technology to trick out the General like the batmobile?

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 Originally Posted By: King Snarf
Happy Days


I wonder why they used Ralph instead of Potsy...you don't supposed that even Anson Williams could tell that this was a piece of shit?

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Laverne and Shirely Join the Army:


Not just a shitty cartoon, but a shitty cartoon that stole hand over fist from the Goldie Hawn movie "Private Benjamin."

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Gilligan's Planet:



One of the posters on YouTube sums it perfectly with a single question: "you mean the professor could build a space worthy rocket but not a boat that could cross the ocean?"

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Godzilla and Godzooky



Jesus, man. Even Scrappy Doo looked down on fucking Godzooky.

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The Partridge Family 2200 AD



It's the Jetsons. Not just a ripoff of the Jetson, but same concept, the same artwork, the same sound effects. The only difference is that they animated poorly drawn likeness of Shirley Jones, Danny Bonaduce, etc., into the old Jetson animation backgrounds.

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Turbo Teen!



Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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Rubik, the Amazing Cube (featuring a theme song by Menudo, no less!)



Much how Thelma (Velma?) would lose her glasses in every episode of Scooby-Doo, so too would Rubik get mixed up, forcing one of those adorable Mxycan children to fix him.


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

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The Drack Pack



I only vaguely remember this one, but man, that Drac Jr. looks queer.


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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Camp Candy



It's John Candy! At summer camp! Doesn't that sound fun? If it does, then I'm explaining it wrong.


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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The original Super Friends



Seriously. Even as a kid (I was nine when it first aired), I thought that was a complete bastardization of the Justice League.

First, of course, you had the idiotic emphasis on Wendy, Marvin and Wonder Dog, an inclusion especially nonsensical when you had Robin (himself a teen sidekick) there already. If they thought the needed teenaged junior Superfriends and a dog, why not use the Teen Titans and Krypto?

Second, because the early 1970s was the era of government regulation of Saturday morning television, they couldn't action show the heroes throwing a punch (or anything else that might count as "action"). As a result, the "action" consisted of Superman lifting things (hey, maybe this is where Singer got HIS inspiration), Wonder Woman flying around in a plane, Aquaman swimming and Batman driving around in his car a lot.

Third, and related to the second, there were no actual villains. The antagonists tended to be well meaning mad scientists who were trying to solve some sort of ecological or societal problem and who would generally screw it up worse, prompting our heroes to lecture them about how individual responsibility was more important to save the world (Um, okay, this part was actually not bad. No wonder I became a republican).

Finally, the stories had even less internal logic that a typical Saturday morning cartoon. For example, I remember one episode where Superman would struggle to lift, I dunno, a bulldozer in one scene and then pick up an ocean liner later in the episode. Even as a kid I remember thinking "WTF? An ocean liner is obviously heavier than a bulldozer".

Really, the only thing about it that was cool was the original theme music.

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 Originally Posted By: King Snarf
The Drack Pack...I only vaguely remember this one, but man, that Drac Jr. looks queer.


Geez, yeah. I never saw that one but you're right. And why was the snake afraid of a bat in that clip?

There were a couple of kids' shows with that same basic premise over the years including a live action one called "the Monster Squad" (no relation to the 80s movie) where Frankenstein, Dracula and the Wolfman fought crime with a sidekick played by Fred Grandy (later Gopher from the Love Boat):



And, of course, they were all (to one extent or another) "inspired" by the success of the pretty entertaining (at least when I was a kid) "Archie" spinoff "Groovie Ghoulies"



That show, like the Archies, actually spawed a hit single "Chick A Boom (Don't You Just Love It):


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notnotnotnotnotnotnotwedge
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 Originally Posted By: King Snarf
Yes, this is a thread for all the Saturday morning cartoons that've scarred me terribly. Up first, Happy Days!



The really ironic thing is that Mr. Cool is, in fact, the least cool character in television history.


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 Originally Posted By: notwedge

The really ironic thing is that Mr. Cool is, in fact, the least cool character in television history.


But only because Keith Olbermann turned out to be a real person

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 Originally Posted By: King Snarf

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brother from another mother
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 Originally Posted By: notwedge
 Originally Posted By: King Snarf
Yes, this is a thread for all the Saturday morning cartoons that've scarred me terribly. Up first, Happy Days!



The really ironic thing is that Mr. Cool is, in fact, the least cool character in television history.

uh maze ing

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 Originally Posted By: King Snarf
Yes, this is a thread for all the Saturday morning cartoons that've scarred me terribly. Up first, Happy Days!


The fact that you watched all of these cartoons explains why you can't get laid.


Uschi said:
I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry.

MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost!

"I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock

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whomod said: I generally don't like it when people decide to play by the rules against people who don't play by the rules.
It tends to put you immediately at a disadvantage and IMO is a sign of true weakness.
This is true both in politics and on the internet."

Our Friendly Neighborhood Ray-man said: "no, the doctor's right. besides, he has seniority."
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 Originally Posted By: King Snarf
Hammerman!


wow. i haven't thought about this show in 15 years.

 Quote:
Laverne and Shirely Join the Army:

I like how they didn't think joining the army, fighting king kong, and going into space was enough of a hook so they added a pig.


Bow ties are coool.
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A talking pig voiced by the guy who played "Horshack" from "Welcome Back Kotter."

You know, the funny thing is: when I was a kid and that show (the live action one) was popular most of us (kids, that is) actually watched it because we thought Lenny and Squiggy were funny. You'd think the producers would have realized that kids would have been more likely to enjoy a cartoon about them (and they were cartoonish to begin with).

Of course, neither Michael McKean or David Lander were related to the producer so...

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Bow ties are coool.
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Yet another Michael J. Fox movie turned animated series.



whomod said: I generally don't like it when people decide to play by the rules against people who don't play by the rules.
It tends to put you immediately at a disadvantage and IMO is a sign of true weakness.
This is true both in politics and on the internet."

Our Friendly Neighborhood Ray-man said: "no, the doctor's right. besides, he has seniority."
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I'm still waiting for "Doc Hollywood: The Animated Series"


Bow ties are coool.
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The same with me and Bright Lights, Big City


whomod said: I generally don't like it when people decide to play by the rules against people who don't play by the rules.
It tends to put you immediately at a disadvantage and IMO is a sign of true weakness.
This is true both in politics and on the internet."

Our Friendly Neighborhood Ray-man said: "no, the doctor's right. besides, he has seniority."
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From the 'beating a dead horse' category.



whomod said: I generally don't like it when people decide to play by the rules against people who don't play by the rules.
It tends to put you immediately at a disadvantage and IMO is a sign of true weakness.
This is true both in politics and on the internet."

Our Friendly Neighborhood Ray-man said: "no, the doctor's right. besides, he has seniority."
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Bow ties are coool.
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I remember this one coming on after Pee Wee's Playhouse.



whomod said: I generally don't like it when people decide to play by the rules against people who don't play by the rules.
It tends to put you immediately at a disadvantage and IMO is a sign of true weakness.
This is true both in politics and on the internet."

Our Friendly Neighborhood Ray-man said: "no, the doctor's right. besides, he has seniority."
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From the 'of all the characters to spin off for a cartoon, why these' pile:





whomod said: I generally don't like it when people decide to play by the rules against people who don't play by the rules.
It tends to put you immediately at a disadvantage and IMO is a sign of true weakness.
This is true both in politics and on the internet."

Our Friendly Neighborhood Ray-man said: "no, the doctor's right. besides, he has seniority."
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 Originally Posted By: thedoctor
I remember this one coming on after Pee Wee's Playhouse.



Galaxy High was awesome!


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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The Wuzzles



Proving that not every Disney Cartoon from the 80's was as good as Gummi Bears or Ducktales....


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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Punky Brewster



Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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Mr. T



Watching that intro, I'm left with one question- What on earth did that alligator do to Mr. T? Judging from that clip, it looked like he was just minding his own business, lazily swimming along, and then Mr. T flings him by the tail.


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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Denver the Last Dinosaur



The worst thing about this is the theme song- it'll stick in your head and never, EVER leave.


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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Chuck Norris Karate Kommandos



Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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Rambo



Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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 Originally Posted By: King Snarf
Mr. T


You know, that little white kid who tried to dress and talk like Mr. T might have been the worlds' first 'wigger.'

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